All Women's Talk

7 Reasons Why Chocolate is Better than a Man ...

By Shania

There are so many things that are better than a man who's broken your heart, multitudes really, but let’s take a closer look at why chocolate is better than a man. Some men are so-so, and some can be great, but in most cases, chocolate is better. Chocolate is one of the only foods almost all women agree on. I would even go so far to say as chocolate is the most loved food out there. I’m sure you’ve already thought of a few reasons, but let me tell you 7 reasons why chocolate is better than a man, especially your ex-boyfriend.

1 Chocolate Won’t Reject You

My first reason as to why chocolate is better than a man is that chocolate won’t reject you. Let’s face it: some men can be jerks. Some men will do anything to get out of a relationship and can be pretty ruthless about it in the process. I know from experience that rejection isn't fun; in fact my last man rejected me after only a few dates. Though men may reject you, I can guarantee that chocolate never will!

2 Chocolate Will Never Forget to Call You Back

My next reason as to why chocolate is better than a man is that chocolate will never forget to call you back. Guys can be forgetful, I mean really forgetful. I’m honestly not insulting them, they just are (and I suppose women are, too, sometimes). So you know that a guy’s going to forget to call you back at some point, but don’t fret! Chocolate is there at your every beck and call, literally.

3 Chocolate is Always There for You

We've all seen those romantic comedies where the main character is bawling her eyes out over a breakup, alone, with some chocolate. I mean it’s a completely stereotypical thing about girls, or is it? Think about it is, your friends are going to assume you’re over a breakup at some point, but we all have those weak moments. So instead of calling your friend, you break out the food (chocolate usually being a favorite) and you sit down with a book, your journal, or a good movie and just bawl your eyes out. Chocolate is always there for you, and whether you want to admit that you eat it in these situations is your choice!

4 You Can’t Hurt Chocolate’s Feelings

We all have our days where we feel terrible and just want to insult everyone around us. The men in our lives are easy targets on these days, and hurting their feelings is bound to happen. If you think about it though, chocolate doesn't have feelings; it just makes us women feel better. Though maybe insulting chocolate isn't what you think of when you pick up a chocolate bar, it’s impossible to hurt chocolates feelings.

5 Chocolate Won’t Insult You

I'm sure they don't do it to hurt our feelings, and sometimes we women CAN be a little over-sensitive, but insults hurt, don't they? No worries. Chocoate can't speak (I wonder what it would say if it could? Eat me?) so it can't insult you.

6 It Won’t Try to Make You do Something You Don’t Want to

Men are some of the biggest offenders of making women do stuff they don’t want to do. I’m not necessarily talking about them pushing us for sex (though some do that), I’m just saying in general. Just like women, men have things they want women to go to and do. Don’t want to go to his family reunion but he really wants you to? Or maybe it’s the new "Fast and Furious" movie but you just aren’t as excited about it as he is. Whatever the thing you don’t want to do is, chocolate won’t ever try to persuade you to do it.

7 You Don’t Have to Try to Impress Chocolate

Who doesn’t want to wear sweatpants and their hair up every day? It’s impossible to impress everyone. Men can be hard to impress, and honestly it’s hard trying to keep up with what they like. Though a good man doesn’t need to be impressed every single day, why take the chance and stop trying to impress him? Chocolate is impressive, but it doesn’t need to be impressed.

In conclusion, I think we all understand that chocolate is great; so the next time a man has you upset, reach for a chocolate bar. I know chocolate will be happy you sided with it, though you may not be able to determine its emotion while you’re eating it. Also, if there are any more reasons that you know all too well about why chocolate is better than a man, don’t be afraid to voice it in the comments!

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