Pulling things from the past into your current relationship is something that all of us do – but how do you stop it? Are you even aware of the things from the past that you are pulling in? Do you know how to identify them? Well girls and guys, I’m here to pick apart what you might be pulling into your relationship and how you can stop it. You ready to explore your past? Ready to face that you could be sabotaging your own relationship? Let’s go!
1. Old Habits
By far, one of the most common things from the past that most people pull into their new relationship is old habits. Just because your boyfriend or girlfriend and you constantly got up at a certain time doesn’t mean that your new guy or girl are going to be the same way. You’ve got to break out of the same old routine and come up with something that works in your current relationship. Don’t drag the past in – it isn’t pretty!
Ah, this is something that I constantly did in the beginning of my relationship with Lyndsie – I was constantly comparing her to my ex. Why? Because that’s all I knew. If you are going to bring comparison into your relationship, be prepared to be met with hostility and a whole lot of fighting. Instead, concentrate on getting to know and getting familiar with your new relationship and leave your ex in the past!
3. Lingering Baggage
Baggage, whether it is emotional or physical, is something that a lot of girls and guys face when they enter a new relationship and aren’t quite over their old relationship. I say: leave the past where it is and start afresh. There is no sense (and believe me, I know how hard it is!) bringing all of that extra baggage into your new relationship. Instead, focus on the good and forget the bad.
4. Negative Feelings
While you might not bring in baggage, are you bringing negativity into your new relationship? Are you constantly down because you are no longer with your ex? Are you negative about everything and nothing can cheer you up? Well, that’s one surefire sign that you are a. still in love with your ex and nobody will want to be around you! Cheer up and keep your chin up girls and guys!
This is a hard pill to swallow, I know, but do you constantly resent what your current mate does? Do you think that it could be because you resented your ex for doing something similar? Have a conversation; talk it out instead of letting it fester. Believe me, it is not worth the stress!
6. Pushing Away
Just because your ex wasn’t nice to you and wasn’t someone that could stick out your bad and good moods doesn’t mean that this guy or gal is going to bolt the second that something starts to go downhill – therefore, you don’t need to pull away. Get to know the guy or gal you are with and see how they react to you being down and if they try to cheer you up instead of you pulling into yourself.
Finally, this is a biggie isn’t it? If you got cheated on, how are you ever going to trust someone again? This is a huge piece and you need to understand the new relationship has nothing to do with the old relationship. Keep that in mind and you’ll eventually start to trust your new mate!
Well now, there you have it! All of the different things from your past that could be dragging your current relationship downhill – don’t let it though! Do you have any more examples of the past interfering with your current relationship? Share!