There are certain signs your relationship is worth saving even when things have gotten to be a bit bumpy. All relationships have their ups and downs but you should still be happy overall with the relationship. Ladies if you are wondering whether you should fix the problems in your relationship or whether its best to walk away, I’m going to help you out. Analyze your relationship as you go through the list below of these signs your relationship is worth saving.
1. What is Your Relationship like?
There are elements in a relationship that are crucial so both people can be happy. Ask yourself if your relationship has trust, respect, loyalty, honesty and commitment. These are the building blocks that all good relationships are built on. If your relatiomship is lacking one of these elements, it spells trouble. One of the best signs that your relationship is worth saving is if you have all those fundamental elements in your relationship.
The next point to consider is the communication between the two of you. Does this guy meet your communication needs? Some of us like to be texted around the clock while others prefer more phone calls and less text messages. Regardless of your specific needs, your guy should be able to meet them. If you are always unhappy because your boyfriend takes hours to respond to a text or goes days without calling, make your needs clear and try to reach a compromise. If that doesn’t work, maybe its time to rethink the relationship.
3. Fun Times
When was the last time you had fun with your boyfriend? Consider saving the relationship if you are still able to enjoy each others' company. But if the relationship feels stale and neither one of you wants to make an effort to liven things up, re-examine the reasons you want to stick around. There should be more good times than bad ones in your relationship.
4. Top Three People
Make a list of your favorite three people that you enjoy spending time with. Your boyfriend should be somewhere on that list. You should look forward to spending time with him even if it's just chilling at his place watching movies. Conversations with him should feel comfortable and flow naturally instead of forced and awkward.
5. Are You Still in Love?
There is a difference between fierce in love feelings and lukewarm feelings when it comes to relationships. If you are crazy in love with each other even though there are problems, chances are both of you will want to save the relationship. But if those feelings are missing, its likely that one of you will start looking for the exit door of the relationship. If the feelings aren’t there, you can’t force them. Once you admit to yourself that you aren’t in love with him, it's time to hand him his walking papers.
6. The Reality of Relationship Problems
Think of the issues that you are dealing with in the relationship. Are these minor issues that can be fixed with a bit of effort? Or are you dealing with emotionally life-draining issues that are difficult to handle? Another thing to consider is how much effort is your partner willing to give to fix relationship issues. Both of you should be trying to find solutions to issues and be willing to change if it will improve your relationship.
7. You Work Well Together
Some relationships seem like nothing but work and when a problem arises, it's a huge, messy ordeal. But what if you and your partner truly able to work well together? Healthy couples are able to work well together in good and bad times and support one another through it all. If your partner is the type of person you feel that you can get through anything with, which is a rare quality, it's certainly worth saving.
8. Are You Able to Be Yourself?
Does your partner allow you to feel comfortable enough to truly be yourself? Does your partner make you want to be a better person? Those are both very important questions to ask yourself while pondering whether to save your relationship or not. If you're in a relationship with someone who wants to change you or makes you feel as if you're not good enough-it very well might not be worth the fight. It's hard to be in a committed relationship with someone who isn't supportive of and love you just the way you are,
9. Growing Old Together
The years will pass and there will come a time where you won’t be that fresh-faced young girl but more of a wrinkly old lady full of wisdom to share. Now that you have envisioned yourself as a senior citizen, think of the guy you want beside you. Do you honestly see your current boyfriend as the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with? If you don’t, you have your answer right there.
10. Want the Same Things
Do you two want the same things out of life? If you dream of a future with children and a house in LA, but he wants to remain childless and unmarried, you have a problem. It's rare for two people to want the same things, so if you're on the same page, you should try to save the relationship.
11. Can't Live without Him
Try to imagine your life without him. Sure, tomorrow it would be hard, but would it still be hard ten years after the breakup? If you don't think you'd live a happy life without him, then you should attempt to save the relationship. You two owe each other that much.
12. Opinions of Others
You two know your relationship better than anyone else, but some close friends might have some good advice for you. If your BFF tells you that she knows you've never been happier than when you're with your man, it's a sign you shouldn't give up. If everyone around you considers your relationship worth saving, then maybe you should, too.
13. A Long History
Studies have shown you shouldn't just "stay together for the kids," because it's healthier for them to live in a divorced household than an unhappily married one. However, the more history you have, the more important it is to try to save the relationship. If you own a house together and have several children, you shouldn't leave without trying to make things work first.
14. All of a Sudden
Are you unhappy all of a sudden, because your man did something small you didn't like? If the problems are new, then you should try to fix them. On the other hand, if the same problems have been popping up again and again for months or even years, it may be time to end it.
15. What Will You Regret?
What would you regret more: leaving him or staying with him? While it's important to think of your needs as a couple, it's also important to think about your needs as an individual person. If he's holding you back from achieving your dreams, it's time to leave. But if he's helping your dreams come true or simply supporting them, try to make it work.
16. Back Together
Ask yourself if you think the breakup would only be temporary. If you assume that you'll get back together after a month or two of anger, then there's no reason to split in the first place. Making it work now will save the both of you a whole lot of trouble and heartache.
17. Outside Influences
You need to figure out why you're thinking about ending the relationship. If it's because your parents have been telling you to end it, ignore them. This is your life. If you're happy, stay with him. No one, except for you and your man, should have any say in your relationship. Don't listen to others, because they don't know your relationship like you do.
18. You Don't Want Anyone else
If you've been eying other attractive men, then it might be a sign that you're ready to move on. However, if your boyfriend is still the only one that you want to be with, you should try to save the relationship. There may be other fish out in the sea, but you've already gotten a great catch. Don't lose it if you don't have to.
19. Major Life Changes
If you've recently moved to a new location or if he just got a new job, you need to give it some time before you decide whether or not you should break up. When you go through a major life change, you need time to readjust. Things are always messy in the beginning, but they might go back to normal soon, so don't give up just yet.
Hopefully these points helped you clarify if you should fight for your relationship or just let him go. Although it's difficult to say goodbye to the wrong guy, the right guy will offer you all the great things that a relationship consists of and more. Ladies can you share other signs that a relationship is worth fighting for?
This article was written in collaboration with editor Lisa Washington and Holly Riordan.