There may be no truer saying than "one of the ways to be happy being alone is to learn how to be solo without being lonely." In this overcrowded world, it can truly seem like one is the loneliest number. But with a little adjustment of the old attitude, the new one will leave you wondering where have YOU been your whole life. Learning ways to be happy being alone is instant freedom. Instead of thinking of reasons why not to do something, you’ll be concentrating on why would you NOT be doing something!
In this world of people people everywhere and not a date to nosh with, one of the best ways to be happy being alone is to do something where you don’t care whether or not someone else is along for the ride. The concert no-one else wanted to attend with you may have last minute rush tickets, half the price and twice the fun, because you know the person you brought is loving the performance. Taking time off (cough cough) work because your favorite store is having a super sale is the best way to treat your bestie (that would be You) to a day of decadence.
If the Pitiful Me bug has made its rounds to your home, remember why you are a great person to spend time with. Make a list of good deeds big and small you’ve done lately, a funny story that happened to you in the past, an outfit in which you look particularly hot, or touching compliments you’ve received in the past. These will remind you why you are the bomb!
Sometimes, you just have to remember why it is more fun when no-one is watching. Do you have the softest pair of Hello Kitty PJ pants in which you love to watch trash TV? Do you think that eating mint fudge ripple out of the container actually tastes better? Is your singing in the car on par with Mariah’s, Celina’s, and Christina’s? Take yourself for a joy ride and put the pedal to the metal!
Does no one truly understand the nuanced performances in the latest Lifetime tear jerkers the way you do? Is the romance section of movie rentals filled with old, neglected friends? Do you miss speaking every line to your favorite high school movies like you did back then? Well, pull out the debit card and call it a Saturday, Sister! Even by watching your old favorite movies, you will reintroduce yourself to you.
Do you really want someone around while you butcher the language of love using the CDs you paid good money to learn? Before you offer Giada’s dessert recipe to someone else, shouldn’t you try it in the privacy of your own kitchen? When you re-upholster your dining room chairs, isn’t it better to be in your sweats mucking and fixing it up by yourself? Learning something new isn’t always pretty, but it is beautiful. And who better to share it with than yourself?
No, this does not take away from the goal of being alone. It adds to it. When the noise of asking "Who can I get to do this with me?" goes away, you can truly choose the people with whom you want to spend time. This also brings you back to yourself. Like mom and your 4th grade teacher said, who you have as your friends reflects upon you. Getting those people back in your life adds something positive to it, supporting you and lifting you up. Chances are, they also understand the value of One, and will share your tango of being alone and not lonely.
Sometimes, a self-evaluation is in order. Do you still love your furniture choices? Does your haircut still show the real you? Do your shoes still fit your style? Sometimes being alone can reinforce that you are the ever-evolving creature you were meant to be. Be fearless — move that furniture, change that outgoing voicemail message! Becoming more in tune with yourself will shed a whole new light on the rest of your life.
There are so many ways to be happy being alone. The best news is, the only right answer is the one you come up with for yourself! What do you like to do when you have some time for yourself? What’s the best advice you’ve ever given to someone who told you they just don’t know what to do with their free time?
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