Making the decision to overlook faults in your partner is one you will be thankful that you made. It is not an easy decision. It is much easier to see the negative than the positive, especially when a certain fault really bothers you. But there are many advantages for you and your relationship when you choose to overlook faults in your partner.
Snapshot Survey
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Please subscribe for your personalized newsletter:
1. What You Focus on Grows
What you focus on grows which is why you should choose to overlook faults in your partner. It really is true. If you choose to focus on all of the wonderful qualities that your partner has, you will find that you are feeling much more positive about them and even more in love. On the flip side, if you focus on all of their faults you probably will not feel positive about them much longer. You will begin seeing more and more faults and feeling more negative about your relationship.
***
Acknowledging the strengths and virtues of your partner, rather than honing in on their imperfections, can truly transform your relationship. By practicing gratitude for their positive attributes, you're actively creating an environment of appreciation and respect. This mindset fosters the conditions for love to flourish and deepens the emotional connection. Consider the power of positive reinforcement; when you express admiration for your partner's good actions, it encourages more of the same behavior. The energy you invest in focusing on the good can lead to a symbiotic cycle of love and respect.
2. You Have Faults Too
Another reason you should overlook faults in your partner is that you have them, too. It is wise to remember that you are not perfect. When I get aggravated with my husband, I remind myself of all the things he puts up with living with imperfect me. If I want him to extend grace to me, then I should do the same to him. Extending grace contributes to a happier relationship.
***
Recognizing your own imperfections helps to cultivate a sense of empathy and understanding towards your partner. When those little quirks or slip-ups emerge, take a deep breath and reflect on your own shortcomings. By embracing humility and practicing forgiveness, you foster a nurturing environment where both you and your partner can grow and improve together. After all, love isn't about finding a perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Embrace this mindset, and watch as it transforms your relationship into a stronger, more resilient partnership.
Frequently asked questions
3. You Love Them
If you love your partner, that should be motivation to overlook their faults. You don’t want to hurt the person that you love the most. Of course, there are times when you have to confront your partner about issues but even then, you should do so lovingly. But for little everyday things like forgetting to turn the lights off when leaving a room or some other trivial thing, it is best to overlook it. Remember, true love is blind.
***
Real love transcends petty grievances; it sees beyond the surface to cherish the essence of who your partner truly is. That's not to say concerns should be ignored completely—but when love runs deep, you find the strength to approach difficulties with compassion and understanding, rather than criticism. In the grand scheme of a relationship, these small imperfections often become endearing quirks that add to the uniqueness of your bond. Always focus on nurturing the love and connection you share, for that is the fertile ground from which forgiveness and patience naturally grow.
4. It is Healthier for Your Relationship
Picking at every little thing in each other is not good for your relationship. In fact, it can absolutely tear it to shreds. When you are tempted to fuss at your partner about a fault, ask yourself if it is worth the risk of damage to your relationship. Sometimes it will be. But other times mentioning it would be absolutely unnecessary.
***
Fostering an environment of acceptance and understanding can significantly strengthen the bond between partners. Regularly expressing appreciation for all the good in your relationship while acknowledging each other's imperfections with grace can create a powerful and deep connection. Remember, focusing on a partner's positive qualities encourages a cycle of love and respect, which is essential for a healthy, long-lasting partnership. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is let the small things slide and choose your battles wisely for the sake of harmony and unity.
5. It is Best to Pick Your Battles
You are obviously going to have confrontations when you are in a long term relationship with someone. But you don’t have to have them constantly. Decide which things are worth confronting and which are not. A good gauge to use is deciding if the fault is something trivial or maybe something that is a habit of your spouse. If it is, you would be wise to let it go. However, if it is something that is causing you hurt and issues between the two of you, it needs to be addressed.
***
Relationships thrive on compromise and understanding. Consider the long-term effects of what bothers you. Will this matter in a year or five years? If it's unlikely to affect the foundation of your partnership, perhaps it's not worth the argument. Constant nitpicking can lead to resentment. Instead, save your energy for issues that truly impact the health and happiness of your relationship. Remember, choosing your battles wisely often leads to a more peaceful and fulfilling union.
6. Do Unto Others
A good philosophy to go by is to do unto others as you would like to them to do unto you. Maybe your partner is just having a bad day. We all have bad days. Try to focus on how willing they are to be understanding with you when you are having a bad day. Of course you should never put up with being mistreated but everyone can overlook some small things.
7. You Are Encouraging Good Behaviors
When you don’t focus on your partner’s faults and instead choose to focus on all of their positive traits, it will make them more likely to display them. After all, if we know someone thinks we are polite or kindhearted then we don’t want to disappoint them by not being that way, do we? We want to measure up to what someone’s expectations are of us. Make a choice to brag on your partner’s good behaviors instead of fussing about their bad ones. Many of their faults may simply disappear.
This is an important topic we all can learn from. What helps you to overlook your partner’s faults? How do you stay positive?
Comments
Shannon: Guilty
Katie: I suggest every couple should read the book Love and Respect. It\'s amazing and so insightful.
Alison: Loved this article
Riseoflight: I don\'t judge my boyfriend at all. He\'s perfect in my eyes in every way I can think of.
Kate: It\'s really hard sometimes when it seems like all they do is point out yours
Elle1225: This is very nice
Joanne: It is really hard when they point out everything that you do wrong, and when you try to tell them that they do the same things they accuse you of being defensive.
Tia: I love the advice given in this post. It is all so true.
:
Feedback Junction
Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge