Break ups are different for everyone. Sometimes, it's something you know you NEED to do. Other times, things aren't so clear. There's a few questions you can yourself before you consider and/or initiate the idea of a break up! Hopefully, it'll give you some clarity on what your next step should be. If you can think of any others, please share!
1. Have I Given It My All?
Before you give up on a relationship, think about the effort you've put into it. Did you try all that you could to work through whatever problems you were having? Did you really commit to the relationship? When you're not all-in, it's easy for romance to fizzle away. The two should be working hard to make it work and if you feel like you have been, with no success, you're right to let things go.
2. Is Anyone else Influencing My Decision?
Do you have any friends that are #TeamBreakUp?! If you have friends that are trying to sway you to break up with him, evaluate their motives. Do they really have your best interest at heart? Or do they just want you to be able to join in on their next ladies night? Regardless of your outside influences, you have to make sure that you're going to be at peace with the decision that you make.
3. Am I Just Being Impulsive?
If you're the type of person who's quick to make rash decisions, maybe you should take a little breather and think about this. Are you considering a break up because it sounds right at this moment or are you considering a break up because it's what you really need to do?
4. Have I Really Expressed My Needs Openly?
If you have needs, desires, and concerns, you need to be able to express them to your partner. The two of you should always be on the same page and that won't be possible if he doesn't know what it is you're thinking! So, if you're thinking about breaking up with him because you wish he'd listen more, be a little more adventurous, or whatever else you need, tell him. Choose communication before you just decide to cut him off!
5. Is This a Healthy Relationship?
Does the relationship make you happy? Do you feel emotionally stable in it? These are both important questions to consider. A healthy relationship practices healthy habits like communication, spending quality time together, etc. If this doesn't ring true for you, it might not be the best relationship for you to stay in.
6. Are There More Cons than Pros?
Arguments come with the territory of having a relationship but if it's the ONLY thing you two do, ask yourself: does the good really outweigh the bad? Make a list of relationship cons/pros. If there are more negative things about the relationship than there are positive, something's not right. This list should be helpful in deciding if whether or not you want to break up!
7. Is This Really What I Want?
Ultimately, it comes down to one thing: Is this what you want? I know, that's a tough question. However, I'm sure that deep down, you know the answer to it.
Well, there you have it. These are just seven questions you should be asking yourself before you consider/initiate the idea of a break up. Have you found yourself asking these questions? Which other questions did you contemplate? Share your thoughts in the comments!