Marriage may seem pretty straight-forward, but many women are embracing several alternatives to traditional marriage. The traditional couple getting married and settling down isn't right for everyone. After all, if you're happy together, that's all that truly matters. If regular marriage isn't right for you, you might want to consider one of these alternatives to traditional marriage.
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1. Living Together
By far, one of the most popular alternatives to traditional marriage is to simply live together. I see marriage as being a commitment two people make to each other. Choosing to live together and commit to each other is really no different. Many previously married individuals opt for this alternative because marriage didn't work for them in the past. Others just enjoy skipping the hoopla of a big ceremony.
2. Long Distance Relationship
I know this is a deal breaker for many, but some couples have no problem embracing a long distance relationship. The key to success is trust. Whether you're married or not, living apart and not being able to see each other for weeks or months at a time is hard. Military couples do it all the time. Others are finding it works great for them as well, especially when jobs are located hundreds of miles apart.
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3. The Bread Winner Wife
In today's society, it's not all about the man bringing home the bacon and the wife staying home with the kids. In fact, many marriages now reverse those roles. Stay at home dads are more common than ever. To me, a couple should work out the roles they play for the best of the marriage, kids and themselves. It's always kind of sweet to see a guy cooking dinner and changing dirty diapers.
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This shift in domestic dynamics reflects a progressive mindset where gender norms are fluid and the notion of providing is not tied to one's sex. Couples are defining success in terms that resonate with their personal values and situations. Having a female breadwinner often means that financial flexibility and career choices are re-evaluated for the benefit of the household's overall well-being. It's a supportive, egalitarian approach to partnership, where both partners share responsibilities and strengths in a way that nurtures family growth and individual satisfaction.
4. Just Friends
Many people say their spouse is their best friend. Some women have decided to fully embrace that and marry for friendship instead of romantic love. While love-making may or may not be a priority, these couples are often extremely happy. They each are free to go off with other friends and when they come home, it's to someone they truly enjoy being around. Basically, it's a roommate that you trust completely.
5. Multiple Marriages
While traditional vows say “til death do you part,” many women have discovered couples often grow apart. The person you're compatible with now may very well change several years later. Instead of forcing themselves to spend their lives in a miserable situation, they divorce and remarry later. Multiple marriages are nothing unusual and they help people stay happy throughout their lives.
6. Gay Marriage
While it's still highly controversial, gay marriage really isn't any different than traditional marriage. Still, for women who don't have a supportive family, it may be hard to consider marrying another woman, no matter how much they love each other. The fact is, marriage means being with the one you love. Gay or straight, it doesn't matter.
7. Marriage of Convenience
Marriage isn't always about love. In fact, it's often about convenience. From health benefits to a better living situation, some women marry to make life easier on themselves and the person they marry. For instance, a guy may get married because he needs a stable babysitter for his daughter. The couple are close friends, but they're not in love.
8. Open Marriage
I guess this is one of the hardest for me to understand. After all, why get married at all if both of you want to be with other people? Still, this alternative works for some couples. The key is communication and letting the other know who you're with. For these couples, it's not cheating because they're honest with each other and don't form romantic attachments to anyone else they're with. I suppose you'd call this a marriage with side benefits.
9. Polygamous Marriage
Sometimes it's hard to find just one person. Polygamous marriages aren't nearly as taboo as they used to be. Usually women in these marriages start out traditionally. The couple then decides to marry another man or woman or both. It's kind of a play on open marriage, except with a commitment.
As you can see, marriage isn't quite as black and white as we've been led to believe. If tradition is right for you, do what makes you and your partner happy. You have plenty of options to choose from. Have you ever embraced any non-traditional marriage alternatives?
Comments
Sarah: I completely agree with Monique and sheldave. Marriage comes from God.
Sabrina: what ever happened to marriage being about love???
Isabella: interesting read this was.. we are all human and marriage means something to everyone, it's just different in everyone's opinion. if people can't accept gay marriage, you need to open your mind a bit. we're all human and we deserve happiness, i think. same with open/polygamous marriage, most of us might not agree with it but that works for some people. i think we need to stop being so judgemental and be open to perspectives!
Phyllis: That's disgusting. What happened to marrying your best friend and actually want to make love to?? That's so disturbing. The sad part is there's a ton of marriages out there like that!
sheldave: All of these make me sick!! marriage is a beautiful union between a woman and man💜
dani13: this is disgusting
Samantha: I say as long as they love, respect and trust one another and all are on the same page than who am I or anyone to judge others on what they see as marriage.... Plus I'm an out & proud lesbian myself and can't wait to marry the woman of my dreams someday...:)
drjgelb: So much conservative angst at the mere mention of alternatives.....marriage as we know it today is only about 200yrs old in the West! Prior to that, arranged marriages were the rule, with exceptions only for the highest elites and then only in exceptional circumstances. Having marriageable children was considered an asset belonging to the male head of the family. He managed that asset for the good of the family, often to ensure peace between neighbouring villages by creating binding ties. Choosing to marry for "love" is so new, despite what romance novels might fantasise about, that those in the Social Sciences consider modern marriage to be a "social experiment" that so far has not demonstrated that it is as successful in sustaining protection of children as arranged marriages with no prospect of divorce. Remember also that in 1900, in the West, male average life expectancy was 42yrs and far less in developing countries, where it was only around 32yrs. People paired up prior to 20yrs of age and were almost immediately pregnant. 1/3 of babies died before the age of 5yrs and maternal death rates in childbirth were atrocious. Widowers did''t then seek out "love", they sought a woman prepared to help them raise their children, maybe have a few more and ensure heirs would be there to inherit if anything was owned. So when an article is written about alternatives to modern marriage, how ignorant it is to claim a deity ordered marriage a la 21st century for all! It is simply fantasy, as no marriages like ours today existed in the Middle East 2000yrs ago. There was no dating, no glorious love affairs for the 99% of citizens who were desperately poor. Survival was the #1 priority every single day and at a time when a tooth ache could very well mean death over 4 or 5 agonising days, no-one even thought about open, closed, polygamous(very common to increase chance of children surviving if mother died) or any combination thereof. The religious comments simply don't conform with history written at the time!
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