It can be tough to deal when you and your boyfriend are not talking. It can feel stressful, upsetting, and feel as if things may never be right in your world again. These are some suggestions of things you can do when you and your boyfriend are not talking, to make it easier for you to handle that (hopefully very brief) time period.
1. Give Him Time to Think
Generally, if you and your boyfriend are not talking, there has been an argument or disagreement of some sort. That can feel very overwhelming to some guys (and to us!). They generally need more time than we do to process their thoughts and emotions after a conflict. So one good thing to do is back off a little when you and your boyfriend are not talking. It's a better option than forcing the issue when he isn’t ready and making the argument bigger.
2. Consider Your Part in the Disagreement
It can be wise to consider your part in the disagreement when you and your boyfriend are not talking. Consider if perhaps you were wrong. Think about if you said things you wish you hadn’t. Taking responsibility for your part in an argument is a mature action. It doesn’t mean it's all your fault, but that you'll own up to your part.
3. Think about What You Want to Say
It's also good to think about what you want to say when you and your boyfriend do talk again. Think about the main ideas that you want to share. Here is a little secret, ladies: Endless details will be lost on a man. Think about only the most important points you want to get across, so you're prepared when you do talk.
4. Talk to a Friend
It can be good to hash through the situation with a wise friend. They can give you an outside opinion and even bring things to light you may not have considered. Sometimes a friend who's a bit older and more experienced can be helpful in this. Your mom or an aunt may even be an option. Just be sure to choose someone you respect and who seems to know what she's doing in her own romantic relationships.
5. Go Have Some Fun
There's no need to sit around moping and crying when you and your boyfriend aren’t talking. While you may be upset at first, continuing to dwell on the situation can only make you feel worse. Getting out can help get your mind off of it. Meet a girlfriend for lunch or go shopping. The situation may seem much milder after getting out.
6. Let Him Miss You
Here is secret number two, loves. It's good to let your guy miss you a little bit. Of course you can call and text and reach out to him; we're modern women. But sometimes it'[s also good to let him miss you, especially when you're in the middle of an argument.
7. Reevaluate the Relationship
It's also wise to take the time you aren’t talking to reevaluate your relationship a little bit. Are there any red flags you should be seeing? Is it a normal disagreement that most couples might have? Or is it an argument you're having because your boyfriend is controlling, selfish or overly jealous? Evaluating the relationship is sometimes important to do.
These are 7 things you can do when you and your boyfriend are not talking. What do you do when you are in this situation? What’s your advice to other girls?
Frequently Asked Questions
- Why isn't my boyfriend talking to me?
- Sweetie, there could be so many reasons! Maybe he's stressed, upset, or just needs some space. It's important not to jump to conclusions. A little patience can go a long way.
- What should I do if my boyfriend and I aren't talking?
- First, try to stay calm. Give it a little time, then reach out with a kind and gentle message. Let him know you're open to talking when he's ready. Sometimes, a little nudge can help.
- How can I communicate better with my boyfriend?
- Effective communication is key! Try to be honest but kind. Express your feelings without blaming or accusing. And most importantly, listen to his side too. It's a two-way street!
- What if my boyfriend doesn't talk to me for days after a fight?
- That's really tough, I know. Space can be good, but it's not okay to leave you hanging for too long. When the dust settles, have a heart-to-heart about how both of you can handle conflicts better in the future.
- I feel like I can't talk to my boyfriend. What should I do?
- Oh, honey, that's hard. If you feel like you can't talk to him, that needs addressing. Maybe start with small, non-confrontational topics and gradually build up to more serious ones. Consider couples' counseling if it's a persistent problem.