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17 Disconcertingly Positive Signs Your Ex is Definitely over You ...

Lyndsie

17 Disconcertingly Positive Signs Your Ex is Definitely over You ...
17 Disconcertingly Positive Signs Your Ex is Definitely over You ...

Is there anything more frustrating than noticing all those apparently positive signs your ex is over you? Trust me, I've been there, and it's like trying to scoop up water with a sieve—utterly futile and making a mess. As we traverse the sticky landscape of post-relationship life in 2024, it can feel like deciphering an ancient script just to figure out what our exes are thinking. Whether it's through the grapevine or that eerie sixth sense we all suddenly acquire after a breakup, understanding these signs can be a freaky yet enlightening experience.

First off, let's talk about when your ex has seemingly vanished from social media. In this digital age, unfollowing or unfriending can be a huge deal—almost like the modern version of “talk to the hand.” The first glaring signs your ex is definitely over you might actually be when they disappear from your online circles. But why? Are they avoiding the temptation to check out your new (and totally fabulous) life? Or is it a definitive step toward moving on? Either way, they’re making it clear they're not hanging around for a reboot.

Another obvious indicator is when they start dating someone new. I know, I know—seeing your ex with someone else can be akin to taking a slap to the face with a wet fish. Yet, it's also weirdly positive because it’s clear: they’re not living in the past. You might want to peek into our section on "Signs They Have Moved On Emotionally" for more gut-punching insights on this one.

And then there’s the extreme makeover—no, not the TV show, but the total 180 your ex's life undergoes. Perhaps they've taken up veganism, astrology, or suddenly become a CrossFit enthusiast. While you might be scratching your head, wondering if aliens have abducted your ex, it’s more about them reclaiming their life and identity outside of the relationship. For the nitty-gritty, dive into "Lifestyle Changes".

On a lighter note, sharing mutual friends can be disconcertingly tricky when post-breakup vibes are in the air. Suddenly, your friends might drop hints about your ex's new hobbies, purchases, or even their weekend trips to Ibiza. It's like an unsolicited subscription to the ‘Ex’s Life Digest.’ If you’re wondering what these anecdotes mean, take a glance at "Feedback from Mutual Friends".

Laughing helps too. So, remind yourself: the universe has a sense of humor. The multitude of signs your ex is moved on are both discombobulating and humorous in their own right. Sure, it stings, but remember, by recognizing these signs, you're also giving yourself permission to do the same.

So, buckle up and join us as we decode these glaringly obvious, yet sometimes hilariously painful, signals. Your heartbreak survival guide awaits!

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1. A New Number

One of the surest signs your ex is over you is if he changes his number – and doesn't say a word about it or let you in on the new digits. It may mean that he doesn't want to be readily available to you any longer. In this case an ex is generally trying to make a new start.

2. A Change of Location

Ditto with this choice. It doesn't mean your ex is moving, but he or she might start hanging out at different places. For example, if the two of you made a point of hanging out a certain bar or restaurant, he might start looking for a new hangout.

Frequently asked questions

3. Less Texting

It's not uncommon for you two to keep texting each other when you've just broken up. If your ex starts sending fewer messages, it may mean he's ready to move on. If that's the case, inundating him with messages is a bad move.

4. No Emails

Similarly, if he used to send cute emails, jokes, forwards, or just chatty notes and they start to taper off, that's one of the signs your ex is over you. Again, it suggests he's ready to move on. Keeping in close contact might bring up too many memories, or he might just be trying to phase out of your life – and to phase you out of his.

5. A Social Network Lockdown

Are you two friends on Facebook, Twitter, and other social networks? If you find that you can't see as many of his posts, he's probably getting over you. He may even un-friend or un-follow you to get the message across.

6. He's Never Home

When you start getting over someone, it's typical to start going out a lot. That might mean taking vacations or just spending a lot of time with friends. At any rate, when an ex starts spending time away from home, doing his or her own thing, it's definitely a sign that the relationship may be done for good.

7. New Hobbies

Another one of the big signs that your ex is over you involves picking up new hobbies. Anyone who's gone through a breakup knows how important it is to stay distracted and engaged in new activities. This can be a sign that your ex is ready to move on.

