Being single is nothing to be afraid of. It can actually be very useful to spend time away from relationships, as it gives you time to focus on yourself. Taking time out from dating can also be beneficial if you're continually falling for guys who don't make you happy. So is it time to take a break from dating? Here's how to tell …
Are you constantly making the same mistake in every relationship? Do you drive boyfriends away because you're too needy, keep falling for guys who are looking for very different things than you, or are you unwilling to make the necessary compromises? If you keep making the same mistakes every single time, then you could do with some time out from dating.
Have you ever heard of the phrase 'serial monogamist'? It's someone who goes from one relationship to another with scarcely a break in between. Some people have one relationship after another because they don't like being single, but whatever the reason for it some time alone can be very healthy. There's no sense in being in a relationship just for the sake of it.
It's good - indeed, necessary - to be committed to a relationship and want to make it work. But if your relationships don't actually make you happy, then what is the point of them? It's far better to stop wasting your time and that of your partner, and stay single until you find the right relationship.
Taking time out from relationships can also help you grow as a person. It gives you the space to learn about yourself and what you need out of life. It also allows you to work on being able to bring more to a relationship (it's not all one-sided!). The more mature and fulfilled you are, the greater likelihood of your relationship working.
There are times in our lives when we just don't have the time and energy a relationship requires. If you have other demands such as studies or really need to focus on your career, then it could be wise to rule out dating for a while. Sometimes we just have other priorities.
It's also really good to avoid rushing into another relationship if you've just had your heart broken. We can jump into a rebound relationship as a way of proving to ourselves that we're still desirable. But it's really wise to take time out to grieve the loss of the last relationship before starting another one.
Paradoxically, if you hate the idea of being single then being single could be exactly what you need. People often fear that they will be lonely if they don't have a partner, or that it means they're not attractive enough to anyone. But that's not a very healthy foundation for a relationship, so learn not to be afraid of those times in your life when you're single.
Have you spent more time in relationships than on your own? What do you think are the best things about being single?
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