It can be hard to learn how to tell if you're unhappy in a relationship, especially if you've been in your relationship for a really, really long time. Sometimes, comfort can be mistaken as happiness and you don't want that. What ways are there for learning how to tell if you're unhappy in a relationship? Take a look below, I've got the top 17 signs you should be watching out for!
1 You Fear Committing
Finding out you are really unhappy in your relationship is always hard, but learning how to tell if you're unhappy in a relationship is even harder sometimes. Do you constantly fear committing to your partner? Do you not think that you are completely good together? Do you imagine breaking up all of the time? These are signs that you've got to watch out for. You should want to be with your partner forever, if you are serious about them.
2 You Conceal Your True Self
What about your true self? Do you reveal that to your partner? Do you feel like you can be yourself around him or her? If not, why are you with them? You should be able to be completely true to yourself in front of your partner. You should be able to be completely open and let them read you.
3 You Snoop a Lot
While this might seem like a distrustful action, you probably are just snooping because you are hoping to find some shred of something that you can break up with them for. While you might be somewhat happy sometimes in your relationship, overall you are unhappy and you want to break up; you just don't know how, so you snoop, hoping to find something.
4 Constantly Depressed
Being depressed is something that is constant in your life, especially in terms of your relationship. When you think about the future and being with your girlfriend or boyfriend, you are extremely depressed and you don't really want to dwell on it.
5 Imagine Life without Your Partner Constantly
Oh, this is where the breakup part comes into play. Do you constantly think about ending your relationship? What about just disappearing and never coming back? I did this in my last relationship and it was awful. That is the reason why we aren't together anymore! If you can imagine your life without your partner, why are you still with them?
6 You Hide Your Relationship from Other People
Does your family know that you are dating someone? Do your friends know? These are the people that are constant in your life and if you feel the need to be ashamed of your relationship, why are you in it? Why do you think that you have to hide your relationship? That's an important question to consider too!
7 You Resent Your Partner
Additionally, if you are failing at a lot of these signs but you are constantly resenting your partner for no real reason at all – other than existing – why are you with them again? Resentment is a common thing to feel when you really are unhappy in your relationship and when you really don't want to be with him or her anymore.
8 You Tell Yourself It's Not That Bad
When you're in a good, healthy relationship, there shouldn't be a lot of comparison where you feel like you need to convince yourself that things aren't so bad. Don't wait until you're completely miserable and can't take it anymore before you try to do something about your relationship.
9 You Keep Hoping Your Partner Will Change
A common piece of relationship advice is to not try to change your partner. But, we can also be guilty of staying in relationship secretly hoping that he/she does change. Don't wait for your partner to change because if it hasn't happened by now, it probably won't happen later.
10 You Look for Ways to Spend Time Apart
Healthy couples look for ways to spend time with their partner but also want their own set of friends and interests outside of the relationship. If you frequently look for excuses or ways you can get out of spending time with your partner, you can bet that you're pretty unhappy.
11 You Reminisce over Old Feelings
Relationships evolve and life changes so there will be times when you look back and reminisce over old times. However, if you find yourself always looking back to when you first started dating and how happy and in love you were, it might be time to talk things out or move on.
12 You Lie to Yourself
Lies in a relationship are never a good thing and if you catch yourself telling a fib here and there, it's time to set things straight. Do you keep telling yourself that if you leave, no one will love you or that the relationship is going well because it's your fault? Be honest with yourself and stop the negative self-talk.
13 You Don't Feel Good about Yourself
If you stopped feeling good about yourself as a result of your relationship, it's a sure sign you're unhappy in your relationship. We all have doubts and insecurities, but our partner and/or relationship isn't supposed to make us feel worse about ourselves.
14 You've Contemplated Cheating
This is a big, big sign that you're unhappy in your relationship. If you feel like you have to turn to somebody else, it isn't good. By this point, you and your partner barely communicate. If you find yourself opening up about your problems to another man, this is an example of an emotional affair! Of course, if you've thought about sleeping with someone else, it's time to face the facts: this current relationship isn't for you.
15 You Feel like You're Settling
If you know deep in your heart that your partner isn't "the one," you probably feel like you're settling in this relationship. It doesn't have to be that way! You deserve to find your happy ending and your partner deserves to know you feel - why continue to waste time on something that isn't making you happy? If you feel like there's something bigger and better out in the world, go find it.
16 Arguments Cut Short
Nobody likes to argue, that's a given. However, if you find yourself just cutting your partner off whenever he brings up an issue, it's because you don't care enough to resolve it. You've given up on fixing things and that's because you don't see a future with the two of you.
17 You're Tired of Your Routine
It's very easy for couples to fall into a routine. As convenient and cute as it was when it first started out, you've grown tired of always knowing exactly what's going to happen. Your life has become predictable and that's made you unhappy. You have to find a way to try and spice things up!
Now that you know what signs to watch out for in your relationship to tell if you are really unhappy, what are you going to do about it? Do you want to stay in an unhappy relationship?