8. New Clothes

A new shirt here or there doesn't necessarily mean anything. I don't know about you, though, but when I used to go through serious breakups, I had a tendency to get rid of the things that really reminded me of my ex – including clothes. Remember what Rory Gilmore did after breaking up with Dean for the first time? Look for signs like that.

9. The Flirt is Gone

Even though it's generally a bad idea, couples who have recently broken up but still talk tend to keep flirting with each other. It's an awkward kind of “we're broken up but still know everything about each other” dance. If he or she starts pulling back from that, it's definitely one of the signs your ex is over you. He or she may not feel comfortable being that flirty anymore.

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When a couple breaks up, it can be difficult to tell whether your ex is truly over you or not. One of the most telling signs that your ex is over you is when they stop flirting with you. Flirting is a way of showing that there is still a connection between two people, even when they are no longer together. If your ex stops flirting with you, it could be a sign that they are no longer interested in you romantically.

Another sign that your ex is over you is when they stop talking about the relationship. If your ex no longer brings up the relationship, it could mean that they have moved on. Additionally, if your ex stops talking about the future, this could be a sign that they are no longer interested in being with you.

It can also be a sign that your ex is over you if they start seeing someone new. When people are still interested in each other, they often stay single until they can figure out if the relationship can be salvaged. If your ex starts seeing someone new, it could mean that they have given up on the relationship and are ready to move on.

10. Breaks His Promise

If there are a couple of things he promised to help you with even after you have broken up, and he just bailed on those promises without saying anything, chances are that he no longer cares to impress you. It might have slipped his mind because he was occupied with others things or he intentionally tried to forget in order to leave the relationship in the past.

11. He's Rude

Some guys don't deal with breakups gracefully and end up being rude to their ex-girlfriends. So if you see him on the streets and he ignores you or says a nasty remark, it means he is really over the relationship and he is directly showing it without holding it back. If he is that type of guy, the break up might have been the best thing that happened to you!

12. He Asks for His Things Back

You see him walk over to you and you wonder if he wants to get back together, but instead he asks for his things back. This is a definite sign that he is not planning on rehashing the relationship and wants to tie the ends by not leaving anything between you. If that's the case, this is the chance for you to let go of the past and look forward to new things!

13. Withdrawal

Although some of the people try to stay in contact after breaking up, some decide to completely break off any communication. So if you feel like he disappeared from the face of the earth without letting you know, it means that he is taking time for himself for good. If he is initiating this 'no speaking, no seeing each other' relationship willingly between the two of you, unfortunately all of his feelings are in the past.

14. He Prefers His Friends over You

If his actions or he directly tells you that he completely prefers his friends over you then he is taking this break up seriously. Yes, it can mean that he is trying to get over you with the help of his friends but it also says that he wants to get over you and he is determined to make it happen.

15. Bad or No Communication

On the other hand, if you are on speaking terms but the communication is way too cold and terse, it's another sign that things are really over. If his answers during a conversation are brief and he dodges any talks that you try to initiate, take it as a hint that this is the demise of your relationship.

16. He Hopes to Stay Friends

If your guy peacefully tells you directly that he would just prefer to stay friends and date other people, it's an obvious sign that he is done with the relationship. He would love to remain friends but unfortunately anything further is out of the picture.

17. He Starts Dating

Lastly, the biggest sign is when your ex starts dating again. Even casual dating suggests that he or she is really trying to get past the relationship. Your ex may just be trying to forget you, but all the same, all signs point to the fact that the relationship is over.

You may recognize some of these signs your ex is over you, and if so, you have all my sympathy. I know how hard that can be. It doesn't mean that you won't be friends, that you still won't be in each other's lives, but for now it's probably best to just walk away. Some of the signs your ex is over you might be up for debate, but most of them are pretty concrete. Don't make things worse by trying to force something that's not there. What are some other signs your ex is over you?

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

So i have this ex we dated two years ago, although I should be over him, i am, it's just hard when he keeps popping up in my life! Espcially when he's in my classes. Part of me misses him, and part of me doesn't. I feel guilty sometimes that i broke up with him, but it was so long ago i was a different person. I guess I just miss the person he used to be, not what he is now, totally different! So help! What should I do? Just forget about and move on? lol maybe...

