There are a lot of reasons why couples fight during the holidays. This is why it is even more important to make an effort to make your relationship a priority at this time of year. Take time to talk each day and nurture your relationship. If you keep your connection strong then hopefully you will be able to avoid falling victim to the common reasons why couples fight during the holidays.
1. Your Families Are Playing Tug of War with You
Sadly, family can make things hard on you during the holidays. You have both sides pulling at you and wanting you to be with them. It can feel impossible to please everyone. Even if you live in the same area as all of your family, it can be hard to coordinate times. The stress of this can be one of the reasons why couples fight during the holidays.
2. Money Stress
Let’s face it; the holidays are expensive. This is especially true if you have children to buy for or a big family. Money stress makes everything seem worse. It can also lead to arguments because you are worried that the holidays are going to hit you too hard financially. You could also have an argument over what to spend on people.
3. Too Much Togetherness
The holidays require a lot of togetherness in most families. And it can get to be too much, if you aren’t careful. Although my husband and I both love our families, we are usually relieved when the holidays are over and we can retreat back into our quiet little life. Try to remember that you are on the same team throughout the holidays. Remind yourself that all of the togetherness is only temporary.
4. Travel Stress
Travel stress can be a major reason why couples fight over the holidays. A long road trip can be fun but it can also be a real stress maker. This is especially true if you have children, as much as you love them. After ninety-six cries of “Are we there yet?” ‘s, someone is bound to snap. Try to give each other a little extra grace during travel times.
5. In-law Issues
In-law issues can be a problem around the holidays. Perhaps your mother-in-law is set on outdoing your dessert or your brother-in-law has made one too many comments about the fact that you haven’t lost your baby weight. Whatever the issue is, it’s an issue. This can be one of the reasons why couples fight during the holidays. Remember that your time with in-laws is limited and you will soon be back in your cozy home, just the two of you.
6. Cranky Kids
Cranky kids can make for a cranky mom and dad; trust me, I know. It is like you are trying to give your children extra patience so you don’t have as much to give each other. This is not a good situation. Try your best to avoid it by keeping your children on their regular schedule and knowing when to say when. Grandma might be unhappy you didn’t stay overnight but if it makes for a happier child, it will make for happier parents.
7. Hurt Feelings over a Gift That Isn’t Liked
I always think this one is really sad and can usually be avoided. I really think we need to consider the thought behind the gift. Maybe a set of pots and pans isn’t on your wish list but your husband or boyfriend thought it would be great because of how often you complained about the old set. Even if it something you know you will be returning, try not to display that reaction immediately. Just like us, the men in our life put a lot of thought into buying a gift.
There is no question that the holidays can be stressful on a couple. What typically causes arguments in your relationship during the holidays? How do you handle those situations?