You get married with the hopes of keeping those vows until the end of time. Every relationship has its rough patches and in most cases you can work with your spouse to get past them. Sometimes we argue and disagree and live with the false security that everything is going to be okay. However, there are a few telltale signs that your marriage is headed to divorce court that every couple should be aware of.
1. Putting Your Problems on Blast
We’ve all seen those couple fights that end up on Facebook. Oh, I cringe every time I see it. Once you’ve come to the point where you are not even concerned about keeping your personal problems private, you should know things are headed in a bad direction. If you want to salvage your marriage it is time to put the lock on social media and keep your business between you and your partner.
2. Little Time Together
I know busy schedules, kids, and work can make it difficult to find time to spend together as a couple, but when the absences of your spouse barely cause you to think twice there is a problem. You seem to become unattached from your mate. What are you going to do about it?
3. Not Seeking Help
When your marriage is in shambles the obvious first step is to seek counseling to fix things. However, if one or both of you don’t want to seek help then it is safe to say you’ve already checked out of your marriage.
4. It’s Not 50/50
Despite what some may say, marriage is not a 50/50 effort. You both have to put in 100 percent to make your marriage work. If someone isn’t doing their fair share then you won’t get through this rough patch.
5. Lost Respect
We all want respect and we should expect respect from our spouse. In the same way, we should show our spouse respect. It should be shown in the way we speak to each other, how we treat one another, and how we speak about our spouse to others. Don’t accuse him of not showing you respect until you’ve checked yourself.
6. Not Working as a Team
When you got married, you agreed to be a part of the same team. You should be working together like co-captains. A good marriage works together on everything from parenting to careers and family. Are you still on the same team? If not, what happened?
For some, cheating is a deal breaker. Others have successfully made it past infidelity. If you are in a marriage with someone who has cheated or you have cheated yourself, it is time to have a serious talk. If the cheating hasn’t stopped and there are no signs of it stopping, it is time to move on. If both parties are now committed to marriage then you need to decide if you can let go of the hurt and forgive so you can move forward.
Do you notice any of these signs in your marriage? Marriage is tricky. It really is a joint effort. One person can’t make the marriage work, both partners have to be willing to give the other 100 percent effort. Seeking professional help from a counselor or respected religious leader is a good starting point.