I’m sure a lot of you would like to know how to get closure from a relationship, especially since so many people have experienced that horrible pain caused by a bad breakup that occurred when you least expect it. That's an unfortunate event that leaves some pretty nasty scars on your emotional well-being. Sometimes, love fades and there’s nothing you can do to change that. There’s no point in wondering obsessively about what happened, what you did wrong or what you could have done to prevent that, because most of the time it’s nobody’s fault, and these things just happen. Learn how to get closure from a relationship, so you’ll be able to move on and put the past behind you.
1. Give Yourself Time to Heal
The most important piece of advice I can give you on how to get closure from a relationship is to tell you to give yourself enough time to heal and recover. That horrible pain that you are feeling right now will go away, since time heals everything. Just keep that in mind and don’t beat yourself up if you still haven’t managed to get past your former relationship, even if you broke up with your partner quite some time ago.
2. Learn to Forgive
Another important step to take in order to get closure after a bad breakup is, of course, learning to forgive. Here, I’m talking about forgiving your partner for what he or she did and also about forgiving yourself for what you didn’t do. You have something to learn from everything you experience. If you indeed made a mistake this time, make sure that won’t happen again in the future and accept the fact that you are not perfect and neither is your former love. Forgiveness is the way to get over the pain, so you won’t become a prisoner of your past.
3. Have a Symbolic Ceremony
This is one of the most used therapeutic techniques when it comes to dealing with loss. It’s a very helpful technique that offers spectacular results. This process will allow you to say good-bye to the relationship that didn’t work out and you’ll be able to get some closure. You could gather some things that remind you of your former love and burn them, or you could simply donate them to charity. You’ll be able to move on and focus on your future instead of being stuck in the past.
4. Write a Letter
This is another very useful thing you could do if you realize that you’ve grieved for long enough and that now it’s the perfect time to make some changes in your life. Write a letter to your ex-partner, where you’ll detail all your feelings, what you wish them to know but never had the chance to actually tell them and when you feel like you’ve written all you had to say, simply burn it or shred it and let go of those words. This is a very good way to find closure emotionally.
5. The Empty Chair
This is another very simple but extremely efficient psycho-therapeutic technique which is often used with people who are dealing with the loss of a close person or with people who are going through a bad breakup. You are supposed to sit in front of an empty chair and imagine that in that specific chair sits the person who is no longer in your life. Then simply talk to that person and say the things you didn’t have the guts or the chance to say. You will feel more relieved and at peace with yourself and you’ll start moving in a new direction, away from that past that haunted you for too long.
6. Don’t Forget about Yourself!
Even if you have recently gone through a pretty painful breakup, don’t forget about yourself! Always remind yourself how wonderful you are and how lucky you are for simply being you. Do some of those things you love! Go to a spa and pamper yourself! Do things that you’ll enjoy, things that will help you feel good about yourself! Focus on your needs and fulfill them! Learn to love yourself more and focus on your future instead of obsessing over your past.
If you are the one responsible for that breakup and you feel you still can’t move on, even if you’ve managed to forgive yourself for you mistakes, try to apologize, so you’ll get you ex-partner’s forgiveness as well. You will also help them get some closure and you’ll finally be able to leave your past behind, so it won’t haunt you anymore.
I know that sometimes getting over a breakup is easier said than done, but you should know that it’s not impossible to get closure if you try hard enough. How did you get past a relationship that caused you more pain than happiness? What other useful tips on how to get closure from a relationship could you give us? Please share your advice with us in the comments section!