7 Ways to Stop Obsessing over Your Ex after a Breakup ...


Considering how easy it is to stalk someone online these days, breakups have become even harder! Guest contributor Kevin Thompson shares his tips on how you can stop obsessing over your ex after a breakup.

Even though it is easy to remove your ex from your life, it’s not so easy to remove him from your thoughts. If you just broke up and you can’t seem to stop obsessing over your ex, then these tips will definitely help you stop the obsession.

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Cut Him off

Out of sight, out of mind. As long as you keep seeing him and keep talking to him, you are not going to stop thinking about him. Go cold turkey. Remove him from all your social media. Stop calling him. Stop texting him. If he contacts you, ignore him. And don’t try to bump into him at his favorite coffee shop (‘cause that’s not fooling anybody).


Cutting someone off after a breakup is the last thing anyone wants to do, but sometimes it is the best way to move on. It can be difficult to take this step, but it is essential to getting over your ex.

When you cut someone off, it means that you remove them from all your social media accounts, stop calling and texting them, and ignore them if they try to contact you. This can be hard to do, but it is important to take this step to stop obsessing over your ex.

By cutting someone off, you are removing them from your life and allowing yourself to move on. It may seem like this will make it harder to get over your ex, but it will actually help you in the long run. When you remove them from your life, you are eliminating the reminders of them that can make it difficult to move on.

When cutting someone off, it is important to be firm and stick to your decision. It can be hard to ignore them when they reach out to you, but you must remain strong and stay away from them. It can also be difficult to avoid places they like to go, like their favorite coffee shop, but it is important to do this in order to move on.


Give Him the "I Need Space" Talk

Okay, so you’ve removed him from all social media. You’ve stopped calling him. You’ve stopped texting him. But suddenly, you get a message from him. And again, your mind goes into obsessive mode thinking about what he wants. You ignore him, but then he texts again. And then he starts calling. How the hell are you supposed to stop thinking about him if he keeps on calling you?

At this point, you should pick up his call and give him the «I need space and time" talk. Tell him that you’ll appreciate it if he doesn’t call or text for a while. Tell him you need space and time to deal with the breakup. If you say it with a firm tone, your ex is probably going to understand and stop contacting you as well.


The “I Need Space” talk is an important step in the process of getting over an ex after a breakup. It is a way to set boundaries and give yourself the time and space you need to heal. After all, it is difficult to move on if your ex keeps calling and texting you.

The No Contact Rule is often recommended as a way to move on from a breakup. It involves cutting off all contact with your ex for a period of time, usually at least 30 days. This can be difficult, especially if your ex keeps trying to contact you. That is why it is important to give them the “I Need Space” talk.

When you give your ex the “I Need Space” talk, it is important to be firm and direct. You should explain that you need time and space to heal and that you would appreciate it if they did not contact you for a while. This will help them understand your position and give you the space you need.


Start Going out More Often

I know it’s tempting to stay at home and watch «Love Actually» for the 17th time with a tub of ice cream. But it’s not going to help you with the breakup. Go out and do something fun. Do something exciting. Give yourself something to think about other than your ex. Call up your friends and plan a fun weekend with them. Even if you have to force yourself out of the couch, do it. It’ll be worth it.


Breakups are never easy, and it can be difficult to move on after a relationship ends. It’s natural to want to cling to memories of the past and to obsess over your ex. However, it’s important to take steps to move on and to focus on yourself. One way to do this is to start going out more often.

Going out with friends and engaging in activities you enjoy can help you to take your mind off of your ex and to focus on yourself. It can be tempting to stay at home and watch movies, but this won’t help you to move forward. Instead, get out of the house and do something fun. This could include going to a concert, seeing a movie, or going on a hike.

When you’re out, try to be present in the moment and take in the sights and sounds around you. This will help you to be more mindful and to stay in the present. You can also use this time to reflect on your own life and to think about what you want for the future.


