When you’re in a relationship with someone, there of course will be ups and downs. But you shouldn’t have to deal with his crazy ex showing up in the picture all the time. It seems like this happens quite a bit. Some people just don’t know how to move on, and maybe your man is too nice to tell her bye for good👋 Whatever the details are, it can be frustrating. There are some ways to deal with it though if it’s happening to you.
It can be super tempting to want to think the worst if your boyfriends ex is still keeping contact, but step back for a minute and evaluate the situation as a whole. While you might want to yell at her or your man, it’s best to be calm and try to view things from all perspectives. Think about when you had a breakup? It can be normal to want to maintain a relationship with someone. It can be hard to see them with someone else. We’re not saying it’s right for her to be pushing herself in, but seeing things from this way can make you less upset when you decide how to handle it.
Something you should pay attention to how your guy is feeling about the situation. It isn’t much to worry about if he seems frustrated and annoyed, because he probably doesn’t want her talking to him as much as you do. But if you see him acting flirty or making an effort to talk to her or contact her, then you should probably have a conversation about it.
Once you have done the first two steps, if you’re still being bothered by the situation it’s time to have an honest conversation with him. Tell him why this contact with his ex is bothering you. Try and work together to solve the problem. If he really respects your feelings, he’ll make an effort to come to a solution that both of you can agree on.
It can be so tempting to want to be mean to this girl, trust me, we know. But being mean to her will only make things more complicated and worse. It could fuel the fire and make her talk to him more. She may try to turn him against you. Or if she truly is trying to move on but is having a hard time, it will only make her sadder. None of these are good outcomes, so avoid trying to make her jealous by rubbing it in her face that you’re with him and she’s not.
This one kind of ties in with number four, but try to avoid starting any big fights or drama, especially in public or on social media. Nobody needs to be involved in this situation but you, your boyfriend, and her. It shouldn’t be everyone else’s business as it only makes things worse.
If your boyfriend doesn’t really want to get involved (maybe he’s afraid of hurting her feelings) then it might be a good idea to take things into your own hands. Again, try to do this in a non-dramatic way. Make it casual and ask her if you can chat. Then just explain to her how this situation is making you feel and tell her it would mean a lot if she could back off and try to move on.
Okay, so this is the last resort for a reason. If you have tried everything from talking to your boyfriend to talking to her with no results, then you might want to evaluate your relationship. It can be straining having a third party involved, especially someone who your man had romantic history with. A red flag is if he seems hesitant or unwilling to cut off contact with her.🙅
These are just a few ways to deal with your man’s clingy ex. Of course, every situation is different and you have to do what’s best for you. Just remember that the less drama, the better!
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