You might've kicked your cheating boyfriend to the curb and want to make a relationship with someone new work, even though you have leftover trust issues. Or maybe you've decided you love your disloyal boyfriend too much to end things and are trying to work through your issues. Either way, there are ways you can learn to trust again after being cheated on. Here are a few techniques to use:
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1. Communicate More Often
Your imagination will run wild if your boyfriend won't return your texts, of if his car isn't in his driveway when it should be. That's why you should always tell each other what your plans for the day are. Explain where you're going and who you'll be with, just like a child would do with a parent. That way, you'll feel like you're in the loop and you'll stop daydreaming about him running around with other women.
2. Be Blunt about What Makes You Uncomfortable
If your partner really wants your relationship to work, they'll do whatever they can to make you feel safe. That's why you should be honest with them about what makes you feel uncomfortable. If you're not happy about their friendship with an ex, tell them. You'll either work through the problem or end the relationship, but either way you'll be happier.
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3. Establish a "No Hiding Policy"
It's unhealthy to snoop through your partner's phone when they leave the room. However, it's also unhealthy to have a lock on your phone to prevent your partner from looking at it. The best thing to do is make an agreement that you can look at each other's phone or computer whenever you'd like. That way, you'll both feel like you have nothing to hide. Besides, the temptation to look will go away once you're actually given permission to do it.
4. Look at Yourself
Don't become so paranoid that you get scared whenever your man looks at another woman. You look at men all the time, but does that mean you want to cheat? The next time your man does something small that makes you question his loyalty to you, ask yourself if you've done the same thing before you start a fight.
5. Spend More Time Together
The more time you spend with your partner one-on-one, the more you'll grow to trust them. Once you see how much fun you're having together, and realize that they don't want anyone else but you, then it'll be easier for you to trust them.
6. Move past Your Doubts
Cheating is a major crime against the heart. It takes time to heal from such a big injustice, which is why you should be patient with yourself. It's normal for you to wonder if your man is doing you wrong. However, if you truly love him and know he will never hurt you like you've been hurt in the past, you'll move past the doubts that you have about him and make the relationship work.
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It's crucial to communicate openly about your concerns, allowing your partner to reassure you through their actions and consistency. Building trust involves letting go of past grievances and focusing on the positive aspects of your current relationship. Surround yourself with friends and loved ones who encourage your healing journey, offering perspective and support. Engage in activities that boost your self-esteem and help you feel in control of your emotions. Remember, trust is rebuilt slowly, step by step, with mutual effort and understanding. With patience and commitment from both sides, doubts will fade, paving the way for a stronger, more resilient bond.
7. A Different Person is a Fresh Start
The cold hard truth is that most relationships fall apart after someone cheats. If you have a hard time trusting your boyfriend after he sleeps with someone else, you might have an easier time trusting someone new in a different relationship. Sure, cheating can scar you, which means that you might still be insecure in a new relationship. However, you can remind yourself that your ex was the one who hurt you, not your current partner. You can't take out your frustration on someone who'.
Anyone who cheats on someone as amazing as you doesn't know what they're missing. Have you ever been cheated on? What have you done to start trusting again?
Comments
Allana: My husband cheated on me..... For a few yrs. I tried to work it out but I just couldn't forget....... We have since separated n I am now dating again for the past 6mth.....it's hard to trust..... I am trying.
Erica: 10 yr relationship cheater gave him many chances to fix it for me for family until I decided that I was worthy of something so much better and he is amazing. I can say thank you to my ex. Move on because staying with a cheater is only hurting you and they will not value you if you stay they will feel that they can do anything to you and you don't care about yourself if you let them get away with it
Nicki: My boyfriend cheated on me in the spear of the the moment i planned to destroy his life but then we talked about it and we stayed together its been a few months now since it happend we are still together but i still have very big trust issuses aboutit but i dont talk about it no more it causes arguments do im just gonna try to forgive but ill never forget if he does it again i know im going to just move on i should be enough for him one time might be a mistake but the second time its a choice i love him bit my pride is stronger than that
Zoe: YOU NEVER GIVE A CHEATER ANOTHER CHANCE, POINT BLANK.
Rachel: I was cheated on after almost 8 years and it was re worst pain I've ever felt. Couldn't eat for weeks. I used to wonder why it couldn't have happened earlier in the relationship so I didn't waste so much time on him. After a couple months and deciding to move someplace new, and that led me to my current BF. I realized if things didn't happen when they did I wouldn't be in this wonderful relationship. That's why I am a firm believer in 'everything happens for a reason.'
Claire: I hate*
Shelly: @Allana Hi Alana I am the same my ex husband cheated and now my ex boyfriend has , I just wonder what's wrong with me , I have to stay single for a while to sort my head out ! It is very hard to trust again 😢
Frances: Yes .. It will take a lot of time.. I would know... I got cheated on last week... We were together for nearly 9 yrs .. He was sleeping with someone this past year...crushed my SOUL !! But Love is so powerful t.. That's what's keeping me here ... But it will take a long time to mend things back to the way it was ...smh
AK: My first boyfriend cheated on me. I kind of serial dated to get past it. Not proud, wish I hadn't done that. Sigh. But now, I'm with a man who loves me a lot and we have a fine relationship, so far, so good.
EpicGiny: My boyfriend cheated on me on the first year of our relationship. It hurt like nothing else, and I thought I would never forgive him. I cried, and he cried and everything was just a mess. THINGS CHANGE. If you feel like you can't trust him, the best thing to do is to sit back and take a few moments for yourself to think and relax. Is this what you really want? What if it happens again? What if he does change? Do I see myself moving past this? Once you can full answer all those internal question, then sit with him. He needs to know what you feel. If he really does feel bad for what he did, he will try to make it up. Every one has screw ups. I did forgive my boyfriend, and it took along time to forgive him. And every once in a while the memory does hit me, and it hurts. Just because the wound heals, does not mean the scar leaves. It's tough, but things do get better. I can fully trust my man again. He knows he fucked up, and when those memories come back, he understands the anger and the sadness and the disappointment. Tell your guy how you feel. And it will open his eyes. Keep your head up girls. Don't bottle it up, talk it out. Don't jump into conclusions after he cheats, makes things way worse. The no hiding policy is an awesome advice. Another thing, try listening more to him and communicating more often. He will probably feel like he's not good enough and feel like it pointless to try again because they feel they are hated by you.. Make them feel that you love them and that you guys can work it out. Be strong, and don't give up.
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