We were together for a few months….We met online + @ first, I wasn’t that into him as he was into me…. But, I kept talking to him, anyways…. We finally went on a date, which, went very well…. The next day, he was even nice enough to help out my mom + then afterwards, he introduced me to his mom and his stepdad…. He told his mom + stepdad a little bit about me already…. This was only the day after our first date…. We dated from then on…. He got along very well with my son, which, was very important to me…. He ate with my family sometimes…. My parents were into him…. This all happened in September…. On Halloween weekend, we made it official…. Things were really good between us…. We were so into each other…. Even on Thanksgiving, he once blurted out, “I love you” ,but then said he wasn’t sure…. I chose to not think any of that because we had became official + had been drinking…. Things resumed to being good…. He was even a little concerned when my ex, the father of my son, came into town from out of state to stay with my family for a few days….He @ one point said it was killing that there were was some other dude staying @ my home…. But, then after my ex left, things were still good…. Then, there was this time where he said would be going to a Christmas work party and assumed he wanted me to go with him because when we 1st started dating he had already asked me to go to this particular party with him…. But, when it came closer to the day of the party, he was unsure on whether he could even bring someone + then when he found out he could, he said the issue was whether he would have got off work early enough to be able to pick me up + go to the party…. Then, when I came up with a solution where I said I could just meet him @ the party then he said he had thought about it + decided to go solo…. Then, I got real upset + even cried about it…. I should have let it go…. Then, I tried bringing up the issue again after a few days…. Then, on the same week, a few days before Christmas, he told me @ times, he wants a girlfriend and other times, he doesn’t…. But, he said he still liked me a lot + my family + still wanted to see me…. But, just not be committed…. I cried that same night + didn’t call him @ all the next day…. But, on that same day, I received a text from him telling me he missed + was thinking about me…. Then, he came over for a bit + even ate with my parents…. I asked his day went + he said it felt weird cuz I guess we broke up…. Then, from that day on, he still considered me his girlfriend and still exclusively dating…. But, still didn’t want to be committed fully…. For a week and a half, things were wonderful like we just started dating…. I didn’t contact him until initiated first…. And, he did…. Then, for New Years, he said he was going to school reunion by himself…. Learning from the Christmas party incident, I told him I wasn’t upset that he wanted to go by himself + would be okay if a girl ended up kissing him as long as he didn’t initiate it + didn’t feel anything for her because it’s a tradition on NYE to give kisses…. But, on NYE, he decided to not go + ended up coming over to my house…. He said he decided he wanted to spend NYE with me…. I asked if he missed us being together…. He said he did + really wanted to be with me, but he just wanted me to make positive changes to my life as in getting my license, get a good job, and have a better relationship with my parents…. I promised him I would and asked him to be my boyfriend again…. He accepted…. Things were good from then on…. But, then the thing that was bothering me a little that he wouldn’t put that we’re in a relationship on his FB…. I thought it was kinda odd because when we 1st got together, he put “in a relationship” the day after we made it official + the day after we 1st broke up, he changed it back to “single.” So, I asked him a few times to please change his status and said he would when we felt like it…. I realize now, I shouldn’t have made a fuss about it…. Then, within half a week later, he told me he didn’t want to be committed to any one…. He wanted to be able to see other chicks…. And, if I had a license and a job then maybe things would be different…. But, what kinda baffled was that just a week before he dumped me, he was telling me he wanted to build a future together and would be happy to spend the rest of his life with me, but only after I learned how to drive + got a good job…. It’s been almost 2 weeks since we broke up, I’ve done the thing where I would call + text him @ least once a week…. He answered me + talked for a little bit…. But, with the exception of one time, he has never initiated contact with me…. I asked if he ever thinks or misses me and says from time to time, he does like how I am doing + how my son is…. But, he doesn’t call or text because he doesn’t want to lead me on into thinking there is something more…. I know he is flirting with other chicks cuz he is a dude, but so am I…. It’s inevitable….But, I know I only still want to be with him…. I have this belief that even if a guy may have feelings for his ex that he still would hook up or talk to other chicks, just to maybe get his mind off + got his needs…. As much as I don’t want him to be hooking up with others, I think this is what needs to happen before as in one being with others before we get back together, if its meant to happen…. When, I consult a few of my friends about this, they tell me to forget him because if he really wanted to be with me he would still want to be with despite the fact that I didn’t drive or have a job…. While, a few others agree with me that’s what I gotta do whatever it takes to get him back, which, is learn how to drive + get a job…. I am not just doing it all for him…. I am 28 years old + should have