While we might think of plenty of reasons to call him first, we usually end up waiting so we don't seem clingy. The days of sitting idly by the phone waiting for him to call are over. It is okay to take charge and call first. I've found there are far more reasons to call him first than there are to wait.
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1. Guys like Assertive Women
They may not always admit it, but guys love assertive women who know what they want. One of the best reasons to call him first is to show him you have no problem going after what you want. In this case, it's him. Not only is it flattering, but it lets him know he's not dealing with a wishy washy kind of girl.
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An assertive approach can also set the tone for the relationship, positioning you as someone confident and decisive. This doesn't just pertain to calling him but in all aspects of dating and the relationship. Taking the initiative shows that you're not one to play games or dwell in uncertainties. Remember, assertiveness doesn't mean being aggressive or overwhelming; it's about being clear and honest with your intentions. It’s a refreshing change for many men, who are often expected to take the lead. Be bold, be brave, and you may just find it works in your favor.
2. Someone Has to Break the Ice
I have several male friends and you wouldn't believe how many rules they try to follow to seem both nonchalant and interested. The end result – no gets a phone call until it's too late. Stop waiting for some set period of time and break the ice yourself. It takes the pressure off both of you so you can continue getting to know each other.
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Playing by the "who texts who first" rule can be exhausting. Embrace a bit of that bold spirit and pick up the phone. Sure, it's a little scary, but isn't the prospect of moving forward and possibly finding something real worth that initial flutter of nerves? Plus, in the modern dating game, being straightforward is a breath of fresh air. It shows confidence and maturity - two incredibly attractive qualities. Trust me, a call from you might be just the signal he’s been hoping for.
Frequently asked questions
Absolutely! There's no reason to wait around. If you want to talk to him, just go for it. Confidence is attractive, and making the first move can show that you’re interested and proactive.
Understandable, but remember, calling him first doesn't make you desperate. In fact, it can show that you're confident and comfortable taking the initiative. If he's worth your time, he'll appreciate the gesture.
Think of calling him like talking to an old friend. Keep it light and casual. Maybe mention something funny or interesting that happened in your day. Authenticity is key; just be yourself!
If he doesn't answer or call back right away, it's not the end of the world. He could be busy or not have seen the call. Just give it some time. If he's interested, he’ll get back to you.
You don’t need an elaborate excuse to call. It's perfectly fine to call just because you wanted to hear his voice or check in. Casual, reasonless calls can actually be quite charming and spontaneous.
3. You like Him
This one should be obvious, but many women ignore it so they don't scare a guy away. If you like him, give him a call. It doesn't matter if it's the day after your first date. Call him and tell him you had a great time. Don't just sit and wonder if he likes you. Call him and find out, but leave it at one call until he calls you back to avoid sounding like a stalker.
4. He's Uncertain
Just because he's a guy, it doesn't mean he's confident. Odds are, if he really likes you, he's nervous about doing everything right. He may think it's too soon to call you or that maybe you didn't really like him. His indecision could mean you're left waiting for days or even weeks. Be certain for him. He'll appreciate it.
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Often, men grapple with the fear of rejection or are unsure if they've read the signs correctly. Perhaps he's replaying your last interaction, wondering if there was a hidden message in your goodbye. Don't let his uncertainty turn into silence. Taking the initiative to call can alleviate the pressure, giving him a clear sign of your interest. This small gesture could be just what he needs to put his anxieties to rest and start building a meaningful connection with you. Remember, empowerment starts with action.
5. It's Not the Dark Ages
Maybe girls were supposed to wait around for a guy to make the first move back in the '50s, but we're well past that now. Women actually ask guys out now. Why not be the first to call too? Forget about being the prim and proper lady and just call him. It's perfectly okay to show him you're a more modern woman.
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Embrace the empowerment and the equality that comes with breaking old stereotypes! If you're feeling the connection and you've got his number, trust your gut and dial away. Don't sit by the phone, checking every five minutes to see if he's called or texted. Take control of your dating life. Being bold and making the first move can be incredibly attractive, and shows you're confident and know what you want. Plus, it will set a tone for a relationship where communication is a two-way street. The ball is in your court—it's time to play the game by your own rules.
6. He May Have Lost Your Number
I know it's the oldest excuse in the book, but sometimes it does happen. Maybe the number didn't save right or he forget to take that slip of paper out of his pants before he washed them. The truth is, you never really know. If he promised to call, but it's been a few days, give him a call just to say hi. At least then you'll know he has your number now.
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It might feel a bit old-fashioned worrying about who should make the first move, but in this digital age of connectivity, accidents happen. Phones get lost, contacts get wiped—life is unpredictable! So, if you're itching to hear from him and nothing's happened yet, why sit and wonder? Picking up the phone could turn into the moment that reignites the spark. After all, if he's genuinely interested but held back by a tech mishap, your call could be a pleasant surprise that shows your interest and breaks down barriers to communication.
7. It's a Compliment
Any guy that likes you wonders whether you really like him or not. You may have gone out once or given him your number at the bar, but does it mean anything? When you call him first, it's the same as giving him a compliment. It tells him you are interested, which boosts his confidence and leads to him calling you more.
Girls are often taught that guys must call first. If any guy gets seriously offended because you call him first, then he probably has some control issues. Give him a call when you feel ready and stop worrying about who should call first. What do you think about the girl calling the guy first?
Comments
Ailsa:
Marwa: Still i think guys should call first but Nice article tho
Cee: I used to agree with alot of you commenters about not calling first. However I later found my partner to enjoy when I call him because it lets him know I miss him, my affection and that we are equal. Waiting on him is good now and again but taking control and he'll respect you more
Bessie: I think guys should call first. No man wants a woman coming after him, he feels a sense of accomplishment when he is the one that wins you over.
Abigail: Noooooo let him call first. check out Mimi Tanner, Calling Men and youll see why
Kitty: I am in this exact situation. Umming and ahhing about whether to talk to him. This advice is great thank you!!
Miriam: Nowadays people don't call that much... It's a little awkward for me when taking on the phone because I'm used to texting :)
Lottee: guys should call first :) it doesn't feel that good when we call first. :)
Chelsea: Only call first if you're desperate, or if you know for sure the more sexy one in the partnership. Always have a deafening sense of undeniable sexy.
Isabella: I say us girls should make more effort - if you really like/love him, just call him! If you have the guts, ask him out - sometimes guys need a little push and then they'll realise what they want!
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