By Lyndsie • 20 Comments
Make the first move, girls! It's 2013, there are tons of reasons why it's perfectly acceptable for you to ask the guy or girl of your dreams on a date – or to marry you, for that matter. Some women have different ideas in terms of propriety and dating etiquette, which is fine. However, we live in a world where you're duty bound to embrace your destiny, go after what you want, and make your dreams come true rather than waiting for them to magically come to fruition. Emily Post is no longer the end-all, be-all, and while some of those ideas have their place, others are now antiquated and even a little insulting. If it's in your personality to do so and you're tired of waiting around for things to happen, make the first move. You won't regret it!
I made this point already, but it's honestly one of the best reasons to make the first move. It's a modern age. By all means, if you're the type of girl who feels more comfortable with men who make the first move, don't change yourself – I'm not advocating that. However, if you've been chafing at the bit waiting for the men or women you like to step up and ask you out, why wait?
Besides, equality is awesome – and it hasn't come far enough yet. You deserve to get paid as much as any man, you deserve as much respect as any man, and you deserve all the same chances available to men. The reverse is true too, so why should guys bear the brunt of the responsibility? If all things are equal, let the guys sweat it a bit; let them worry if you're going to ask for a date.
Many girls and women have regrettably been told that making the first move makes them come off as desperate, needy, and even masculine. I suppose there are some men who feel that way, but doesn't that seem antiquated to you, and a little insulting? Who comes up with those kinds of labels anyway? You're not desperate if you ask out someone you like, and you're certainly not butch or masculine. You're a woman and a person who knows what she wants. The end.
The world is moving at an increasingly fast paced. While slow courtships certainly have their place, there's no need to wait around forever to see if a guy is going to ask you out before the next ice age. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet. If you're flirting with someone and you're equally into each other, why wait around?
Even if you're worried that you'll come off as too pushy by making the first move, you can't argue that confidence is sexy. When you're confident enough to ask out the guy or girl you've been fantasizing over, that's just attractive. To me it says that you're assertive and self assured, not clingy or confrontational.
Besides that, you'll inspire others if you take the initiative. You may inspire other women to make the first move themselves, and you'll even inspire the guys around you. They'll see that there's no harm in being shy or unsure themselves, because there are women out there who are perfectly comfortable with making the first approach.
At the end of the day, however, the best reason to make the first move – or to wait – is simple: it's your life. Do what makes you comfortable. Take the path that feels right to you. Choose what works and go for it, even it means being assertive and going after what you want.
Making the first move is no longer the sole domain of men. You know what you want; going after it does not make you seem desperate, needy, clingy, masculine (that's particularly laughable), or forceful. It makes you simply you; a woman alive and thriving in a modern age. Have you ever asked someone out before? How did it go?