Talking dirty is sexy and hot and arousing … but it can also be painfully embarrassing and horrifyingly awkward if you're nervous or if you've never done it before. I mean, sexy phrases sometimes sound so ludicrous when you say them out loud, don't they? Can you ever imagine telling somebody to pound you hard and cum on your tits? Well, some of you probably can – some people are so skilled at talking dirty that they're like sexual orators. Others stumble all over themselves and accidentally end up saying the most un-sexy things possible. This post is for those girls – all the girls who are much too nervous to try talking dirty. I got you, ladies.
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Forget Watching Porn 📺, It's Time to Read Some Erotica 📚
Research is the key anytime you learn something new, and that counts for dirty talk, too. It probably seems like porn is the perfect place to learn how to bring some verbal raunch into the bedroom 🛌, but … yeah, no, it's not. In much of today's porn, the dialogue is so corny 🌽, fake, and unnatural that it's impossible to take it seriously. Erotica, on the other hand, relies on language. The words are an integral part of the arousal, and there's often fantastic dialogue.
Instead of imitating those awkward scripts, dive into a steamy novel or a saucy short story. Here, characters express their desires and fantasies in ways that can truly fire up your imagination. Use what you read as inspiration to craft your own sultry phrases. With erotic literature, you'll discover a variety of ways to articulate what you want and how you want it. Plus, it's a totally judgment-free zone to explore what turns you on. So, light some candles, cozy up with a book, and let the sensual words whisper new skills into your bedroom vocabulary.
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Sexts 📲 Are the Perfect Jumping-off Point for Your Foray into Dirty Talk
Starting small is often helpful. If you're eager to become fluent in a dirtier dialect of the language of love 💓, just text. Texting 📲 makes it easier to talk about certain things in general. Talking dirty through text lets you ease your way into it. It's less embarrassing when you aren't face-to-face, and since you have time to think 💭 before you write, you won't feel quite as nervous. Besides, sexting 💬 is a great way to flirt with your partner – it excites both of you!
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Find out Your Partner's Trigger Words
We all have words and phrases and descriptions of sexual acts that particularly arouse 😍 us. Most men and women like specific words for each other's genitalia 🍑🍌 and descriptions of what they'll do to each other. Everyone also has preferences – a guy might prefer the word “dick,” a woman might dislike the word “pussy.” Hearing them gives us a jolt and a tingle. They make us squirm a little. Those are the words you want to use when you're talking dirty. Your partner might even be aroused 😅 by something you specifically say – and it doesn't even have to be sexual! Heather pronounces “milk” like “melk” so it rhymes with “elk,” and something about her accent with that word just bakes my biscuits.
To unlock your partner's peak desire, play the word detective. Ask them directly or turn it into a flirtatious game to discover their hot-button vocabulary. Perhaps the unexpected, like "silk" or "whisper," will send shivers down their spine. Remember, what works in romance novels or adult films might not sync with your bedroom reality. Equally important is noting the off-limits words—those that may be a turn-off or trigger unpleasant feelings. Keeping the communication open and respectful ensures your dirty talk is a delightful addition rather than a distracting misstep.
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Talk about What You Want in Excruciatingly Exquisite Detail
Here's a secret: your partner more than likely loves ❤️ hearing 👂 about what turns you on and what you want her or him to do. If you're at a loss and don't know how to get started, it's the perfect place. It gets easier as time goes on, but even if you're not super detailed at first, letting your partner know where you want to be touched or what position you want to try is enough on its own.
Lean into the thrilling anticipation by whispering the specifics – the gentle brush of fingertips trailing your skin, the intensity in their gaze as they explore your curves, or the shiver-inducing whisper of sweet nothings against your ear. Make it a vivid narrative, relishing in the minutiae, from the texture of the linens beneath you to the varied cadences of heavy breathing. By painting a detailed picture, you cultivate an intimate space where fantasies come alive, emboldening yourself and your partner to embrace the joys of sexual communication and exploration.
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Voice Your Feelings and Your Arousal Loud and Proud
Letting your partner know s/he's doing a good job is a turn-on. It's also another fantastic starting place if you're not sure what to say 🗣 next. If you're about to orgasm 🤗 , say so. Do you find something your partner's doing particularly pleasing? Let her or him know. Not only is it sexy, but it practically guarantees your lover will do it again in the future. 🙌
Communication in the bedroom can elevate the entire experience. Murmuring sweet nothings, or perhaps something a little more daring, can intensify the connection between you and your partner. Don't be shy to express your desires or to give a little instructional guidance if there's a specific way you like to be touched or kissed. Remember, consent and comfort are paramount; keep the dialogue open and respectful. This encourages a safe environment where both you and your partner feel valued and heard — and where your pleasure can truly flourish.
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Silence at the proper season is wisdom, and better than any speech.
Announce What You're Going to do
This subject matter is exciting for both partners, as well. It's also the perfect way to take the lead if you want to be the aggressor. Talking 🗣 about it – again, in as much detail as you can muster – increases the anticipation, keeping your partner turned on and on edge. It's that much sweeter and even more satisfactory 👌 when you finally do what you described.
Verbalizing your intentions heightens the mood, transforming the atmosphere into a steamy playbook of desire. By explicitly detailing your next move, you create a tantalizing trail toward climax. Whether it's whispering in their ear or sending a provocative text, the raw honesty of your words can shatter inhibitions. Make each sentence drip with promise, painting each touch, kiss, or caress long before your hands make their journey. This not only builds confidence in your dirty talk repertoire but ensures that your partner is aching with anticipation, hanging onto every seductive promise you make.
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Master the Art of One-word Dirty Talk
It's perfectly acceptable to talk dirty using one word at a time, which is perfect for girls 👭 who are nervous 😥 about doing it. You can reveal what you like, give a demand, and encourage your partner with just one word. “Yes,” “harder,” “more,” “deeper,” “slower,” and “faster” are all options, plus there's a whole host of dirty words and epithets at your disposal.
Do you talk 🗯 dirty in bed? What are some of the words and phrases you use to drive someone wild?
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