It can be hard to deal with a huge fight, especially when emotions start to get out of control. No one wants to make a fight bigger than it already is. However, the situation can remain under control as along as both parties follow a few simple rules. Here’s a few recommendations on how to deal with a huge fight.
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Don’t Be Aggressive
One way to deal with a huge fight is to not be aggressive. Sometimes it’s easier said than done when tempers are flaring but being cool, calm and collected will get you a lot further. Rather than raising your voice, cutting the person off or even resorting to name calling, try to maintain a conversational tone the entire time. You’ll find that you will get to the root of the problem much faster
Don’t Point Fingers
When in an argument, try to use “I” phrases rather than “you” phrases. For example, say things like “I felt” or “I thought” rather than starting sentences with phrases like “you said” or “you did.” Sticking to this rule will make the other person feel less offended and make them less defensive or confrontational.
Listen More than You Speak
Although you want to say everything that’s on your mind to get your point across, remember that the other person does as well. Instead of rambling and making things bigger than they really are, try listen to what the other person has to say. You’ll have a better idea of how they feel and you can say things to better address how they are feeling so you can hopefully diffuse the situation faster.
Don’t Let It Get Physical
Unfortunately, some verbal arguments take a turn for the worst and become physical arguments. Whether you’re stronger or weaker than your opponent doesn’t make you right or wrong. In fact, physical fighting will never resolve an argument since it doesn’t address the root cause or the solution. Next time it feels like you might be headed towards a physical confrontation just walk away. It gives you and the other person time to cool down, collect your thoughts and resolve the fight later on when emotions aren’t as volatile.
Accept an Apology
Sometimes all you want from the other person is an apology but it takes several twists and turns in an argument before you can get one. Furthermore, sometimes the entire situation wasn’t addressed or you’re still feeling upset about the issue. Regardless, if the person you’re arguing with offers a sincere apology, accept it because you’ll both be on the path to recovery.
Give an Apology
It takes a lot of pride to give an apology, especially if you still believe you had some valid points during the argument. However, giving a genuine apology helps to diffuse the situation fast. In addition, when you offer an apology most likely the other person will offer one as well. However, never apologize if you don’t mean it because fake apologies are usually transparent and will make the other person even more upset.
After a big fight you’ll be tempted to tell your friends. If you really need to get it off your chest, tell only your close friends whom you can trust not to spread the gossip around. Secondly, try to stick only to facts and not to exaggerate the story in your favour or to make the other person look aggressive, silly or insincere. However, the best way to avoid any future issues is by keeping the details of your argument between the two of you.
Fights can be emotionally and mentally draining. That’s why we try to avoid them to the best of our ability. But sometimes they still arise regardless of your attempts. Remember, it’s natural to have fights will people but it’s important to keep them under control. What are other ways to deal with a huge fight?
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