Wondering how judgment can affect your relationship?
There are common pitfalls in a romantic relationship, like poor communication, dishonesty, lack of trust, and the most important, not giving the relationship a priority.
But there is another behavior that can wreak havoc on a relationship. Relationship expert Margaret Paul,PhD., explains the one thing that erodes intimacy in every relationship. That tendency is judgment – both self-judgment and judgment of others.
And she asserts that it’s one of the major causes of relationship problems. "Our ego often believes that self-judgment and judgment of others, motivates change,” notes Paul.
Whethter you are judging your partner or judging yourself, the result of that judgment will be feelings insecurity, anxiety and shame, closing off the ability to offer yourself freely and openly to love, thus eroding intimacy. That's one answer to how judgment can affect your relatioship.
“Judgment, either outward or inward, shuts us off from sharing positive emotions," Paul explains. So, what should I do to avoid judgments and nurture my relationship? Paul suggests becoming more mindful of your thoughts.
“You have the choice to shift your thoughts to acceptance, compassion and forgiveness," she says.
“When you are accepting of yourself or others, have compassion and forgiveness for yourself and for others for making mistakes and being human, your heart is open."