Life can feel like a big juggling act sometimes. With work, school, family, marriage, kids, our health, or perhaps all of the above, it’s easy for one or more areas of our life to get neglected. When it comes to marriage, maintaining a good balance is key to staying happy and healthy. You want to celebrate your individuality, but also nurture your identity as a spouse, also. If you feel like your marriage can use some more balance, and who doesn’t, keep reading for some sensible ways to achieve that ideal balance in your union!
1. Respect One Another
It might seem silly for me to suggest respecting your significant other, but it’s a very important part of being in a happy, balanced marriage. Showing respect means recognizing all that your spouse does such as working hard to provide for the family or taking care of your home. It also means supporting your spouse’s work and his/her interests. Even if you think some of his/her hobbies are silly, it can mean a lot to your spouse!
2. Balance Your Time
Balancing your time = balance in your marriage! Being married, or being in any committed relationship, doesn’t mean you totally lose yourself in the relationship and leave your former self behind. The two of you had fulfilling lives before your relationship, so don’t forget about it. Make time for your friends and family in addition to quality time with your spouse. Your family and friends offer support and fulfill needs that is totally different from your partner.
3. Share Everything
Sharing things within a marriage is a given. Whether it’s a place to live, bills, a TV, or a bank account, sharing is one of the perks and sometimes one of the disadvantages of being married. Don’t forget that it’s not just the tangibles that you’ll be sharing, but you’ll also have to start considering your partner’s opinions, needs, and desires in addition to your own. Be mindful when making decisions to include your spouse and take their feelings and thoughts into account.
4. Have Fun Together
Having fun is vital to keeping things interesting in your marriage. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day stuff and only talk to one another about bills, appointments, or teacher conferences, but there’s so much more to your relationship than that. You both have interesting personalities that drew you to one another, so don’t forget to have fun in your daily lives, Make an effort to be playful and enjoy one another’s company.
5. Create Boundaries
How many times have you or your spouse brought your work home with you or got preoccupied with a project and your home time and work time just started blending together? Try not to let the stress and monotony of work, school, or whatever else you’re involved in ruin your time at home with your mate. Your house is supposed to be your sanctuary, don’t let your responsibilities get in the way of your relationship or quality of life!
6. Schedule Time for Yourself
While it’s important to make time for your mate, friends, and family; don’t forget about yourself! No matter how much you like to be around other people, we can all use some alone time. Take time to go for a walk or run, enjoy a meal alone, get a massage, or take yourself shopping. Enjoy some me time by doing something you love. According to WebMD, indulging in some alone time has physical and mental health benefits so you're doing something good for yourself!
7. Keep the Romance Alive
When life gets busy, romance is often the first thing to go out the door. Romance isn’t all about sex, either. Though sex is important to a relationship, keeping the romance alive is more about taking the time to show your partner you care. Leave love notes in unexpected places, plan special date nights, or plant a loooong kiss on your mate rather than a quick smooch on the cheek. It’s easy to get comfortable and forget about taking the extra time to get gussied up for your partner or give them extra hugs and kisses, but make it a priority and your mate will really appreciate it.
8. Choose Your Battles
Does your partner leave his clothes all over the house? Or maybe she always leaves the dirty dishes for you to wash? Our mates can do things that really annoy us, but getting into an argument to prove your point or nitpicking about your partner’s bad habits is likely doing more harm than good. Choose your battles wisely. Sometimes it’s better to let the little things slide and take a look at the bigger picture. In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter?
9. Share the Responsibilities
It’s too easy for one person in the household to end up doing way more than their fair share of the household duties. In order to avoid unnecessary conflict and preserve both you and your spouse’s sanity, create a “contract” so that it’s clear who is responsible for what. If it doesn’t work out quite right the first time, revise it. Knowing what each of you is responsible for can save time and energy that can be used for more fun things!
Achieving balance in a relationship takes work, but it’s far from impossible. Think of your marriage as being part of a team. Support, try to understand, and respect your spouse. Do you have any suggestions on achieving balance in marriage? Please share your tips with us!