Being cheated on is THE worst so you need tips for dealing with being cheated on. When trust is violated, it makes you question if anything in your relationship was real. Did he really love you? What did that girl have that you didn’t? Was she prettier? More fun? Getting stepped out on will wreak havoc on your emotions and if you’re not careful, you could even slide into a depression. Fortunately, you CAN and WILL survive this! Here’s how to cope when he cheated.
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1. Get Mad
One of the best tips for dealing with being cheated on is to get really mad. Yes, you read that correctly. Get M-A-D. In order to get past this feeling, you have to let your emotions run their course. If you try to bury them, eventually the pain will become too much to bear and you will explode. To begin the healing process you have to acknowledge how you feel and allow yourself to process it. Cry. Yell. Vent to your best friends. Sing “Before He Cheats” at a karaoke bar. Get all the anger out (without doing anything illegal, please), but remember you can’t stay mad forever. It’s not going to be easy, but the goal is to put one foot in front of the other so you can move past this.
2. Stop Blaming Yourself
When you found out that your boyfriend slept with someone else behind your back, one of the first things you probably did was blame yourself. You probably thought about what you could've done differently and how this all could've been avoided. Maybe he wouldn’t have cheated if you didn’t argue? Or if you cooked dinner more often or wore sexier clothes? The real answer is none of the above, honey. Please believe, IT’S NOT YOU. You could be as as beautiful as Beyonce, but if a man has his mind made up to cheat, there’s very little you can do to stop him (cue Jay Z’s 4:44 album to back this claim).
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3. Don’t Compare Yourself to Her
As tempting as it is to stalk her Instagram page to find clues as to why your man chose to cheat - don’t. Not only will you drive yourself crazy, you’ll keep this horrible situation at the forefront of your life, which will make it impossible to get over. As much as you would like to, you’re not going to be able to get into his head to figure out why he did what he did. Just know that even though he was unfaithful, that in no way means she’s a better person/lover/friend than you are.
4. Get Back to You
Falling in love is an exciting experience and as a couple, it’s natural that your lives merge. But now that it’s over, it’s time to get back into yourself and feel good while doing it! Start nurturing your hobbies and interests. Try a new exercise class. Start meditating or go hiking. Do the things you liked to do on your own before you were a couple, plus some. Get to know yourself for the awesome person that you are and remember, what happened doesn’t define you!
5. Forgive Him
Yeah, this one is gonna take some time so don't worry, you don’t have to rush it. But as much as you are hurting now, at some point you are going to have to let this go. To quote Buddha, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else. You are the one who gets burned." Yes he cheated, and it sucks. But remember, it’s his mistake, not yours. The best thing you can do is hold your head up high, and keep living your best life!
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Lisa: Depressing
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