Is Your BF Manipulating Your Emotions?

Neecey

No one likes to think they are being toyed with. And even more so, no one wants to be emotionally abused. From inside a relationship, it is not always easy to spot the signs of emotional manipulation. You may think you are doing what your boyfriend wants because it makes him (and you) happy and makes your relationship strong. In fact, he is preying on your insecurities, fears and your vulnerability to simply be in control. Worse, he makes YOU feel bad if you don’t want to do what he wants. No one, but no one, should have that power over you. If alarm bells aren’t already going off in your head, here are the signs to look for:

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1. He’s Passive Aggressive

Passive aggression is one of the most exhausting and demoralizing forms of emotional manipulation there is, especially in the environment of a relationship. If there is a pattern of fake apology after fake apology and situations in which you feel forced to forgive before you are ready, then he is simply doing this so that he can move on and begin manipulating you again. Try to see the difference between real remorse and fake remorse.

2. He Pretends to Help

If he really loves you and respects you, you will not have to ask twice for him to help you in any given situation. In fact, you shouldn’t have to ask at all; it should be an intuitive move on his part to offer help. If he thinks you are being unreasonable by asking for his help, and he only agrees after a degree of reluctance, then you have to question whether he has your best interests at heart.

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3. He Keeps Flip-Flopping

Do you ever find yourself disagreeing with him about certain memories and events that have happened in the past? Be careful and pay attention, he may be trying to alter your memory and perception to elevate his own reputation or point of view. This is a bad sign, as it shows he is lying to your face to try to emotionally manipulate you.

4. He Likes to Guilt Trip

Something that an emotional manipulator really loves to do is send people on guilt trips, constantly making them feel bad about themselves with regards to decisions they have made and things they have done. If your boyfriend does this a lot, then the chances are that he is trying to keep you feeling bad about yourself with low self-esteem purely to feel better about himself and to ensure that you won’t leave him. If this is the case, you need to reconsider the relationship.

5. A Lack of Directness

Do you find that you often find out about annoyances on your boyfriend’s part from his friends rather than him? Talking behind your back and being indirect in this fashion is a tactic to make you paranoid and insecure about yourself. Confront him about it and hash it out face to face. You may see his true colors come to the forefront and it will help you to get out of the bad situation.

6. He Never Takes Responsibility

If he never takes responsibility for his actions and, even worse, tends to blame you and your behavior for undesirable things that he does, then this shows a childish, immature nature and is a clear sign that he is trying to manipulate you emotionally. If you constantly feel responsible and sorry for absolutely nothing then he will always have the higher ground, which is what he wants.

7. You Only Ever do What He Wants

A healthy relationship is down to good compromise, so if your boyfriend is only ever interested in doing things as a couple that he wants to do, then you need to really think about the fact that he is disregarding all of your needs and only selfishly satisfying his own. To him, the relationship is just a way to boost his own ego rather than making you happy as well, a classic sign of emotional manipulation.

Even the most strong-willed of women can find themselves on the wrong end of emotional abuse – because that’s what it is. Call it manipulation, but it’s still abuse. No one deserves and no one needs and no one should put up with it. The solution – run and find someone you deserve and who deserves the amazing person you are.

Have you recognized any of these signs in your own relationship?

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Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I met my used to be sweetheart in 2008 we spent two yrs getting to know each other then by 2011 we were an item. Now he applies to the message on her someone please give me advice.

Passive aggressive men are the worse kind kick him to the kerb as quickly as possible if you are lucky enough to detect it!

They also call men that show these signs narcissistic sociopaths if you google it youll find more information.

I think mine is :(

This totally applies to by soon to be ex husband!! Everything was always my fault, he rarely apologized when he said hurtful things to me, we always did what he wanted and when I did suggest something he didn't want to do anything, and I would have to plead for him to help me with a lot of different things! Arrrgh! 😡

I have been with my bf for 3 years now and he only sometimes shows these signs until I confront him. I use to just sit back and let him do as he pleased even though it hurt me but after a year of that I got tired and now when he treats me that way out of no where he sincerely apologizes because he knows I will not stand for it and just take it anymore. I actually have wondered things as to how his mind thinks because I am in a long distance relationship so he only shows these signs when we are not together but when we are together he is a whole different person he shows nothing on here.... Is that still bad? 😓

Jesus - Passive aggressive is a perfect way to describe my bf.

I met a man at 18 and we dated for 10 years. I often thought well he doesn't beat me or cheat on me so he is a good guy, but alas it takes more than that to be on a healthy living relationship! He was a selfish immature loser who treated me poorly. As soon as I left it was a huge weight lifted from me and now I have a BF who treats me better than I ever could have know! Do not give away your youth to an unworthy creature! It is better to be single than in a bad relationship!

I had gotten with my BF right when I was 18. At that young age it started that way but I didn't realize it because I was so young. Then having children from him and getting married to him, all I ever wanted was just to keep my family together. So I took the emotional and physical abuse. Now after being married to him for 18 not one year was any good. Now that I'm older and becoming much wiser and getting fed up with the abuse, it's time to walk away. So today is the day that I'm filling for a divorce and seeing a lawyer. Even though I am immune to the abuse and it hurts me to tear my family apart I have to keep thinking of myself first. Ladies if you read this, please don't wait so long in the relationship like I did. Just get out fast while you can! Because it will never get any better. Look I have waited 18yrs for a change and instead my emotions are messed up, I am very insecure now even though I get many complaints of my looks and my attitude. I feel like I'm not worthy enough for another person whether it's with a friend, with a family member or even another man to fall in love with I just don't feel like I can meet anyones standards. Please get out while you can. Also too if you think that your trying to keep your family together for your children you may want to rethink it over. Now my children treat me just like there father did. So it doesn't get any better. Walk away while you can. Good luck!

If any of you are reading this article and notice any one of these signs from our boyfriend, LEAVE! It will not get better, no matter how hard you try, that is something that I've learned, and that I'm actually learning now with my bf- it's awful!