Noah tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, so he had room to move his lips against my neck and press down. He had one hand on my waist and the other on my shoulder, sliding my shirt strap down.
"Are you sure you're ready?" he asked when he drew his lips away. "I'll wait another year for you if I have to."
I'd asked myself that question before, back when I had been dating my ex. He had been pressuring me to have sex for months, and I was on the verge of caving. After all, I had been the last virgin in my group of friends. I had just wanted to get it over with, so that everyone would stop bugging me about it.
But thankfully, I found out about him cheating on me before I had invited him into my bedroom. Instead of giving him the opportunity to be the first guy to "have" me, I had been the first girl to break up with him.
But now, two years later, I was with Noah. Smart, sensitive, never-dared-to-pressure-me Noah.
So it wasn't a lie when I said, "I'm ready. I am."
I didn't want to sleep with him to impress my friends (I doubted I'd even tell them about any of this. I liked to keep my private life private). I didn't want to do it in the hopes that it would keep him around. I didn't want to do it just to get it over with.
I wanted to do it, because I loved him and I wanted him and I just knew in my gut that the timing was right.
When it happened, it wasn't like the movies, without any awkward movements. It took him a while to rip the condom open, and it took me a while to slide out of the shirt that got caught around my head.
But it wasn't like the horror stories they told in health class either, because it didn't hurt and I barely bled. It wasn't some spectacular, fireworks-worthy moment, but I enjoyed every second of it.
Why? Well, it wasn't because of what it felt like (even though it didn't hurt, it was a bit uncomfortable, and would take a little while to get used to).
I loved it, because I loved him. Loved the way he looked at me, like my body was the most beautiful thing his eyes had ever taken in. Loved the way he kissed me, like he wanted to absorb every breath I let out. Loved the way he held me afterward, like it didn't matter if we ever had sex again, because he liked me for more than my body.
If I would have done the same exact thing with my ex, position for position, I would have been miserable. I know I would've.
The moment was right, because Noah was right. And that's why I'd never regret it.
** That's the end of this story! And remember, you should always make sure that the men you sleep with are worthy of you!**