Breakups can be hard, especially if they are marking the end of a long term relationship. There are some types of hookups after a breakup that you might fall into. But are they a good idea?
When you are feeling lonely, vulnerable and are looking for something to dull your emotions temporarily, one of the easiest things to do is go out and look for a hookup to put a band aid over your breakup. Hookups are super common, but something that you might not realise at the time, is that there are distinct types of hookups. Here are five different types of hookups after a breakup that you should be aware of.
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The first hook up is always the most difficult one, for a variety of different reasons. First of all, you might be out of practise when it comes to flirting and making a new romantic connection. Secondly, the pain of your breakup might still be raw. Thirdly, it can be tough to get the thought of your ex out of your head, the way they liked to be touched, the things that they did to you, etc. At the same time, you can be proud that you are finally trying to move forward. This is one of the types of hookups after a breakup that you need to think about carefully.
There is a tendency to try to hook up with the one person who you had a spark with, but never did anything about because your now ex came along at the same time. It’s always tempting to go back and try to revisit that chemistry because it dates back to a time before your ex was even around.
When you are heartbroken, something that you will want to do is go back for a fling with an old and available flame because there is something about the familiarity and comfort that you crave, instead of trying to start fresh with a completely new person. It’s like slipping back in to an old pair of slippers. It doesn’t take as much effort as finding new ones, but it feels just as good!
We are constantly told to put ourselves back out there on the market to get over a breakup, and this can often lead to going out for the night, getting way too drunk to both dull the pain and fight the nerves, and ending up in bed with somebody that you only just met a few hours before. If both of you have fun and don’t expect more from each other than a simple hookup, then that’s fine, but be careful not to use a person just for their body when you are feeling vulnerable and needy, nor allow yourself to be used without being fully aware that is what is happening.
After you have experienced all of these hookups, you will finally get to one that feels a bit different. It will feel different because it means more than sex, and you realise that this person has actually helped you to start believing in romance and having feelings again. This one is definitely worth pursuing!