Never Ask a Same-Sex Couple These Ridiculous Questions ...

Heather

Never Ask a Same-Sex Couple These Ridiculous Questions ...
Never Ask a Same-Sex Couple These Ridiculous Questions ...

When I came out as gay and I revealed that I had a girlfriend (now my wife!), I got asked ALL sorts of questions, from who is more butch all the way to why do I want the right to get married. If you aren't gay, you might not realize that these questions are offensive … but they are. Pay attention and be more aware!

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1. To a Lesbian Couple: Are You Two Going to Adopt?

To a Lesbian Couple: Are You Two Going to Adopt? No. We both have the parts to have a baby. We might just need a 'friend' to provide the sperm.

2. Who is Going to Propose?

Who is Going to Propose? Best part about a same-sex couple? Either person can propose!

Frequently asked questions

3. Do You Have Real Sex?

Do You Have Real Sex? As … opposed to fantasy?

4. To a Lesbian Couple: Can We Have a Threesome?

To a Lesbian Couple: Can We Have a Threesome? How about no.

5. So Which One of You is Butch?

So Which One of You is Butch? How about, both of us are equally butch. And manly. And we don't fight over who is taking out the trash.

6. Who's in Charge, the Top or the Bottom?

Who's in Charge, the Top or the Bottom? It's your business … how?

7. Do You Really Have … Butt Sex?

Do You Really Have … Butt Sex? Yes. We do.

8. Why do You Need to Get Married?

Why do You Need to Get Married? How about because it's our right?

9. To a Gay Couple: do You Plan to Have Kids?

To a Gay Couple: do You Plan to Have Kids? Yes. Why wouldn't we?

10. Aren't You Scared of Your Kids Being Made Fun of Being Raised by a Same-sex Couple?

Aren't You Scared of Your Kids Being Made Fun of Being Raised by a Same-sex Couple? Nope. The world is changing.

11. To a Lesbian Couple: What about Male Influence for Your Kids?

To a Lesbian Couple: What about Male Influence for Your Kids? Our kids will be well-rounded and well-adjusted, just like yours.

12. To a Lesbian Couple: Have You Ever Had Sex with a Man?

To a Lesbian Couple: Have You Ever Had Sex with a Man? So, so offensive.

13. Are You Scared of Turning Your Kids Gay?

Are You Scared of Turning Your Kids Gay? This. I want this.

14. Do Your Parents Approve of Your Relationship?

Do Your Parents Approve of Your Relationship? Because that's your business too.

15. Is It True That You Cheat on Each Other All the Time?

Is It True That You Cheat on Each Other All the Time? Because that's a stereotype right?

16. For Bi-sexual Couples: if You Break up, Are You Going to Switch Sexes?

For Bi-sexual Couples: if You Break up, Are You Going to Switch Sexes? Maybe, maybe not.

17. For Bi-sexual Couples: since You Are Dating a Girl, Why Aren't You Labeled a Lesbian?

For Bi-sexual Couples: since You Are Dating a Girl, Why Aren't You Labeled a Lesbian? Because I like guys too, but right now I like this girl.

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Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I don't think I've ever heard the stereotype "gays and lesbians cheat more", but I like this article, it's a good read

I can understand how the person being asked can be offended by these things but as humans we are curious. We are especially curious about things that we see as different or we simply don't understand. That curiosity comes out as questions. We can only hope that by asking questions and receiving answers we increase our understanding. And through understanding comes acceptance. I also think that our lack of understanding and ignorance brings fear and that is why things against the "norm" create such issues. Maybe you shouldn't take offence at the question but understand why it's being asked and take the opportunity to educate the person who asked. Remove the opportunity for something to be seen and be judged as abnormal. 

@k-dizzel YES peopl were born gay. It's NOT a choice. You like who uou like. Love is not a choice. Attraction is not a choice. Sexual orientation is not a choice. Trust me, nobody would want to be gay if they had a choice. Nobody wants to be bullied or assaulted for liking the same gender and not being the straight norm. I would give up being gay in a heartbeat to get back the days I got bullied and all the times I've been threatened with "you just need to be with the right penis to make you love men" or the left out feeling from being an outcast in my shitty childhood neighborhood where being gay got you beat up anytime anybody wanted to. But I can't become straight, just like you can't suddenly become gay. Because I love girls. I am gay. I was born gay. And that is not a choice.

@k-dizzel I still can't believe people choose to live a straight lifestyle. (Do you hear the sarcasm?) Do you not comprehend how idiotic and ignorant your comment sounded?

Thanks for this post! I've never asked these questions but I'm still happy to know what to avoid!

@rhondajames nobody said it was only gay couples who get asked stupid things, but I can definitely tell you nobody asked me how I had sex or told me I just needed to find the right man before I came out. Nobody asked me any of these. After coming out and finding a partner I get asked almost daily half of these questions.

All of these questions make sense to ask!!!!

@k-dizzle, it definitely isn't a choice.

@gjp except we live in an age where you don't need to offend someone. Asking someone who you know well, or even asking Google. None of these are the same answer per couple anyways. Strangers do not need to know how I have sex or how/if I'll have a child. If someone I know we'll, and have been friends with for a while then whatever, as long as they ask nicely and don't get rude if I don't want to answer. But the key point is strangers vs good friends. Would you tell strangers everything equally to your best friend?

I have never asked anyone such a stupid question but then it is just as bad as asking a heterosexual couple when they are going to have children its like leave people alone to live their lives ...