When you like a guy, it's easy to twist everything he does and says. You're either going to be 100% convinced that he's in love with you, or 100% convinced that he can't stand you. Of course, neither of those thoughts are all that healthy. It's better to see the world the way it really is. To help keep you tethered to reality, here are a few paranoid thoughts that you should stop having about your crush:
Snapshot Survey
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Please subscribe for your personalized newsletter:
1. That He Thinks You’re Ugly
It doesn't matter if you look completely different than all of his exes. Just because they were all pretty, it doesn't mean that you're ugly. Beauty comes in a million different shapes and sizes. Besides, boys can get pretty horny when they're young, so chances are that he actually is attracted to you, even if he's not making a move.
2. That He Doesn’t Want to Talk to You
Unless he's glancing around the room and looking for a way to leave whenever you two talk, you shouldn't assume that you're bothering him. He's probably having just as much fun as you are. So stop putting yourself down. You're a great conversationalist, and he's lucky to have you as a friend.
***
Certainly, if he's sharing laughs, leaning in closer, and eagerly responding to your stories, it's a signal that your company is enjoyable. Remember, actions often speak louder than words. So read those subtle cues and embrace the connection. Trust in the vibes you're getting and give yourself credit for the good energy you're bringing to the conversation. Confidence is key, and yours should be shining - just like your conversational skills. Keep being your amazing self, and watch the friendship blossom.
Frequently asked questions
3. That He Thinks You’re Desperate
Don't be embarrassed about sending him the first text. He isn't going to assume that you're desperate, just because you initiated a conversation. If anything, he's probably happy that you're making the first move, so that he doesn't have to. For boys, that's a breath of fresh air.
***
Many women worry that men will judge them for being too forward, but this is often a baseless fear. In the modern dating world, gender norms are continuously evolving, and confidence is a trait that’s universally attractive. So, take a breath and send that text without second-guessing. More often than not, your crush will be impressed by your boldness. Remember, showing interest isn't synonymous with desperation; it's a sign of strength and self-assuredness.
4. That He’s Never Going to like You Back
Why do you think this? If it's because of the way that you look or how smart you are, you're being ridiculous, because you're a catch. You have to think highly of yourself. The more confidence you have, the more boys you'll attract.
***
Everyone has their insecurities, but when it comes to love, you can't let those doubts cloud your judgement. Maybe he's giving off mixed signals or hasn't noticed you yet, but that doesn't mean he won't in the future. Keep in mind that attraction is more than just looks or intellect; it's about the spark and connection between two people. And who's to say what might happen if you share a genuine moment together? So, instead of dwelling on your fears, focus on being your fabulous self, and let the rest unfold naturally.
5. That You’re Wasting Your Time
If he already has a girlfriend, or has made it clear he's not interested in you, then you probably are wasting your time. There are better men out there for you. However, if you've been flirting like crazy, and it seems like he might actually like you back, don't fool yourself into believing you're wasting your time. It takes a while to get the guy you want, so be patient.
***
Sticking around in the hope of changing someone's relationship status or feelings can be like waiting for paint to dry—pointless and frustrating. Embrace your self-worth and move on to someone who's available and reciprocates your feelings. For those moments of uncertainty, remember, building a connection takes time and subtle hints often need more than one take to hit the mark. Keep your spirits high and your heart open, but also stay grounded in reality. Love shouldn't be a one-way street; it's about mutual interest, respect, and the excitement of discovering mutual affection.
6. That He’s Intentionally Trying to Hurt You
If you assume that his compliments aren't genuine, and that he's secretly playing some sort of prank on you, you need to take a breather. The world isn't out to get you. That means your crush probably means exactly what he says. However, if somehow your wild ideas are right, then he's not worth your time. Why would you want to be with someone so cruel?
7. That He Only Wants Sex
A lot of boys are interested in sex. However, if he's given you every reason to believe that he genuinely likes your personality and wants to be with you for more than your body, you shouldn't freak out. Your crush probably isn't the best actor. He wouldn't be able to lie to you so convincingly.
8. That You're Bothering Him
If you feel you're texting is bothering your crush, you should analyze their responses. One word answers are probably a hint they're not engaged-however, it could just mean they're busy at the moment. Stop and see if they engage later. If not, you've got your answer with minimum investment.
9. That You SOund Stupid
Stop being so caught up in trying to be cool and let him get to know you for you. Trying to hard WILL end up with you sounding silly, but relaxing and letting things flow will have him liking you more for being yourself.
10. That You're Only a Friend
It's great to get close with your crush, but be sure you don't get so close before things take off that he friend zones you. If he's talking to you, flirting, and showing interest, then he's probably into you too. No need to be afraid he's not and place yourself in the cool "girl" friend role before you become the girlfriend.
Remember, you're probably making things worse than they actually are. Chances are that your crush thinks you're a great girl! How do you think your crush feels about you?
Comments
Naomi: Ahhaha this is soo true these thoughts ran through my mind ever day during school ugh so happy that you said this cause it makes me think this less
Allyson: not sure if this applies to a sort of close friend lol
Oline: Actually the "it takes a while to get the guy you like" had a huge impact on me.. I've never realized that, I usually just get what or who I want right away, but I guess there is some truth and definitely wisdom behind this! Thanks 🙏
Missrecess: Aw thank you!!! The one worded answer one was helpful. He takes forever to open my messages!!
Donnasherba: Don't know we shall see LOL
:
Feedback Junction
Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge