If you never watched shows like “Undateable,” you should take the time to discover some intriguing ways to identify a man child. I'd like to testify that they are easy to spot by their slouchy clothing or mix-match socks, but there really isn't a dress code for these guys. Even the most well-dressed man who seems to have it altogether could be a man child lurking in the mist. Let's learn the intriguing ways to identify a man child.
1. Mommy Packs His Lunch
If his mom still packs his lunch, there's the first of my nine intriguing ways to identify a man child. It's understandable for a man to stay with his parents, in dire circumstances, such as a tornado hit his house. But if he has a game console with flat screen combo set up in his childhood bedroom, that's a red flag. If he has the headquarters for the “Hangover” Fan Club in his parents' basement—run!
2. Can't Keep a Job
A man child is unable to commit to anything concrete that distracts from his own wants and desires. This includes employment. They typically do not keep a job more than one pay period and if they do it's only for about two months max. If his reason for his sudden and unexpected unemployment consistently portrays himself as a victim, you're dealing with a man child.
3. Constantly Borrowing Money
If you hear him say, “hey baby, let me hold something?” or “I'll get paid tomorrow, lend me about five?” You may be dealing with a man child. Don't get me wrong, if your guy borrows money and always pays you back, you're good. However, if you discover that he is paying you back after borrowing money or outright mooching off his parents, you have the man child supercharged deluxe model. Bail now while you have the chance.
4. The Boy Cave
A man child, typically, doesn't have his own place. They usually have roommates which in some cases just means you have about four to five man children living in what they perceive to be the man cave. Depending on whether or not these man children are also mama's boys, they may have choice electronics such as flat screens, gaming consoles, and more. If they are not the atypical man child/mama's boy combo then, yes, they have these items. But in either case, it is also likely that their cleaning standards will never reflect your own and it is likely that you will find pizza boxes from three months ago under the couch and dishes all over the kitchen. Girl, if this is the case do not, I repeat, do not go into that bathroom.
5. Decisions, Decisions—Please Make Them for Me
These men are incapable of making a decision on their own, so their typical move is to mimic you. They start to buy the same toilet paper that you do, etc. Why? The decision is already made for them. When you discuss important concepts such as careers, marriage, and other future aspirations, he flakes out completely or asks you what do you want him to do. Do you really want to leave important decisions to someone who clearly doesn't have a mind of their own? No. You also cannot rely on him either.
6. His Car Was Once His Home
I understand being down on your luck, but if he has ever lived in his car out of sheer laziness, he's a man child. There's a specific breed of man child that doubles as the “please pity me crew.” They will not select jobs with the promise of a future, will not save money to get their own place, or make an attempt to have anything concrete, which leads us to our next way to identify a man child.
7. More Zip Codes than Howard Hughes
The pity crew will, if necessary, live in their car until they discover someone whom they can take advantage of. They always target the kind-hearted. They are willing to sleep on the floor in your living room, as long as you will take care of them. When their current situation falls apart, they travel to the next place and begin again.
8. Brief Romances
It's not uncommon for a man child to have short romances. After all, once their maturity levels are discovered, it is hard not to send them back to their mamas. These guys are incapable of committing to anything, especially not a real relationship, as they are only around to have fun. And the moment that the fun ends—they bail.
9. Responsibility? What's That?
If you have a man child in your home, you won't be surprised by this declaration. After all, responsibility isn't their middle name. You'll find that your lawn is never mowed. All areas of your home they encounter are a hot mess. You want him to put the toilet seat down? Honey, you'd better push for better aim instead.
The average man child is good for a couple of laughs, but don't get serious with him. Raise your standards and soar higher. What are some traits you have discovered in men you realized were completely wrong for you?