If you and your partner are exactly the opposite and no matter what you do, you just can’t seem to agree on anything, then I must suggest a few very easy ways for introvert-extrovert couples to improve communication. Even though at first you loved that he or she was so different than you, over time those small differences can really test your patience and it can even make you question your compatibility. Try to realize that you can’t read minds, so you can’t possibly know what your significant other is thinking, especially if they are so different. Here are a few wonderful ways for introvert-extrovert couples to improve communication that will help you build a stronger relationship:
1. Understand What Being an Introvert/ Extrovert Means
One of the easiest ways for introvert-extrovert couples to improve communication is by understanding what introversion or extroversion means. There are a lot of standardized tests you could take to find out whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert or even an ambivert (which is actually a personality trait that includes both the qualities of introverts and extroverts). Then, try to understand your partner’s behavior by considering those traits which are specific to the category he or she belongs to.
2. Find out How Your Partner Recharges
The main difference between being an introvert and being an extrovert is the way they recharge their energy. While extroverts love to always be surrounded by a ton of people, introverts would rather stay alone most of the time. That doesn’t mean that they hate people or that they’re selfish and arrogant. They just get their energy from being alone, while extroverts get their energy from being with other people. Find out where your partner is coming from and try to create the right environment for them to excel, even if sometimes this means that you’ll have to make a few compromises.
3. Pick the Right Moment
When you need to talk about something important that has been bothering you for quite some time, try to pick the right moment, based on your partner’s best mood and not yours. If your partner is an introvert, you should give them some time to process that information, so it’s best to always give them a heads up before starting the conversation. If your significant other is an extrovert, they will want to talk things through, so make sure you have enough time to do that when you’re starting a new discussion topic.
4. Don’t Take It Personally
If your partner is not in the mood to go out or have friends over every night, don’t take it personally! It’s got nothing to do with you. They just need a little time to recharge their batteries and they can do this only when they’re alone if they are introverts. So, if they had a rough day at work, let them relax and don’t be so upset if they just want to stay at home and watch a movie on a Friday night. Once you understand in what ways you two differ and how you recharge your energy, you’ll realize that you need to make a few compromises, so that both of you can be happy.
5. Learn to Compromise
If you want your relationship to work, you’ll need to learn how to make compromises, especially if you are so different. Work together, so that both of you will be satisfied with your decisions. If you’re an introvert and your partner is the extrovert, then just make some time to talk things through every now and then and go out more often if that makes them happy. On the other hand, if you’re the extrovert, you should give your introvert partner some space once in a while, so they can recharge their energy. You’ll see how much those small compromises will improve your relationship and they won’t even take so much effort on your behalf.
6. See What You Can Learn from Your Partner
Try to appreciate how different you two are and see what you can learn from your partner! Since you two have different ways to view the world, try to take advantage of that because your partner’s influence can be precisely what makes you a better person. You two actually complete each other, so don’t be scared that you are so different. Different can in fact be good, so try to appreciate your partner for being who they are and give up on your constant desire to change them to better suit your needs.
7. Learn What Assertiveness Means
If you want to improve communication, no matter how different you two really are, then you should learn what assertiveness means and use this skill in all of your daily interactions. Respect your partner and at the same time, try to stand up for yourself in a manner that won’t hurt their feelings. There are a lot of books you could read on this topic that will surely help you increase your intimacy and improve your communication.
Once you understand where all those differences between the two of you come from, you’ll be more willing to accept your partner for who they are and you won’t try so hard to change them just to better suit your needs. Have you ever been or are you in an introvert-extrovert relationship? What do you do in order to improve your communication? What advice do you have for us? Do tell!