We all know there are some things men will never tell you. There’s a reason why women are known as the more communicative and emotional sex, and many men don’t know where to start when it comes to expressing themselves properly using words. Whilst there are undoubtedly some men out there who are good at speaking about their emotions, there are still some things men will never tell you.
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1. They Miss You
If you’re lucky enough to have a boyfriend who is always texting you that he misses you – you’re very lucky indeed! Saying ‘I miss you’ is one of the things men will never tell you; or they’ll say it rarely. For some men, an admission that they miss you and want to see you is a sign of dependency and weakness, and if they want to keep the upper hand in the relationship, they’ll keep their distance when it comes to displaying their emotions. Luckily, you can sometimes get your man to open up by being the one to initiate the ‘I miss you’ conversation – hopefully, he’ll take the hint!
2. They Don’t Always Enjoy Boy’s Nights out
If your man has been going on about heading off on a boy’s night out, you might be thinking it will be a booze-filled night of chatting to other women, dancing, and generally mucking around with his friends. In fact, it could just be that he wants a bit of chill out time to catch up with his mates. I know whenever my boyfriend goes out he doesn’t always have a good time – sometimes he misses me and would rather be cozied up watching a film together or enjoying dinner at a nice restaurant. So don’t assume that just because your man is out with his friends, he’s having more fun than when he’s with you, and leave him to have his boy time!
Frequently asked questions
Sometimes, guys don't express their feelings because they're afraid of appearing too vulnerable. It could be pride or they just don't know how to put it into words.
Absolutely! Just like anyone else, men appreciate knowing they're missed. It makes them feel valued and special, even if they might not show it openly.
He might send you random texts, try to call you, or find excuses to see you. Little actions, like reminiscing about past moments, can be big indicators too.
Sometimes, a guy might say he doesn't miss you to protect himself from getting hurt, or maybe he's trying to push you away for personal reasons. It's not always easy to understand, but it doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't care.
Being honest is the best approach. Tell them in a straightforward manner, maybe start with something simple like, 'I really miss you,' or 'I've been thinking a lot about you.' It doesn't have to be perfect, just genuine.
3. You Always Look Beautiful
Ok, so some men are really, really good at giving compliments. I’ve been with one, and the rest have sucked at ever complimenting me! Sometimes, the time you most need to hear that you look beautiful isn’t when you’ve spent three hours doing your makeup for a special event. It’s when you’ve just rolled out of bed in the morning, or when you’re sick and haven’t bothered to brush your hair. A man who can tell you that you look beautiful at these times is a keeper ladies, so don’t let him get away!
4. They’re Afraid of Being Alone
I used to think that it was just women who got afraid of growing old alone. With so many of my friends in their 20’s and early 30’s getting married, it was always something at the back of my mind. It was only recently, when chatting with my boyfriend, that I realised men have the same fears! It makes sense, after all, we’re all human. Nobody likes the idea of being old and alone, so don’t think that just because men don’t always express how they’re feeling, they don’t feel the same things we do!
5. You’re Scary when You Have PMT
Sensible men know better than to try and engage you with any kind of meaningful conversation when you have PMT. They also know never to tell you that you’re irrational, scary, overemotional or any of these things, if they want to live! But you know you can be a bit scary sometimes, whether you cry more often than usual or just become irrationally moody at your boyfriend over the slightest things. Sometimes I wonder how men put up with our monthly moods, then I remember that my other half has PMT-like moods on and off throughout most of the month, and I don’t feel quite so guilty!
6. They’re Jealous of Your Guy-friends
Many men don’t like to show weakness, and for some guys, that includes signs of jealousy. If they show they’re jealous, they’re revealing their insecurity to you. Whilst some men can be overly jealous and possessive, there are others who won’t express how they feel. You might think he doesn’t care that you’re at the bar with your guy-friends every Friday night, but in reality, he could just be keeping the peace or afraid to bring the subject up. The chances are, he’s jealous, even if it’s just a teeny-weeny bit!
Some guys might resort to subtle hints or questions about these friendships, testing the waters before admitting their true feelings. It's their way of protecting their ego, just like they'd rather walk on a broken foot than ask for directions. Perhaps it's the way you light up when mentioning your latest adventure with the boys, or maybe there's a specific friend he's particularly wary of. Whatever the case, pay attention to the unspoken cues and the covert glances—they’re often louder than words.
