If you have asked yourself this question it needs answering. There is no right or wrong answer but in the end you have to make a decision rather than let it fester. Trust or not to trust? These are the things to consider and then you can decide and stop letting the question niggle away at you.
1. Your Insecurities Are Ruining Your Life
Trust and a lack of trust often has something to do with your own insecurities. It is just a fact of life. If he has cheated, or given you a “good” reason to think he will cheat, then that is another matter. If you are insecure, you may “look” for reasons not to trust him. You may look for evidence that is not really there because you are insecure. The fact is, if he is going to cheat, why would you want to keep him?
2. If He is Going to Cheat, He is Not Worthy of You
Damn right he is not worthy of you. No matter what you think of yourself or how little you think of yourself, there are men out there that would worship the ground you walk on. It is true that sometimes these guys are hard to find, but that doesn’t matter. The fact is that if he is going to cheat on you with your friends, sister, mother or strangers, then he is not worth the drippings off the end of your nose.
3. Your Friends Are Not Your Friends if They Are Sleeping with Your Boyfriends
Blame him because he made the commitment to you, but blame your friends too because they are supposed to share a sisterly bond with you. A real friend would have your back and tell you if your fella tried it on with them. They wouldn’t take him up on the offer. There is no excuse...ever!
4. You Should Both Be Working towards a Trusting Relationship
If you truly trust your man, you should be able to leave him in a room full of lingerie models (and easy women) and know that all he will do is have a chat. I mention the “easy women” bit because you may think your man hasn’t got the personality or charm to attract a lingerie model, but we all know women that will drop their knickers if a guy winks at them. If you trust him, then the situation he is in should never bother you, be it that he is with your friends (most of which he is probably attracted to), or if he in solitary confinement in prison.
5. If He is Going to Cheat, then He is Going to Cheat
It is a little like being robbed. If a robber is determined to get into your house, there are no amounts of locks and guard dogs that will keep him out. If your man is going to cheat, then he is going to. Settle your mind to the fact that cheating is not something you can prevent. You can encourage it, especially if you cheat yourself, but you cannot prevent it. On the other hand, if he truly loves you, then even encouraging him to cheat will not push him to it.
6. Is Your past Experience with Him Ruining Your Trust?
If he has cheated on you in the past, then you will never trust him ever. You have to make a choice. If you want to live the rest of your life without fully trusting the man you are with, then stay with him. If you are not happy living the rest of your life with somebody you cannot trust, then maybe this is not the person you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with.
7. Is Your past Experience with Other Men Ruining Your Trust?
You shouldn’t tar all men with the same brush. Some men are going to cheat on you and some are not. The fact is that cheating is fun. It is naughty and it is exciting. Some people cheat, old or young, but your future happiness depends on if you can trust him. Other men are going to mess with your head and make you an untrusting person. You need to consider how much of your mistrust is because of him, and how much it is because of you.
Don’t let questions like this derail your relationship. Ask yourself the questions you need to be answered and face the issue. Trust is one of the bedrocks of relationships.