Even though your relationship seems perfect, there are still a few things a therapist says you must know before tying the knot. Just like Kim Leatherdale, relationship coach, says “Being in love is a wonderful feeling, but staying in love is a wonderful skill.”. Every healthy and cherished relationship does require a lot of work and there are quite a few things you should discuss with your partner about marriage before taking this big step. Even though you think that what you feel now will never change, you might not say the same after a few years of marriage. Here are a few things a therapist says you must know before tying the knot, so you can create a more rewarding relationship:
1. People Change
Things and people always change. Nothing stays the same. People continue to grow throughout their entire lives, so be prepared for this if you decide to get married. This is one of the most important things a therapist says you must know before tying the knot, because your partner will not always be the same person they were when you married them. Make room for changes in yours and your partner’s feelings and needs and learn to adapt.
2. Not Everyone Will Be Monogamous
The sad truth is that not everyone will be monogamous throughout the course of their marriage. Studies actually show that 22 percent of married men and 14 percent of married women cheat on their spouse during the course of their marriage. Be honest with your partner and talk about everything, because the better you communicate, the less likely such a thing will happen to you.
3. Your Partner is Not Always What You Want Them to Be
Your partner can’t always be what you want them to be. Sometimes, you will be disappointed, just like they will be disappointed with you and your actions. We all make mistakes; we are all human after all. It’s natural to feel this way from time to time, yet you should talk openly with your partner about it and try to fix any problem, so it won’t affect your happiness and your stability as a couple.
4. You Should Always Fight Fair
Fighting fair will not damage your relationship; on the contrary, it will strengthen that special bond you share. Learn how to fight in a more friendly and productive way, so you’ll be able to clarify certain aspects of your relationship. Improve your communication skills, be a better listener and learn how to fight fair before you decide to tie the knot.
5. Be True to Yourself
You should be in a relationship or you should decide to marry someone because you really love them, and because you see yourself spending the rest of your life next to them. Don’t do it because you’re afraid that you’ll end up alone, or that you won’t find anyone who can love you just the way you are. If your reasons for being in a relationship are not genuine, then your marriage might not work and you will only hurt yourself and the other person as well.
6. Be Honest about Your Needs
Improve your communication skills and be honest with your partner about your needs and your feelings. Hiding your needs will only lead to frustration and to emotional pain. You won’t be happy in your relationship and in the long term, you might even grow apart from your loved one. Tell them what you want and what would make you happy, because they can’t read your mind.
7. Your Relationship Will Never Be the Same as It Was in the Beginning
As I’ve said before, things change, people change, and your relationship will change as well. Actually, it will never be the same as it was in the beginning. Try to avoid having unrealistic expectations if you want to have a happy and healthy relationship. Even though passion was more present in the beginning of your relationship, now it has turned into stability and comfort, so try not to neglect these aspects.
Making a relationship work is never easy. You need to have patience and you need to put some effort into it. Do you know any other things someone should know before tying the knot? Please share your thoughts with us in the comments section!