You expect your boyfriend to only have eyes for you. But you might have a funny feeling that he's not over his ex. Your boyfriend isn’t likely to admit he’s still thinking about his ex girlfriend. However, little signs can help you assess if he is, or isn't over her.
Snapshot Survey
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1. Her Name Comes up — a Lot
If your boyfriend mentions his ex-girlfriend's name once in a blue moon, there’s probably nothing to worry about. But if her name starts coming up more and more, he might secretly have feelings for her. This means that she's on his mind. Most people only think about those they care about.
2. He Hates Her with a Passion
If he’s strongly passionate about how much he hates or dislikes her, and constantly talks about the bad things she did in the relationship, he hasn’t emotionally moved on from the break up. One sign of getting over an ex is being able to let go and put the past behind him.
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3. He Makes Comparisons
If your boyfriend compares you to his ex and you come out on top, you probably don’t have a reason to worry. On the other hand, if these comparisons make her look good, and he’s bringing attention to what you don’t do, he might be trying to mold you into his ex.
4. He Hasn't Given Back Her Stuff
Another sign that your boyfriend might not be over his ex: he’s still holding onto memories of the relationship. He might keep pictures of his ex or gifts she's given hime. Keeping a gift might not be a big deal, but he could be holding onto this stuff just in case they reconcile and get back together.
5. There’s a Lot of Communication
Your boyfriend giving his ex-girlfriend a birthday shout out on Facebook can be innocent. But if the communication is frequent, be suspicious. Your boyfriend might say she's one of his best friends. But if you feel that they're spending way too much time together, or if they frequently talk via social media or through text messaging, he might not be completely over his ex.
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Regular, in-depth conversations could be a red flag, especially if the topics are nostalgic or intimate. Trust your intuition—if their chats seem to cover more shared memories than current events, it's a concern. It's also about boundaries; whether he's hiding these interactions or being overly transparent to avoid suspicion, the emotional content is key. If their exchange feels like it crosses the line from friendly to emotionally charged, it's time to have an open and honest conversation about where you both stand.
6. They Recently Broke up
It takes time to get over a break up. So if you’re in a new relationship with a guy who recently broke up with his girlfriend a few days or weeks ago, chances are he's not completely over her. In this case, you might be the rebound relationship. And if he still has strong feelings for her, there's a chance that they'll get back together.
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If he brings her up frequently in conversation, even if it’s to complain, that's a clear signal he’s still processing his feelings. Remember, indifference, not hate, is the true opposite of love. Be wary if he's comparing the two of you or if her belongings are still dotted around his living space—these are signs he hasn't fully let go. Trust your instincts and look for patterns, because unless they're replaced with memories you both create, the shadow of a past love might just be too large for a new romance to take root.
7. You Have a Gut Feeling
The fact that your boyfriend communicates with his ex or holds onto a memory of the relationship doesn't always mean he's thinking about her. At the end of the day, you have to go with your gut feeling. If you believe he still has romantic feelings for her, then he probably does.
If you suspect that your boyfriend isn’t over his ex, don't immediately break off the relationship. Talk with him and share your suspicions. He might come clean or he might deny having feelings for her. After talking about the situation, you have to do what you feel is best for you — even if it’s breaking up.
What are other signs that a boyfriend isn't over his ex?
Comments
karla: Yeah you're right thanks @Maja Milosevic
The: @paris no prob. Stay happy and smile :)
Paris: The queen of bitches yeah he's a jerk he could have told me that he had a girl I would have respected him more he said that he wanted to discuss something with me but never got back to me. That was like almost a month ago it's hurts but it's over a week and it's gets better everyday I know the type of women I am he will regret it. Thanks for responding love❤️
Lindsay: You should split if you feel it in you gut. I know "my guy" still has feelings for his ex, it's totally obvious. I'm just not sure how to handle the situation.
Maja: @karla yeah probably. But I would go with 'follow your gut' , if you feel that he's still got her on his mind or if he keeps comparing and talking about her, then it's probably best to end things before it gets too complicated.
Arti: Having a gut feeling would only be likely if there is a reason to have that!! You wouldn't have. Guy feeling out of the blue @fjdjsjd
karla: Ugh I going through this situation. And the most stressful thing is that they had kids together. He told me he wants to marry me but i honestly don't feel the same. All of these points check. I truly think he's not over her. We don't really argue but when we do it's because of his ex. They have to communicate cause of the children but I've caught her flirting with him over text. She is a whore and he told me she cheated on him and wouldn't stop talking about her when we met. He told me many things about their relationship. I've been with him for a year and a half and he tells me he loves me and shows me as well but idk if he's the one cause of he's ex. He even told me that she's jealous of me cause he treats me how she wished he had. They didn't have the best relationship. It ended very bad and they would only fight all the time according to him and also it took him a year for me to see his ex face to face when i asked him for a while back. She was a bitch and didn't say anything to me but they were arguing and causing at eachother. He doesn't do that to me though. So idk I hate how this article is true
The: @paris so,stokes guys use u to cheat on their gf and make them jealous. My bf also did that and there were like cheat wars but we were fifteen and stupid so... We didn't realise we actually loved each other till we moved to different countries. This guy u r talking about is a player and a cheater don't talk to him don't answer his calls or texts ever. Never agree to meet up with him. Avoid him completely. He is not worth the time.
MsMye: ❤️❤️❤️
Fjdjsjd: So according to this even if he's over his ex as long as you don't think he is you should just break up? Wtf
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