Give Yourself Time to Obsess Every Day

Don’t try to avoid all the thoughts about your ex. In fact, give yourself some time every day to obsess over him. Set aside an hour or two to sit and think about him as much as you want. After that, you’re not allowed to obsess over him anymore for the rest of the day.


It can be hard to let go of thoughts of your ex after a breakup, but with the right strategies, it is possible. One of the most important steps to take is to give yourself time to obsess over your ex every day. Allowing yourself to sit and think about your ex for an hour or two can help you process your emotions and move on. After your allotted time, however, it is important to focus on something else for the rest of the day.

It can also be helpful to create a distraction plan for when thoughts of your ex come up. This could include activities like exercise, reading, watching a movie, or talking to a friend. Keeping yourself busy can help you avoid dwelling on your ex. Additionally, it is important to take care of your physical and mental health by eating healthy, getting enough sleep, and taking time to relax.

If you find yourself struggling to move on, you may want to reach out for help. Talking to a therapist can help you work through your emotions and find healthier ways to cope. You can also join a support group or online forum to connect with people who have gone through similar experiences.


Organize Your Thoughts

Obsessiveness is simply repeating the same thoughts over and over again without any conclusion. But if you were to organize your thoughts, your mind won’t have a reason to obsess over the same thing. A good way to do this is to keep a journal. Ask yourself questions like «What were the reasons he and I were not compatible?« "Why should we never get back together in the future?» And write them down. Once you write something down, your mind generally doesn’t feel the need to obsess over it.


Another way to organize your thoughts is to talk to a trusted friend or therapist about your feelings. This can help you gain perspective and work through any lingering emotions. Additionally, finding new hobbies or activities can help redirect your thoughts and focus on something positive. It's also important to practice self-care and prioritize your own well-being during this time. Remember that healing takes time and it's okay to take things one day at a time. Lastly, try to avoid any contact with your ex, as this can trigger obsessive thoughts and hinder your progress.


Do Some Physical Activity

Exercise is a great tool to get over a breakup. It releases endorphins, which is a chemical your body releases to make you happy. Join a gym, go for a swim, or play any sport you like. As long as your moving your booty, you are helping yourself get over the breakup and stop obsessing over your ex.


Learn to Let Go of the Thoughts

No matter what you do, thoughts about your ex are going to pop up from time to time. You have to learn to not let these thoughts affect you. Instead of trying to suppress the thoughts or run away from them, acknowledge them and let them go. Think of these thoughts as a cloud passing over your head. They come and if you don’t try to hold on to them, they will go.

Apart from all these tips, you have to believe in the power of time. Even if you feel miserable right now and you can’t stop thinking about your ex, you have to believe that you will feel better after a while. If not tomorrow, then next week; if not next week, then next month. But you will eventually stop obsessing over your ex and realize that you don’t need him in your life to be happy.

Have you ever obsessed over an ex? How did you stop and move on?

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

shouldn't the title be ....stop obsessing....'???

Best article ever!!! So helpful!

hell yah

Sometimes I think it's not that you want him back or you're obsessed it's just that need to feel wanted. I find that I do that especially after a breakup going to the same places so that he can see me having fun. Although I know that I don't want him, the nasasisstic part of me still wants him to want me

A month and still hurts, I can't understand what happen and am all over the place

I'm going through it now. We decided we were still gonna text here and there just to know how we're doing he would text me every morning and at night to tell me nite nite.. It's been a week and I couldn't do it I had to call him to tell him that I needed time to get over this.. I guess he really wasn't expecting that because he didn't know what yo say..

Deleting all his contacts, and throwing away things you've been holding on helps a lot. I still look at his twitter feed time to time, and I know he looks at mine. But I never randomly text him now when I am drunk. Which I used to do every other time we broke up! Feels better now!

It takes time to heal, but i hear to repeat bad habits and things that put u off and annoyed you of your ex helps get you over him, so just remind yourself of those irritating views he had , lok

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