Are you worried that you’re not going to be able to see the signs he’s a player ? That has got to be pretty frustrating. Well, worry no more! This article should give you a few of my best tricks to tell if your guy (or want-to-be-guy) is really into you, or he’s just playing with your emotions. So here are my top 7 signs he’s a player!
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1. He Never Calls
Most people would rather text than call nowadays, but that special someone should want to call to hear your voice! If he doesn’t call very often, that’s one of the bad signs he’s a player. If he makes excuses via text like “I’m busy” all the time, then he doesn’t really care about communication -- and communication is key. If he’s careless with that, there may be some other lady he’s not calling too.
2. Lack of Transparency
If he’s not clear with his intentions, then that shows that he has a lack of respect for you. Not only that, but he also doesn’t value that in you either. It doesn’t matter whether he wants to be your friend, friend with benefits, boyfriend, or date, he should always let you know what your relationship to him is. If he doesn’t, then it’s safe to assume he’s playing games that you might not want to willingly participate in.
Transparency is fundamental in any relationship, and if he's avoiding defining what you are, it's a major red flag. Communication is the bedrock of trust, and without it, you're building on shaky ground. If he's elusive whenever you try to understand where you stand or what you mean to each other, consider that a warning sign. A man who's sincerely interested in you will be upfront, and if he's not, you may unfortunately be just another pawn in his game. It's crucial to align your expectations to avoid emotional turmoil down the line.
Frequently asked questions
If he only messages sporadically, avoids deep conversations, or keeps things flirty without any commitment, he might be playing you. Trust your gut—if something feels off, it probably is.
Look out for excessive use of flirty emojis, inconsistent responses, avoiding plans to meet up, and keeping conversations shallow. Players often text multiple people at once and avoid serious topics.
If he's taking longer than usual to reply, he might be juggling other conversations or not prioritizing you. It’s a red flag if he only responds when it's convenient for him.
Absolutely! You deserve clarity and respect. If he’s not willing to be straightforward or gets defensive, it’s another sign he might be a player. Always prioritize your feelings and well-being.
Players tend to keep things light and avoid future talk because they're not looking for anything serious. If he's dodging every attempt at discussing the future, he might not see you as a long-term partner.
3. Obvious Flirting
I believe that a little bit of flirting is healthy for a relationship. But, when he goes overboard, and it borders on glaring, it becomes a pretty big problem. He should be courteous enough to keep it within boundaries and not upset you in the process. If he gets defensive or angry, then he obviously doesn’t care about you or your feelings to consider the reason you were mad in the first place.
When it comes to relationships, it's important to be aware of the signs that a man could be a player. One of the most obvious signs is if he is overly flirtatious. Flirting can be a healthy part of a relationship, but when it becomes excessive and borders on glaring, it can be a problem. If a man is constantly flirting with other women, even when you are present, it could be a sign that he is not taking the relationship seriously.
In addition to being overly flirtatious, a player may also be overly charming and complimentary. He may also give you lavish gifts and compliments that seem too good to be true. These can be signs that he is trying to manipulate you into staying in the relationship.
Another sign of a player is if he is constantly trying to push the boundaries. He may be trying to get physical with you before you are ready or he may be pressuring you to do things that make you uncomfortable. A player may also be dismissive of your feelings and get defensive or angry when you try to talk about your concerns.
4. PDA
Does he like showing affection in public? I’m not talking about the making out kind, but the kind where he holds your hand, or gives you a peck on the check. If he doesn’t want people to see you guys together that way, chances are, he has been or might be doing the same thing with someone else.
Public displays of affection are telling of how a person values and perceives their relationship when in the eye of society. While a quick hug or holding hands is innocuous, a man avoiding any form of affection could be indicating that he's keeping his options open, shielding his status as single to attract or maintain attention from potential prospects. It's important to observe if this behavior is consistent or situational, as it could reveal whether you're a treasured partner or merely an option in his rotation. Keep an eye out for discomfort or evasion—it's often where the truth lies.
5. Any Pictures Together ?
Are there pictures of you two on Twitter? Facebook? Instagram? If he refuses to put up pictures on social websites while you are constantly uploading the cutest pic, it shows that you guys have a different view of your relationship. He might think it’s a casual thing, while you’ve put your heart out there. He might even be brushing off your relationship altogether!