taken care of this shit years ago, especially for my son…. But, now, he’s a bigger incentive…. Anyways, I had thought about writing that letter to him, but I think it’s too soon…. As of last week, we had just gotten to the point where we are getting along really well + established that we be friends with benefits…. Before that, it would be awkward whenever we tried to talk or hang out…. I actually had thought about writing a letter to him before I saw this web site because I remembered @ one point when we were 1st together, he told me he actually wanted me to hand-write a love letter to him…. And, if I had sent that letter saying I had moved on now, wouldn’t it make him think that I am trying to get a reaction out of him? Plus, I am not accomplishing the things I should be doing, which is getting my license, getting a job, or seeing other dudes…. I am just focusing full time on getting a good GPA in school + taking care of my son…. So, speed up to what’s happening now, as of last week, my ex and I decided to be friends with benefits with the option of hooking up with others, as long as we;’re honest with each other. He told he hooked up with other chicks, but only making out. But, we have fucked a couple of times. He says he wants to hang/miss me (more as a person) from time to time. But, he doesn’t initiate hanging out much because he knows I got my son + school. My friend thinks he he could have feelings for me deep down, but still wants to see me some time as in thats why he let me initiate hanging out. But, he told me he just doesn’t want to commit to any one right now. When we hang out, after we fuck, he spoons with me to the point where he takes my legs hostage with his. He even initiated the spooning when usually I am the one who does that. He gives me lingering hugs when we hang out. Then on Valentine’s Day, I happened to tell him I was having drinks with a guy, then while texting the next day, he asked me, “Did you hook up with me? Plz be honest”.When I told him about my plans the day before + didn’t reply back, he just that I thought he didn’t care cuz he said he would never ask if I hooked up with any one cuz then he’d care + if he did then he would be with me. My gal friends say he he may have mix feelings for me bnut won’t admit.he always thinking not to lead me on but at the same time completely.Mix feelings as in he’;s sleeping with me + seien other gals but seems comfy with me because he has been with me since.Then, on the day before we hooked uip, he asked if I was @ school because he was thinking of “kidnapping’+ taking me back to his place even to just fuck. i thought it was cute though cuz he usually does initiate hanging out. Then, on Saturday night, I came oveer to stay over. We did play a game + watched a movie + fucked a little.We cuddled for a bit in bed + this morning after he woke up…. But, what’s funny last night was that he had some crazy nightmare that we were both sleeping in another room @ his place when Freddy Krueger came in + tried to kill both of us…. He said, Freddy killed me 1st, like throwing against the wall….I asked how did it make him him feel when seeing me die in that dream. He said he was petrified, but I didn’t ask if it was because if it was cuz seeing me die or the fact that Freddy Krueger came + tried to kill us. But, it’s odd that I was in his dream when I was sleeping right next to him. You think I was in his dream cuz maybe he subconsciously cares or have feelings for me? My gal says, “He thinks a lot about you and dream about you hehe. Crazy dream though lol. You know they say that if you think alot of someone or something you dream of them constantly.Then, i keep wondering if he has made out with other gals, why he hasn’t fucked them when he could cuz he’s single? then, my other gal says cuz he’s getting it from me which is a good start. Right now, I am not sad that we’re not together.. As long as we’re hooking up + stay honest with each other about hooking up with others. But, then my gal says he could be testing to see if I would fuck other dudes. I don’t want to fuck any one else, but him. But, if he fucks someone else then I’ll **** someone else. And, I am always the one who calls or texts him first. But, my instincts he has still feelings for me + confused, but won’t admit to me cuz he doesn’t want to lead me on + still wants to have fun in his life. But, what happens if he just ends up just fucking me? My plan is to be friends with benefits with him so he can see I’ll be there for him through thick + thin until I get my shit together then pursue him after we have our time being with other people­­. So, I was talking with my close gal friend who suggested that @ least for week, I should not contact him @ all because it seems like he has feelings for me + would contact me within this week…. But, so far he hasn’t…. It’s been only a few days…. But, I think it would take him more than a week to contact me 1st…. He has a busy job, working 6 out 7 days a week + still get work-related calls after he’s off…. From what I gather when we were still in contact, he’d just been chillin + playing video games…. He does go to sleep early a lot of times…. So, I am hoping to god, that he will contact me…. I am gonna give it like 2 weeks + then contact him because I am still think it’s too early to write that letter to him…. If I were to follow these rules on this page, should I wait until i see how this friends with benefits goes or should I let time pass before I put this strategy to help? I NEED INPUT ASAP! P.S. I am his only booty call.... I know I shouldn't be sleeping with him.... This won't go on forever.... I will cut fwb ties eventually.... But, doesn't that say something if he doesn't want to fuck or hook up with any one else besides me?

My ex has shown 3 of the signs but I think hes a confused bisexual. He's with a controlling gay man and has been acting like hes interested and nowb I've been blocked because of this control freak

All I know is that even though some of this has happened already, it 100% doesn't fully apply to my situation. I'm the one that left my ex, I'm the one that broke up with him. He is the one suggesting trying to be friends and then saying lets go from there and if things work out we could try again. I'm also encouraging him to go out an date and sleep with other women. Even though I love him deeply and with all my heart and he feels the same way about me, he is in the rebound stages and I know all rebounds don't last. So I'm okay with that. I'm actually more okay with him banging the girls because it won't mean anything. Sex without emotions, he is very good with. I am as well. So being selfless at this point in time is all I can do right now. i have to work on myself an ehe has to work on himself too. The fact that he never grieved the death of his father last year is a huge reason that has added to the toll of him not taking care of his health. He has type 2 diabetes and depression, which the latte the was diagnosed in September. He just needs to finally follow through on staying with the medication and going to the psychiatrist. Plus the fact that we both wanted to get married to each other and have children, is another reason why this is very hard for the two of us. He'll always be the greats love of my life, my soul mate, well actually more so my twin soul. The only man i've ever given my entire heart to and let all my walls down with. He was like my best friend, not just my boyfriend.

idk if my ex still loves me? we do everything together- hang out with eachothers families, go to dinner, text all day. why?

Idk if my boyfriend is over me tbh he's dating his other ex again but he always looks at me plus he does talk shit about me like I'm low self esteem and a dumbass idk like he is in a secret relationship now which is pretty sad cuz we was like that but couldn't last long plus he is so bitter idk I kinda want him back but don't help me plz

I have just come out of a horrible relationship and I know I am young but he was horrible to me and then I finally just had the courage to come out of it and I finally stood up for myself

So I was trying to look for an advice section and you ladies don't seem to have one...so if this goes out, it goes out. My Ex & I were in a relationship on & off for 2 1/2 years. There was alot of complication and it was far from easy to say the least, which included the fact he was shy to speak in English. Long story short he being hispanic was made fun of when he was younger for speaking in English which has led to a life long phobia if you can call it that to speaking in english, even to me. Well it's been 1 1/2 yrs since we offically broke up for the last time & from what I had thought would be the final time. I let him go so maybe he would find peace within himself for some of our issues. Since the breakup he has still wanted me in his life at the very least as a friend, nothing else. It has been hard to let go of him, but just recently all of the hurt and anger that I harbored finally was set free without me realizing it, I simply didn't care anymore. So recently he wanted to get together for coffee and talk. I'm not sure why, but when I asked he wouldn't say why. Before we officially got together we were in each other's lives and I was the "best friend" he'd come to me about things, and now I feel he wants to go back to where we were before we got together, which I cannot do, for the fact I am not who I used to be, I don't want to go back, and seeing him and being around him I simply have the hardest time doing. It sounds like I'm contradicting but even though I have let him go, I'm simply not ready to be friends yet. So my question is - how do I explain that in a very nice way, without coming off sounding like a complete jaded b*tch? I'd really like to know, for as much as I have grown stronger since our breakup I really don't know how to do this, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

i want my ex boyfriend back but he wont talk to me