It is an innate part of our humanness to want to feel loved and to experience being in love; it’s something we yearn for as soon as our teenage hormones start to bubble over, and yet it can seem like striving for an unreachable goal when it is so hard to define. How do know when you're in love with him? Let's see!
1. Love is All around
Most of us will grow up experiencing love of some kind whether it be family, friends, or someone special, and will have felt the warmth of a loving hug and well-timed hand squeeze. As the adolescent years encroach, misplaced affections in geeky boys and adoration of teen idols manage to masquerade as love in our inexperienced minds. Deep down, we probably know that there is something more out there and it starts a lifelong quest for true love.
The thing is how do we know when we are truly in love? What marks out the feeling of real from all the previous pretenders? Is this the real thing or should you keep on searching? Let’s face it, the stuff of magazines, rom-coms, chick flicks, and girly chats, makes us feel good but it is also an anguish that nibbles away night and day when you find yourself in that position of real or fake. The old mantra of “you’ll just know” plays around and around in your head until you don’t feel like you actually know very much at all.
So what are the true tell-tale signs of being in love? Love can be a tricky little character to pin down. It can be easy to dismiss the feelings that you have at the beginning of a relationship as simply lust or excitement, but, in truth, it is love in its infancy. Love isn’t something that moves in once you’re over the thrilling stage; being in love is part of the thrill. The anticipation of seeing each other, the constant day dreaming about each other, the 24/7 fixed grin on your face, they are all good signs. Obviously, they can also be signs of lust, but that little spark, that little flutter deep inside can be something awakening that goes beyond initial lust.
2. Going Deeper
When it comes to love, our bodies often betray us. There are some things that we just can’t hide. There is so much to being in love inside but there are some outward signs you’re falling in love that you just can’t hide.
There is no feeling in the world like that rush of emotions when you meet up with your boy/girlfriend. The pounding heart, sweaty palms, nervousness, flushed cheeks. They are all signs of the adrenaline and hormones that are rushing through you when you are together. These chemicals are capable of making you completely turn to jelly, lose the power of speech and turn your thoughts into indecipherable mush. These feelings are all very common at the beginning of any relationship.
Being in love means that you should feel comfortable to talk about your deep emotions, past experiences and every aspect of your life, and the person you love should take these things on board and have a deeper understanding of you. From this understanding becomes the intimacy of love, rather than just lust. The one you love should always know that special way to make you smile, and you should know that embarrassing secret that can make them blush. Being in love is about being comfortable with each other. After all, you can’t tell someone you love them if you can’t trust them with your inner thoughts and feelings.
When we go out looking for love, we are looking for a lifelong mate. When you ask yourself how you know it's love, a clear sign is that you are able to imagine your future together. Not only that, but you are able to talk together about what your futures would look like as a long-term couple. If your heart jumps when he mentions something that you could do together in the future, it’s a pretty good sign that there is something going on. It doesn’t have to be marriage and babies and being wrinkly together, but having future plans (and being excited about them) is a surefire way to answer the question how do you know you're in love?
3. So is This the One?
Unfortunately, as tired as the cliché is, only you can really tell if you are in love. Relationships are dynamic things: they change from the initial encounter, to blood-pumping passion, to quiet contentment and happiness of a long term relationship. However, one thing is for sure, if you have found “the one,” then you should be able to experience the excitement of first love and happiness of being together no matter how long you have been in the relationship. Don’t ever settle for something that you might doubt is right.
Being in love should never be about settling or making do, it should be about being with the person that knows you best in the world, makes you feel safe, knows all of your faults and past mistakes but loves you anyway and can make your heart pound like a crazed teenager at the drop of a hat!
So, tell me, when do you realize you love someone?