6. Lots of Female Friends
If he’s popular with the ladies, he’s probably handsome, charming, and he knows it. He may use this to become friends with the ladies, and maybe something more. Who knows if he is truthful about what he does with those friends.
Possessing a circle of female admirers can often be a red flag. He navigates through these friendships with ease, blurring the lines between platonic and romantic with a charming smile. Be vigilant, as he might relish the attention and keep his options open, weaving through these relationships with a grace that leads to suspicion. His ability to maintain such connections speaks volumes about his social skills, yet it raises questions about his intentions and loyalty. Trust your intuition and look for consistency in his words and actions.
7. Words and No Action
He always knows the right thing to say, even when the problem you guys might be having is him ! If he always knows what to say in order to get you to forgive him, he may in fact be playing you. He knows what you want to hear and is using that to his advantage! So, if he says sweet nothings, and doesn't follow through, chances are, they are just words that make him look good.
Empty promises and honeyed phrases are his specialty, it seems. But remember, actions speak louder than words. Consistently failing to deliver on his assurances is a major red flag that he's not taking the relationship as seriously as you are. The charm offensive might be intoxicating initially, but it only serves to mask a lack of genuine commitment and interest. It's essential to watch what he does, not just what he professes. If his grand gestures end at mere talk, you're likely dealing with a player who's adept at the game of deceit.
8. Doesn't Try to Understand You
When you are dating a guy, should he want to know something about you? Shouldn't he try to understand your moods, your thoughts, how you feel and what makes you tick? If that isn't the case with this guy, not only is he treating you like crap, but he could be a player!
9. He Poses as Single on Dating Websites
How about this one girls, have you ever run up against something like this? The guy that you are seeing -- you may have met through online (which is nothing to sneeze at, I met Lyndsie online!) but a few months later and after more than a few dates -- you happen to run across his profile as still single? How horrible is that?
If you stumble upon his online dating profile claiming singlehood when you have been sharing sweet nothings and planning future dates, you've got to raise an eyebrow. This type of behavior is a giant red flag; it means he's on the prowl while you're knitting dreams around him. Trust me, angel, you’re probably not the only one he's whispering sweet affirmations to at night. It's time to confront him or reconsider whether this is a man you can truly trust with your heart.
10. His Facebook is Hidden from You
Ah, the old Facebook trick -- it's hidden from you. Are you able to post on his wall? What about any posts that he has on his wall ... can you see them? Trust, if you can't, he probably has his reasons!
If you find that his profile is a mysterious void when it comes to you, alarm bells should ring loud and clear. This is a classic move for someone trying to avoid being tagged in compromising photos that suggest exclusivity or, worse, expose them to the scrutiny of the other women they may be entertaining. Think about it: When he's more concerned with controlling his online narrative than openly sharing his life with you, you're likely not the only one he's trying to keep in the dark. It's a digital dance of deceit, and you deserve a partner who's an open book.
11. Constant Text Messages from Other Girls
While he might get text messages from other people, are a lot of them girls? Do you get to see any of them? That could be one of the signs that he is playing with you!
12. Always Busy
While you don't need to be with him all of the time, do you constantly find that he is busy? Do you think that he is busy dating other people? Talk to him about it and see what he's doing when he's busy -- that way you can put your mind at ease!
Being perpetually shrouded in busyness may be a red flag that he's not fully investing in your relationship. It's important to distinguish between a genuinely packed schedule and excuses that mask his lack of commitment. If conversations about his whereabouts lead to vague responses or change the subject, trust your instincts. A partner who values you will make time for you, so take note if he's allocating his time elsewhere. A healthy relationship is built on transparency, so if he's unwilling to provide that, it might be time to reassess his intentions.
13. Not Parent Material
Finally, there are some guys that just aren't parent material, they have that bad boy quality in them and typically, they don't care about meeting your parents either. If your guy isn't into meeting your parents at all -- it could be a sign that he's just toying with you!
Ladies, you always have to be careful when it seems like your guy might be playing childish games with you. You have to decide if you want to go down that route, or leave it alone altogether. Either way, I hope these signs he’s a player will help you decipher him, and what the next step will be in your relationship. What signs tell you that he’s a player?
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