10 Misconceptions about Abusive Relationships ...

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Regardless of how intelligent and confident we are, some of us still have misconceptions about abusive relationships. I should know - I was in one through most of college. There have been plenty of times when I've thought of how things could have been had I never met him or listened to my friends when they tried to tell me how hurtful and fake he really was. I thought his behavior toward me was somehow my fault, but now I know that isn't true. In fact, a lot of things I thought weren't true. So you won't make the same mistakes I did, here are a few of the more common misconceptions about abusive relationships.

1. People Who Stay in Abusive Relationships Must Be Stupid/weak

One of the biggest misconceptions about abusive relationships is that survivors (I hate the word "victim") seek these relationships out. Perhaps that would be true if you could tell an abuser early, but this almost never happens. Think about it: if a guy hit or insulted you on the third date, you'd think he's insane and drop him flat. Abusive patterns usually emerge after some sort of anchor - emotional attachment, legal ties, having children together, etc. - has been formed. This is part of what makes abusive relationships so difficult to leave - they affect so many parts of your life that leaving can literally mean starting over. My ex and I weren't married and didn't have any children together, but we must not underestimate the power of emotional connections and the sort of manipulation abusers tend to employ.

It's Only Abuse if He's Hitting You

Comments:

Tina
I have just come out of a 29 month relationship with an abusive controlling man. He was charming and romantic and I fell for him hook lime and sinker. I still love him now even though he changed and m...
laura
Is important to learn from this kind of relationships and learn to recognize the patterns soon enough! Know it's going to be ok, and even if it's hard, is important to be opened after a certain time o...
Elizabeth Canales
I have a close friend who has been going through this. I just hope she realized things soon enough.
Cort
I was recently in an abusive relationship for 2 yrs!! I was hit on and called all the names but was so faithful and thought it was love. I haven't been this happy since!! So glad to be out if it!! I m...
moomoo95
^^ what he wants to hear rather than listen to me. When I suggested we take a break he went ballistic. Things in his background were tossed around and broken and he told me that I upset him to the poi...
Rizzy Xx
@Sam Me finally I think that you should handle this situation with the right authority's so I will give u a link that should help you to get the right support and help you need and deserve xx http://refuge.org.uk/what-we-do/our-services/helpline/ Good luck and I hope my comments have helped :) xx
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