After a breakup, no matter how level-headed we are, it’s hard to feel like yourself and finding ways to mend your spirit is one of the hardest, most fulfilling, and emotional things that we go through. For me, one of the hardest things to do after a breakup was to feel like myself again. Your emotions are all over the place, you try to force yourself not to feel like that, it’s a rollercoaster! So here are 7 ways to mend your spirit after a breakup.
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1. Just Let Go
To me, one of the most important ways to mend your spirit is to just let everything go. We have a tendency to both over-analyze and wonder why we’re feeling the way we do, or we can go the complete opposite way and just be in denial of us not being hurt. No matter how long or short the relationship was, no one likes having their emotions go on a crazy rollercoaster ride. So just relax, let your emotions come out in whatever way they need to come out in, and trust that all will be okay. It’s one of the simplest ways to mend your spirit.
2. Lean on Your Support System
If I hadn't had my friends during this time, I have no idea how I would have been able to make it through. They were all there for me, they made me feel like it was okay to feel numb, dragged me out to events, and never left my side. One of the most beautiful ways to mend your spirit after a breakup is to surround yourself with your friends. They are the people who love you and support you; they know how to lift you up, even when you don’t think it’s possible.
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3. Embrace the Rollercoaster
I don’t know about you, but I was actually completely opposite of being an emotional rollercoaster, I just felt like I was on autopilot. I smiled, laughed, went out, but I was jittery. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I felt unsettled, because I felt like my spirit had been crushed. As time went on, I realized that I would need to go through all these emotions, be it feeling numb, tired, emotional, whatever, I needed to get it out of my system and not suppress it. One of the most therapeutic ways to mend your spirit is to just embrace the craziness that is your emotions!
4. Distract Yourself with Your Interests
Distraction in any form is one of the best ways to mend your spirit after a breakup. Not only does it get you involved in what you love, it makes you social, and when you get lost in something you’re passionate about, you forget all your love troubles. I went out and did the things I always wanted to do but kind of put off, and I started feeling better and better about myself! When you’re doing things you love, you start being the true you that’s slowly making a comeback.
5. Talk It out if You Need to
I am not a fan of talking about my relationships. I never opened up, even to my friends about what was going on in my love life, because I didn’t want to be one of those girls that just always talk about her boyfriend. So naturally, when I went through my breakup I felt the same way. But I slowly realized that talking about it with my friends helped me get things out there, and out of my head. I tend to overanalyze, so this was a good thing for me! Talking it out is one of the best ways to mend your spirit after a breakup.
6. Believe That It Will All Be Okay
When your spirit is gone, it feels like you lose the essence of who you are as a person. It’s hard to believe that you’ll be yourself again, because you’ve just gone through something crushing. But one of the best ways to mend your spirit after you breakup with someone is to truly believe that one day soon, everything will be okay.
7. Change Your Scenery
I loved being downtown; there was something about the energy down there. It was such a huge change of scenery, and somewhere that I loved being so much that I slowly started to forget my post-relationship thoughts and just be happy where I was. Going somewhere different is one of the best ways to mend your spirit after a breakup because it puts you in a new atmosphere, and it allows you to get new perspectives. Sometimes, a change of perspective is all you need to get out of your head.
It’s always hard to get back to the person who you are after a breakup, but slowly and surely, you will get back to that place. Everyone recovers in their own way, in their own time, as long as we take it one step at a time and don’t force ourselves if we aren’t ready. Don’t be too hard on your spirit; it’s a fragile thing that needs to be taken care of! So tell me, what are some of your ways to mend your spirit after a breakup?
Comments
Shadeen: I loved the tips. Going through a breakup now and I definitely don't feel like myself. He put his hands on me and I'm now dealing with going to court and all that. I go through my days feeling numb, angry, resentful and like I wanna scream. I love him and wish we could have worked out but with all the lies, cheating and now this, it's evident I don't need to be with him. I'm trying to remember who I was before him and it's so stressful. I don't know why I'm putting this comment, I guess I just want to get it out. I feel like I have no support. I'm either hearing "I told you so" because I went back when he cheated or I'm hearing "you changed, you're not the same." I didn't change I'm just really hurting right now. Ugh. I'll shut up now.
Haley: Awesome article with great advice! I went through a rough breakup about two months ago now and it's still tough. What helped me a lot was to just take some time to sit down, and let myself think about what was going through my head instead of ignoring how I was feeling.
Keelan_14: That's how I've felt... Trust me time really makes it easier and you will see your life is better off without x
khiy: Oh aabd the nerve of him telling me last time we talked that he still has feelings for me that why he's moved onto the next so fast to get over us. Sure dude. Wow I needed to get this out. But I agree sometimes it feels like will never love or trust a guy that says he loves me and m the first woman to show him what love is ect.. But it a gut instinct thing,it felt genuines so I have no regrets that I fell for him and still love him to an extent. But his behavior in the days before and weeks since our split has given me the push I need to never want him back. Hopefully will be out of my heart too. But know it takes time to get thru,a lot of tears,memories and trying to block things out good we had so I would hate him and get over it faster but the only cure is going thru the process one day at a time and utilizing your support system. Mine has been the best and know it gets better as the days progress
Keelan_14: I'm sorry to hear ur story shadeen... Just keep strong. You will know who your friends are at the end. You are not alone, and we all do crazy things when we are in love it's natural. X
Giyah: I am numb. I have kids with this man. I thought he loved me but after reading some of your posts I guess he was wrong from the start. I've become angry and depressed and I've accepted most of the things hes said to me so now I think I believe it or have believed it for sometime. Anyway thanks for the bloggs but I am numb and I have no friends. If I was to talk to someone I would be told that I was looking for pitty and to stop feeling sorry myself. yeah im really numb
Keelan_14: This has been amazing to read. One of my friends told me to tell myself three positive things about myself each night and repeat it - helpful. I also found that writing it all down helped get it out if my head and it will help others see the light if they read it. My only hurdle now is i still have to see him everyday at work. :0( any tips? X
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