There are many various reasons couples fight over money. Regardless of the reason, fighting over money is never good for your relationship. It is better to try to work through the cause of your difference in opinions and bring the arguing to an end. Although it seems impossible, there is help to end this. There are financial counselors and marriage counselors that are very familiar with the reasons couples fight over money and can help you if you can’t find a solution yourself.
1. They Have Different Priorities
One of the top reasons couples fight over money is that they have different priorities. One spouse may feel like an entertainment budget is non-negotiable while the other spouse wants to cut it down or out completely if they are in financial hardship. Differences in priorities can lead to arguments and tension between you. It is important to try to come to an agreement to solve this problem. One way of doing this is sitting down and hammering out a budget you both can live with.
2. They Are Dishonest
Anytime that one party is dishonest about money, there is going to be trouble. This signals problems on many levels. It says that the one lying is afraid of their partner’s reaction and would rather lie than deal with their partner’s reaction if they are honest. It may be something as simple as telling your husband you got that stellar pair of heels for half price when you really didn’t or something as complex as hiding a credit card with tremendous debt. When it comes to money, it is always best to be honest with one another.
3. There Isn’t Enough Income
When you don’t have enough income to cover your bills, there is going to be stress over money. Whenever you both feel stressed about money, it can lead to arguments. You may not argue over what to spend the money on but what to do about your present financial situation. The key is to remember that you are on the same side. Sticking together can help you to figure a way out of your financial crisis.
4. There is Too Much Debt
Sometimes, you have a good level of income but you have got in over your heads in debt. If you realize that you are in this position, then you need to take steps to start getting out of debt. The first step may be to cut your spending, or even to cut up your credit cards. This is where a good financial counselor can really be helpful. They can help you to find ways to pay off debts sooner and advise you on ways to deal with aggravating creditors.
5. There is a Deeper Problem
If one of you has a deeper problem, it is certainly going to cause arguments. Deeper problems such as being a true shopaholic or having a gambling addiction need to be dealt with head on. You may need professional help in order to get a handle on this problem. That is nothing to be ashamed of. Getting help is a wise and mature thing to do.
6. They Are Stressed
If one of you is under a lot of stress, it may cause you to have arguments in your marriage over money. When you are under stress, a lot of things can become arguments that ordinarily would not. Stress from your job or maybe feeling overwhelmed from the demands of small children can put you on edge. Try to remember that stress is usually external of your relationship. Make the decision not to let it interfere or cause arguments between you.
7. One Person Has Too Much Control
If one person has too much control over the finances, it can lead to many problems. It is not healthy for one of you to have complete control. Make it a goal to have the finances be a shared responsibility. Make decisions concerning money together. You will find this does a lot to keep harmony in your relationship.
Many factors can cause couples to argue over money. What issues have you faced regarding finances in your relationship? How did you resolve them?