When I came out as gay and I revealed that I had a girlfriend (now my wife!), I got asked ALL sorts of questions, from who is more butch all the way to why do I want the right to get married. If you aren't gay, you might not realize that these questions are offensive … but they are. Pay attention and be more aware!
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1. To a Lesbian Couple: Are You Two Going to Adopt?
No. We both have the parts to have a baby. We might just need a 'friend' to provide the sperm.
2. Who is Going to Propose?
Best part about a same-sex couple? Either person can propose!
3. Do You Have Real Sex?
As … opposed to fantasy?
4. To a Lesbian Couple: Can We Have a Threesome?
How about no.
If you're looking to engage your partner in intriguing conversations, why not try some hypothetical questions for couples? These fun queries will not only keep the conversation lively but also stimulate deep thoughts and potentially reveal insights about each other's personality and thought processes.
5. So Which One of You is Butch?
How about, both of us are equally butch. And manly. And we don't fight over who is taking out the trash.
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6. Who's in Charge, the Top or the Bottom?
It's your business … how?
7. Do You Really Have … Butt Sex?
Yes. We do.
8. Why do You Need to Get Married?
How about because it's our right?
9. To a Gay Couple: do You Plan to Have Kids?
Yes. Why wouldn't we?
10. Aren't You Scared of Your Kids Being Made Fun of Being Raised by a Same-sex Couple?
Nope. The world is changing.
11. To a Lesbian Couple: What about Male Influence for Your Kids?
Our kids will be well-rounded and well-adjusted, just like yours.
12. To a Lesbian Couple: Have You Ever Had Sex with a Man?
So, so offensive.
13. Are You Scared of Turning Your Kids Gay?
This. I want this.
14. Do Your Parents Approve of Your Relationship?
Because that's your business too.
15. Is It True That You Cheat on Each Other All the Time?
Because that's a stereotype right?
16. For Bi-sexual Couples: if You Break up, Are You Going to Switch Sexes?
Maybe, maybe not.
17. For Bi-sexual Couples: since You Are Dating a Girl, Why Aren't You Labeled a Lesbian?
Because I like guys too, but right now I like this girl.
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Comments
RhondaJames: People will be people. I agree with Peony. It's no different to asking heteros stupid questions. Singling out same sex makes it appear they are the only ones to have to deal with such crap. Not true!
peony: I have never asked anyone such a stupid question but then it is just as bad as asking a heterosexual couple when they are going to have children its like leave people alone to live their lives ...
Veronica: All of these questions make sense to ask!!!!
Kim: Assuming people who live together are a couple just because theirs 2 of them. They could be friends who just want to save money by living together instead of alone.
Sev: When people ask me things like this I counter with asking about their sex lives. Usually starting with "so we've both established you think I'm not an equal human" to make them more uncomfortable. And as for the lesbian having kids, you don't need a friend. Test tube babies are a thing and so are sperm banks. If a single lady can get pregnant, so can a lesbian.
Heather: @k-dizzle, it definitely isn't a choice.
Allyfedor: I don't think I've ever heard the stereotype "gays and lesbians cheat more", but I like this article, it's a good read
Dani: Thanks for this post! I've never asked these questions but I'm still happy to know what to avoid!
Sev: @gjp except we live in an age where you don't need to offend someone. Asking someone who you know well, or even asking Google. None of these are the same answer per couple anyways. Strangers do not need to know how I have sex or how/if I'll have a child. If someone I know we'll, and have been friends with for a while then whatever, as long as they ask nicely and don't get rude if I don't want to answer. But the key point is strangers vs good friends. Would you tell strangers everything equally to your best friend?
Sev: @rhondajames nobody said it was only gay couples who get asked stupid things, but I can definitely tell you nobody asked me how I had sex or told me I just needed to find the right man before I came out. Nobody asked me any of these. After coming out and finding a partner I get asked almost daily half of these questions.
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