7. They Worry They Haven’t Got It All Figured out Yet
I’m sure many of us spend time worrying about where we are in life – we feel like we should have it all figured out by now and be on the path to happiness. Men are no different; they have the same worries as we do, and whilst they often won’t talk about it, that doesn’t mean they don’t feel the same! Men can be more immature than women, which means they often take longer to figure out what they want and where they want to go in life. It’s not unusual for a man in his 30s or evens his 40s to still not know where he’s headed. It’s good to know that we’re not the only ones!
8. They Want to Feel like a Man
Maybe he insists on paying for all your meals. Maybe he wants to be the one to put together your new closet. Either way, he's just trying to take care of you, because he thinks that it's what a man is supposed to do. There's no harm in letting him feel masculine. He needs it.
9. They Prefer when You're Blunt
Men hate when you play mind games with them. When you tell him that you're "fine" when you're actually angry at him, he won't know what to do. He'll waste his whole day trying to figure out what he did wrong, but he probably won't be successful. He'd rather you straight out tell him why he's an idiot so he can fix things and make you happy again.
10. They Hate Your Exes
It doesn't matter if he's never met them before in his life. He hates your exes. He doesn't want to see them, he doesn't want to hear about them. The only thing he wants to know is that he makes you happier than any of your exes ever did.
This visceral reaction is more than just jealousy—it’s a declaration of territory and a deep-seated need to be your one and only. The way his eyes narrow when your ex's name pops up on your phone or the speed at which he changes the subject when past romances are mentioned—all subtle clues of his emotional investment. And let’s be real, as flattering as it might be, it can get exhausting. But remember, it’s all because in his eyes, you deserve the world—and no one else in it should have what's his.
11. They Want You to Be Quiet
Most of the time, your man will love hearing your beautiful voice. However, there are times when he'll just wish you would be quiet. If he's trying to watch a big game, and responds to everything you say with "mhm," then he's probably not listening. He just wants you to get everything out so you'll shut up and he can watch television.
12. They Notice the Small Things
We assume that our boyfriends will never notice our new haircut or our new scent of perfume. However, they're more observant than you'd think. If you're important to him, then he'll probably notice that you did something differently, even if he can't quite pinpoint what it is.
13. They Look at Other Women
If a pretty woman walks past him, he's going to look at her. Even though he'll find her attractive, it doesn't mean that he wants to leave you for her. If he wanted someone else, then he wouldn't agree to be your boyfriend, so don't get too jealous.
14. They Want You around
If your man invites you out with his buddies, don't turn down the invitation because you're assuming he's only asking to be nice. If he didn't want you there, he wouldn't ask. If he really cares about you, he'll want you around as often as possible, so don't keep turning down his invitations.
15. They Love Skimpy Outfits
If your man really loves you, he'll think that you look gorgeous in anything, even sweatpants and a turtleneck. However, that doesn't mean that he always wants you covered up. Men love to look at women, so he'll be at his happiest when you're showing some skin. You don't have to be half-naked, but he prefers when you flaunt that body.
16. They Try Their Best
When your boyfriend gives you socks for Christmas, you'll assume that he didn't even try to get you something special. However, most men just don't know what will make you happy. It might've taken him weeks to come up with the idea of getting socks, so don't assume that he doesn't care about you. He's trying his best.
17. They Brag about You
Your man might not mention the fact that he brags about you to all his friends, but he definitely does it. I mean, why wouldn't he want to tell everyone about the beautiful girl he's dating? Even though you don't realize it, he's always saying great things about you.
18. They Love Compliments
We're not the only ones who love being called gorgeous. Make sure that you remind your man that he's attractive whenever you get the chance. He might brush off the compliment or seemingly ignore it, but trust me, he's happy to hear it. He needs his confidence boosted, too.
19. They Get Emotional
Men get emotional, too, you know. Society teaches boys that it's not masculine to cry, so they might avoid doing it in front of you, but that doesn't mean that they've never shed some tears. So if your man gets weepy over the end of a movie, don't tease him about it. You should be happy that he's comfortable enough with you to show his emotions.
You’ll always get men who are better at expressing their emotions than others, but just because he doesn’t tell you something, doesn’t mean he isn’t feeling it. Take the time to get to know the men in your life and you’ll be able to sense how they’re feeling without them ever having to tell you! Is your man an openly emotional type or does he hide his feelings away?
This article was written in collaboration with editor Holly Riordan.
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