All Women's Talk

7 Smart Reasons to Delay Having Sex ...

By Alison

Reasons to delay having sex don´t just apply to younger girls who are thinking about it for the first time. Women of any age should also be aware that there are times when it´s better to delay having sex. We live in such a sexualised culture that it´s seen as ´liberated´ to sleep with a guy on the first date. Now, I´m no prude, but I think that there are some pretty sound reasons to delay having sex until the time is right …

1 Being Sure

You really need to be sure before having sex with someone that it´s the right thing for you. Once you´ve slept with someone, you can´t un-sleep with them. Plenty of us have regrets. It´s really important to be sure, so if for whatever reason you´re not, then delay having sex until you are; if you change your mind about the person, you´ll be glad you didn´t sleep with them.

2 Quality

This is nothing to do with the double standards that still seem to apply to men and women regarding numbers of sexual partners. Quality, not quantity, is definitely important when it comes to sex. While it´s important to find out if you are sexually compatible with someone before committing to marriage (unless you want to delay for religious reasons), stacking up the numbers is no achievement.

3 Self-Respect

Again, I repeat that I´m not a prude when it comes to sex, but I do believe that it is important to have respect for yourself and your body. That includes only sleeping with someone who values you as a person and isn´t just in it for the sex. Too many people treat sex as a recreational habit these days – sure, it can be an amazing experience, but don´t risk your self-respect by having sex until the time – and the person – are right.

4 Risk

One of the best reasons to delay having sex is that, even with condoms, there are still risks involved. Too many people are complacent and think that STDs won´t happen to them. If you want to be extra careful, both of you should get checked out before starting a new relationship – if you can´t raise this question with someone, then what does that say about the intimacy of your relationship?

5 Is He Worth Having?

When is the right time to start a sexual relationship with someone? Is it a week, a month, six months? That depends on the individuals concerned. Some are happier waiting, others know that it´s the right thing for them not to wait. If you prefer to wait, and a guy is really into you, he´ll be prepared to wait until you´re ready. A guy who is worth being with will not rush you.

6 Avoid Regret

To some extent, we have to make mistakes to learn what we really want and what is important to us. This can be as true in relationships as in anything else. However, if you listen to your inner feelings, you can become aware that there is something about this guy or the circumstances that isn´t quite right. If you delay having sex, you can avoid some pretty serious regrets.

7 Peer Pressure

The modern form of peer pressure is all around us. It´s often seen as liberated for women to sleep with someone very soon after meeting them, and frequently without any interest in it becoming long-term. Just think of the term ´friends with benefits´. If this is all that both partners really want, then everyone´s happy. But not if one partner really wants more from the encounter. Don´t have sex because you think it´s acceptable, have it because it´s right for you.

As you can see, there are some pretty good reasons to delay having sex, both physical and emotional. Sex is fun, sure, and can be an amazing experience, but bad choices or experiences can also leave us with a lot of regrets that take time to recover from. We all have to take responsibility for ourselves Have you ever had experiences where you think it would have been better to delay having sex with someone?

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