I'm not trying to turn this into a “but what about the men!” kind of thing, but I think this is a topic that deserves some attention. Not all women have sexual insecurities, but many of us do and we are, thank god, finally getting more vocal about them. We're speaking up about how we feel, what we want, and what we hate when it comes to sex. We're being honest about our fears, anxieties, desires, and kinks. In many articles geared toward the subject, men are viewed as these … sexual experts, sort of, as these creatures who are always confident, dominating, and in control – but is that really true? Isn't it far more likely that men have their own sexual insecurities?
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1. They Worry about Size …
It should come as no surprise that many men are insecure about their penis size. After all, questions of size, length, girth, what's acceptable, and what's laughable are commonplace. Just as women are insecure about our body size, our breasts, and our vaginas, some men genuinely worry about the size of their penises.
2. They Also Worry about Technique
Some men are insecure about their technique, as well. It's good to want to please your partner – excellent, in fact – and I can totally understand this worry. After all, there's no one single right technique. What's pleasurable for one person won't feel amazing to another.
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3. Did They Really Make You Cum?
Many popular tropes target women's orgasms, suggesting that it's hard to bring a woman to climax or that the female orgasm itself is a myth. It's true that it can take a bit more finesse to make a woman orgasm, but it's not rocket science – it just takes some practice, skill, and a willingness to listen. It's a valid worry, though.
4. Or Are You Faking?
As a woman who faked every orgasm I ever had with a male partner, I can understand this one, too. I can't say if a lot of women fake orgasms or not. My deepest hope is for it to happen less frequently because I think women should speak up when they aren't experiencing pleasure, but I don't know how often it happens. Stalkers? Comments? Still, this is why communication is so important!
5. They Are Insecure about Their Bodies, Too
Body shaming is bad for everyone – female, male, and non-binary. I am so glad that women of all sizes and shapes are speaking up and letting the world know that they love themselves without shame. It's often said that male celebrities are given a pass when it comes to weight, age, wrinkles, compared to female celebrities. The same is even true for some regular guys. Most men, however, are just as insecure about their bodies. They worry about not having a six-pack, bulging biceps, enough facial hair, too much – many of the same things we do, really.
6. … and the Jiggles
This deserves a mention of its own. Women know the struggle of this insecurity, but it might surprise you to know how many men understand it, too. The way we see each other when we're naked and doing the deed causes anxiety in lots of people, regardless of gender.
7. They Also Worry about How Their … Stuff Tastes when Getting Oral
Sorry about that, but it's true. Women know this struggle, too, don't we? That worry can even stop some women from asking for oral sex – which, no, don't ever be afraid to ask for that if you want it. Guys shouldn't let this fear get them down, either. There are ways to make sure your stuff is palate-pleasing but, more importantly, if your partner is into you, it's probably not a deal breaker.
Everyone has insecurities, is the point I'm trying to make, especially when it comes to sex. I think that's why we need to be more open about discussing it. It's not a taboo, you know? And knowledge is power!
Comments
JTLWN: please read the only article on my page I need advice with my counterpart and how to approach a sensitive problem
ivyshade: Of course they do just like they have insecurities about their bodies. They are human. Everything a woman can be insecure about, a man can be as well, just in the male form... For example, female: is my butt to big? Male: do I have a beer belly?
Moriano: Omg but what I find very interesting is the fact that some men are worried about how they taste. But a man's genital is external on a male anatomy compare to a female our genitals are placed inside of us. I would think that it would be much easier to clean a penis since its placed outside of the body and not much secretion is coming out except cum or pee
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