By Corina • 10 Comments
Some people say that it’s actually healthy to argue with your partner from time to time, and that you should only pay attention so that your fights wouldn’t turn into something else, but in order to do this, it’s best to keep in mind my tips on how to resolve an argument with your partner. You should try turning all your fights into constructive conversations with your beloved one, which will help you eliminate the tensions you’ve both accumulated and that will help you resolve and clarify some important issues. A lot of the arguments you might have with your other half are sometimes unavoidable, and if not handled properly, they could cause quite a lot of emotional damage to both of you. In these situations, I hope you will make use of my creative tips on how to resolve an argument with your partner and everything will be just fine.
I really believe that the most important tip on how to resolve an argument with your partner is to try not to argue with your other half for several reasons at once. It is extremely important not to bring other things into the discussion because by doing this you will get nowhere. On the contrary, instead of solving your argument, you will only make it worse.
Another tip most therapists use when they work with couples that fight a lot, is to tell the couple that whenever they get into a fight, they should stop for a moment and go into another room (preferably the bathroom) and continue the argument there sitting in some uncomfortable positions (for example the lady could sit on the toilet seat and the man in the bathtub). I’m pretty sure that no one could continue fighting under those circumstances!
Every time two people argue with each other they tend to scream in order to make themselves heard. Well, that’s not the best way to do it because under those circumstances, nobody will pay attention to what the other person is saying. That’s why you could try arguing with your partner in writing. When you write down your feelings, you can’t scream and by reading what your other half told you, you will understand better his or her standpoint.
If your partner seems that he doesn’t get what you’re trying to tell him and why are you so upset, try to avoid repeating the same things over and over again. If you insist on repeating the things he heard before, you won’t solve a thing, you will only make him more mad and he will also not pay attention to what you’re saying.
I know that sometimes you might think that you can read his thoughts and anticipate his every move because you’ve known him for so long, but you couldn’t be more wrong. Nobody can read anybody’s thoughts! By telling your partner that you know what he thinks and why he behaves in a certain way, you will only make things worse. Listen carefully and have some trust in him!
If your partner is making you a reproach, try not to get mad and find out more details about what he’s saying. He might have got it wrong. Ask him open questions, like for example, "When did you first noticed that?" or, "How would you like me you act next time?" He will appreciate the fact that you listen to him and that you pay attention to his needs. Next time, you will start an argument, and he will surely do the same for you.
As soon as you hear what you wanted to hear in the first place (some apologies, some promises), then try to be a little more lenient. Believe him when he says he’s sorry and move on! There’s no point in talking about the same thing over and over again, especially if you’re reached an agreement. Consider this argument resolved and enjoy each other!
Life as a couple is not always easy and it’s normal to argue with your partner from time to time. This shouldn’t be a problem if you learn how to argue with him an intelligent manner; you both just need a little practice. What tips for resolving an argument with your partner could you share with me? Do tell!