“If only I wasn't taken” are usually the words that frequently go through your mind when you are seriously crushing on your boyfriend’s friend. Although you may really enjoy hanging out with your crush and feel totally comfortable around him, the fact remains he’s completely forbidden. If you are facing this precarious dilemma, I’m going to help guide you when you are crushing on your boyfriend’s friend.
1. Crush Confusion
Crushing on your boyfriend’s friend can be a sign that you are unhappy in your relationship for any number of reasons, like it lacks excitement, the newness has long gone or you feel neglected. But many times your relationship can be perfectly fine and crushes on attractive people occur just because you are alive and breathing. Having a crush can make you feel a combination of feelings like lust and excitement or guilt and shame because you are having romantic feelings about another person.
2. Analyze Your Crush
Try to figure out what is making you crush on your boyfriend’s friend. Is it something physical like he has breathtaking green eyes, or is it something more on an emotional level? For example, maybe you are crushing hard on this guy because your relationship is feeling stale. Once you figure out what it is that is attracting you to this other person, you can determine what should be your next step.
3. Bring New Energy into Your Relationship
If you feel like you have this crush because your relationship is begging for a jolt of life, look for new things that you can try with your boyfriend. Trying out new things even as simple as having dinner in a new restaurant or getting away for the weekend can bring a sense of newness back into your relationship when you feel like it has fallen into a rut. It can also deepen the bond that the two of you share. Once you turn your focus on your relationship and its needs, your crush will fade away.
4. Feeling Neglected
Another reason a crush can develop is because you enjoy the attention. If you are feeling neglected in your relationship, then you need to make your boyfriend aware of your feelings. The two of you need to make your relationship a priority and nurture it if you want it to work out. Spending time together doing fun things that you both enjoy can help remind you that the love that you have for each other is still there.
5. Respect Their Friendship
If I’ve learned anything in my life, it's that guys may seem really tough on the outside but they are big softies on the inside. So this means that crossing the line and acting on your feelings would devastate your boyfriend because it's one of the coldest things you could do to him. Not only would you gravely jeopardize your relationship but you would do serious damage to their friendship once your boyfriend finds out about it. It’s best to respect their friendship and just be friends with your crush and nothing more.
6. What is Best for You
On the other hand, if you aren't happy with your current relationship and aren't in love anymore, it's time to walk away. Usually crushes are harmless but if you have fallen in love with your crush, it's usually because he makes you happier, you feel he is better suited for you or you found something in him that was lacking in your relationship. If this is the case, it's time to end things with your boyfriend because it isn't fair to him. If you have given it a lot of thought and have figured out that you would rather be with the other guy, listen to your heart.
7. After the Breakup
If you have ended the relationship, give yourself time to get over the breakup. Once you are ready to move on, evaluate your feelings for your crush. If you still feel like you would make a great couple, speak to him about the possibility of dating. If he is interested in you, then discuss how dating each other would make your boyfriend feel. If you know dating him would cause major drama between the two of them, back away and search elsewhere for love unless you are both willing to deal with the consequences.
A crush on your boyfriend’s friend is a really tricky situation but I hope these tips have helped make things easier. How did you deal with a crush on your boyfriend’s friend?