I've interviewed thousands of women. As a Matchmaker, it’s my job to meet droves of women and get a sense of who they are and what they’re looking for. I find out more from them in 5 minutes than a man would on 5 dates! Most women think they know what they want, but they really don't. When I ask a woman what she's looking for in a man, she'll tell me she wants someone tall, dark, and handsome. But when I ask her about her previous relationships and men she’s been most happy with, you'll see that's not always true. Men are visual and fall in love through their eyes. They’re shallow and superficial. However, women fall in love through their ears. We care more about the whole package. We value a man’s personality and how he treats us.
Snapshot Survey
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1. Personality Matters
Personality is very important. All women want to date a man with a great personality. Women want a man who’s kind and caring. We want someone to come home to at the end of the day who is our best friend. Women want a partner, an equal. Above all, we want someone who makes us feel great.
2. Intelligence is Sexy
Women are captivated by smart men. We like someone who we can learn from. We want you to inform us about the newest restaurant opening or tell us something we didn’t know about baseball. We’re attracted to a man who can teach us something. Women enjoy feeling enlightened.
Frequently asked questions
3. Humor is Key
Being funny makes you more attractive to women. There’s no science to it, it’s just a fact. 100 percent of women appreciate a man who is witty. If a woman wasn’t sure if she would like a man, but he’s funny, she’ll almost always give him a chance.
4. Confidence is a Turn on
Women like men who are confident. When you're sure of yourself, and your actions show that, women are naturally drawn to you. Women are attracted to men who know they're great.
5. Be Charismatic
Charisma is defined as having swagger, being spunky, possessing a certain je ne sais crois, or my personal favorite, not seeming vanilla-like. Whichever definition you prefer, all women love a man who is charming. When you have a big personality, women find you irresistible.
6. Practice Balance
Leading a balanced lifestyle is important. Women enjoy dating a man who can do it all. We want to date someone who can prioritize his job, family, friends, and a relationship. We’re drawn to men who make time for us and show us that we’re an essential part of their life.
7. Show You’re a Good Listener
A man who is a good listener is a true catch. Because women are more emotional than men, we love to share. We can talk for hours. We have tons of stories to tell and we want you to listen to all of them. If you can listen to a woman, and I mean genuinely listen, pat yourself on the back.
8. Display Thoughtfulness
Women are enticed by thoughtful men. Being thoughtful doesn't mean whisking us away to Miami on a third date. Although we'd certainly love that, it isn’t necessary! Being thoughtful means showing us that you care. If we mention we love a certain restaurant, surprise us and plan a date there. If we say we love a particular flower, bring us flowers on the next date. If we tell you that we’re eager to see a specific movie or play, get tickets and take us. A man who's considerate is very sexy.
9. Go with the Flow
We want to date someone we can bring anywhere. If we’re at a business dinner at Per Se, we want to date a man who can go with the flow and be fancy. When clients invite us to a box at a sports game, we want to date someone who can keep up with the lingo. I won’t give you ten more examples because hopefully you get the point! We enjoy dating men who can be comfortable in any situation.
10. Be Presentable
Being put together and looking presentable is essential. Women want to date a man who is well dressed. A nice outfit can make you so much more attractive! I’m personally a sucker for a man in a nice suit or a colored button down with a sweater. If you’re well dressed and put together, you’re showing the world that you value yourself and how you look.
At the end of the day, women want to fall in love. We want someone who makes us feel special and important.
So ladies, what do you really want in a man? Share your ideal man!
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