There are many ways you may be sabotaging your marriage and not even know it. Sometimes we know when we offend our spouse and other times we may never know. That doesn’t mean that they aren’t hurt by your actions, though. These are some ways you may be sabotaging your marriage.
One of the ways you may be sabotaging your marriage is by having your priorities out of line. Your marriage should be the first priority in your life. Taking care of the relationship between you and your spouse is one of the best things you can do for your children, too. It helps to make sure their home is secure and happy. Your marriage should not fall behind your job or other people in order of priority.
Most people say things to their spouse that would be considered critical on occasoin. This isn’t a good thing but it is even worse if you are in front of others. It is a good idea to have a policy between you that you will keep your private issues private. Being criticized in front of others is particularly embarrassing to men. Not being critical of each other is a good goal to work toward in general and especially in public.
Here is a little tidbit of advice you may have already figured out. Your husband does not want you to act like his mother. He doesn’t appreciate reminders to do things or instructions on how to do them. I once read a saying that said “be his lover, not his mother.” I think that sums up how most guys feel about this subject.
Ladies, do your best not to complain how your guy does things. Try to just be thankful that he does them, whether it is yard work or helping to clean up the kitchen. If it is something that is desperately bothering you, you might try telling him the way you prefer things but leave it up to him to take your advice. If you try to enforce that advice, he may feel resentful. He might even stop doing things altogether.
There are times when your guy may be giving his best effort to something but falling short. Try to see how hard he is trying. After all, if you were doing something for him, wouldn’t you want him to see past the end result to what your intention was? You can do him the same favor. This is a step that can greatly improve your marriage.
So here is the deal. We all need to get things off our chest from time to time. But there is a difference in talking to a trusted friend who will encourage you in your marriage and man bashing. Man bashing will hurt your guy’s feelings if he hears you. Even if he doesn’t, putting your guy down will do nothing to help your attitude toward him.
Being flirtatious with other men is not going to do your marriage any favors. In fact, it can actually do it a lot of damage. It is one thing to be friendly and a totally different thing to be flirty. And only you know what your intention truly is. If you have been flirty with other men on occasion, ask yourself why and think about how you can change that behavior. Your marriage will be much happier if you save your flirting for your husband.
I would love to hear your thoughts. What do you think will sabotage a marriage? Have you ever caught yourself in one of these actions?
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