Dating is a minefield and if you have a lot of dates (nothing wrong with that, by the way), it is easy to fall into some habits. Try to see each new date as an adventure, a journey to somewhere new, so approach each one with a new eye. Don’t fall into bad dating habits that will put him off and ruin your chances of another date.
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1. Don’t Talk about Your Ex!
It seems an obvious one but is a very easy trap to fall into. Your date asks you about a past holiday, or maybe you have a funny relevant anecdote – and suddenly you find yourself having to talk about an old flame. It is not going to ruin the date, of course, but is something you should slowly filter in, in later dates. You’ll find that you may overthink it as you realise they are coming up, and either come across hesitant and make things awkward, or too wistful and… well, make things awkward!
2. Using Your Phone
It is best for you to leave your phone in your bag on a date. As now your phone will likely tell you not just when you have a call or text, but emails, social networking messages, group messages, and updates, it could be flashing all evening! This is bad for two main reasons, firstly – it is rude. If you want the date to go well then make them feel like you are more interested in them for these few hours than your phone. Secondly, it can be really distracting; you need to be on top form while dating, so you do not want to be distracted by the most recent holiday plans for your group of friends.
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3. Drinking Too Much
It’s only natural to assume that a date may involve alcohol. If you want to, you should have a drink to calm the nerves – after all, dating isn’t the easiest way to spend your evening, and you may feel it goes smoother with a drink inside of you. Just don’t let it get too far, you want to make a great impression and it is too risky if you drink so much alcohol that you start crying about your old cat at the dinner table. Find a happy medium.
4. Feeling Pressurised
Even though you may have had a really lovely evening, don’t let yourself feel as though you need to spend any more time with them than you need to. Even though it may be tempting, end the date at a point that you plan beforehand with yourself, so that you know exactly what you want to do. You are sure to have been a great date and so whenever you end it you will be remembered.
5. Nervous Fiddling!
Dating can make anyone feel nervous. Here in the UK, we are so polite that we tend to keep our feelings within and it comes out through nervous habits. Touching your face, biting your nails, checking your teeth for food – all perfectly normal things, but they do not come across well and you may look a little crazy! Let your date know that you are comfortable around them by laughing it off. Relax – let out the real you.
6. Being a Chatterbox
This is another nervous habit that seems to show itself while dating. It is difficult to find the balance between keeping things going and away from awkward silences. Make sure you give your date a chance to talk too, hopefully, conversation will flow naturally from there.
7. Negativity
Your date will remember how they feel when they are with you – and the more you complain about the food, your job, and your family, the more they will feel negative too. Keep the topics upbeat, you can, of course, tell them what annoys you, especially in later dates, but maintain your tone at a point that you want to be associated with you!
8. Ordering Spaghetti
Don’t! Even confident Italian women who can slurp spaghetti like a pro do not order spaghetti (or linguine or tagliatelle or any other long pasta) on a date.
9. Trying Too Hard
When it comes to dating, it is important to make as much effort as possible – look good, sound good, and generally show them how amazing you are. But it will show if you come across as too keen, annoyingly people seem to love “the chase”.
10. Not Being Yourself
Due to all of these awful nervous habits and rules, dating may make you feel you can’t really be yourself. You will be trying so hard to impress that you might forget that you are good enough as you are! So, although you are nervous and trying hard to be liked, any falsities will show. If you want a second date, you will be more successful being yourself.
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