7 Undeniably Horrifying Signs You're Dating a Narcissist ...

If you want to know if you are dating a narcissist, it first helps to really understand what a narcissist is. Narcissism is far more than arrogance and vanity. It is actually a mental condition recognized by psychologists. People with narcissistic personality disorder are characterized as being self-obsessed, dangerously manipulative, charming, and showing a lack of empathy for others. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a perfect date - not!

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1. Charming and Confident

Unfortunately, narcissists can be very attractive. I bet if any girl were to name off characteristics of a man she was interested in dating, charm and confidence would rank high on the list. These are also two main traits of a narcissist, making it hard to avoid dating such people.

2. Large Group of Friends

Popularity is cool. But we have to wonder, are these really friends or are they little minions? Narcissists are interested in just any type of friend. What they really want are people who will look up to them and idolize them. Pay attention to how the one you are dating interacts with their friends. If the friends are constantly stroking his ego, you might be in for trouble.

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3. Lack of Boundaries

It is no secret that a narcissist doesn’t care for rules or limits. They see these things as challenges, not safety precautions. It is likely this behavior will affect relationships too. If you aren’t into someone who will push your limits then walk away now.

4. History of Bad Breakups

Ask your man about his past relationships. Why did he and his ex break up? What about the one before that? If you start to see a pattern of messy relationships that end with dramatic breakups, you might be dating a narcissist.

5. Control Issues

Narcissists like to control everything. I bet that kind of control is draining. They have a plan for everything and don’t deal well when things don’t go as they had hoped. Man, can you imagine raising a family with someone who has extreme control issues? Here’s a secret: babies don’t care about your plans. They have their own and they win.

6. Lack of Emotions

In general, narcissists lack emotion. They find them to be a sign of weakness. If you are an emotional person, a narcissist will not be able to relate to your feelings on any level and will find your behavior annoying and confusing. Also, because they lack emotions, don’t expect them to care much about how you feel.

7. OverPowers Conversations

Are you a mute? If you are, this might be a perfect set up for you because you may never get the chance to talk again. However, if you like to have an interactive two-way conversation then forget this guy. He likes to talk about himself too much to care about what you have to say.

These are just some traits of a narcissist. Don’t think you can change these characteristics about a person or that it will get better with time. I promise you it won’t. Forget this man’s charm and move on. There are far better guys to date than a narcissist.

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Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

Dani - narcissism and bipolar disorder are NOWHERE near the same thing. Please don't spread around false facts and further stigmatise the word for something it's not, and making it sound so much worse. Yes, if youre unhappy, leave. But don't toss around mental disorders just because you think they're not good for you.

Sounds like psychopaths too! I had one charm his way into my life, and I'm now finally good riddance of him.

Alyx, I believe we are on the same page. Possibly, I did not communicate effectively before I began discussing how people interacting with those afflicted can often expect their relationship to end. While the criteria in the DSM are different, the association many have with NPD/BPD individuals is quite similar. I didn't clump them together, the professional community has done so when they put both under cluster B in the DSM along with Antisocial Personality Disorder. The first source that came up on google shows the following rates of comorbidity with Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Histrionic Personality Disorder 53% Borderline Personality Disorder 47% Paranoid Personality Disorder 36% Avoidant Personality Disorder 36% Passive-Aggressive Personality Disorder 28% Antisocial Personality Disorder 16% Remember that with all the possible permutations, BPD can manifest itself in 250+ ways. Therapists often have difficulty identifying in their patients. Misdiagnosis is not uncommon by those working in the field. Certainly you have seen the variety if you will, in the way your father presents and what you have encountered occupationally. My ex for example, is unlike those you will find in the mental ward. She is extremely high functioning, has held a job with a 6-figure income for many years, and appears to have no issues until she encounters events that are stressful for her. She is one of the "invisible" borderlines who will not appear in the healthcare system. Like many of those afflicted with NPD, when life's hurdles inevitably appear, accountability goes out the window. It is not uncommon for those with both disorders to blame/project on to someone else. The partner is left dumbfounded, wondering, "what happened?" I think it is necessary for those of us who have encountered unfortunate souls afflicted with NPD or BPD to reach out and warn those who are unsuspecting exactly what they can expect. I don't wish the inevitable heartache on anyone. I was fortunate that my ex and I were never married. I commend you on your efforts with your father.

Narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder are two WAY different things. The disorder is when it's multiplied tons and is uncontrollable. Just being narcissistic doesn't mean you have a disorder.

@Alyx I couldnt agree more! And ladies instead of complaining, just leave the damn relationship. No one is forcing you to date him, you have free will.

I have met the most amazing man and after 9 months, he finally broke up with his GF (only because she found out about me) 😔. However, two months later, he has a conversation with me entailing a talk he and his friend had about him being a narcissist. I am so nervous and scared to be in love with someone like this and showing all the behavior traits!! Not to mention, I broke off my engagement cause I'm in love with this person! My gut is hurting!!!!!!!!!!

Run for your life. The damage to your soul depends on it.

Sounds familiar lol.

Run get out!!!

Those are the exact traits of ppl I know. Omg.

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