All Women's Talk

Reasons Why You Tend to Gain Weight when You Have a Boyfriend ...

By Lyndsie

Let me preface this with a few disclaimers: yes, I know that not everyone gains weight when they're in a relationship, but it does happen to a great many people; also, in spite of the title, you can be a boy, a girl, or someone who falls somewhere in between who is in a relationship with a boy, a girl, or someone who falls somewhere in between. The point is, some people notice that they tend to gain more weight when they're in a relationship. It might seem weird, but it actually makes a lot of sense. It's not because you stop caring, it's not because you've “landed” your partner and don't feel the need to “put forth effort,” and it's definitely not because you're lazy.

Table of contents:

  1. The emotional roller coaster
  2. You get comfortable
  3. You typically eat out more
  4. You might not be as active
  5. You're not worried about attracting anyone else
  6. Your partner loves your body
  7. You start eating what your partner eats
  8. Sometimes you might eat even when you aren't hungry
  9. Your boo compliments you no matter what
  10. You might skip working out to spend time together
  11. Some relationships can influence the way you eat
  12. You spend your weekend evenings snacking
  13. Your partner may cook fatty foods
  14. Sometimes, you indulge with your love
  15. You are way too happy to care about your weight
  16. Think about getting active together
  17. Work off some of those indulgences … together

1 The Emotional Roller Coaster

Here's one huge reason why some people gain weight when they have a partner, especially during those tumultuous early days. If you're an emotional eater (me!), then you may find yourself snacking more while you're still in the first flush, particularly if things are brand new or in any way unsure.

2 You Get Comfortable

Feeling comfortable in your relationship is wonderful. It's a blissful place to be, a place where you aren't constantly worried about making a bad impression. You stop fretting about the silly things, like letting your new boo see the messy way you eat spaghetti. Complacency is no bad thing, but as you get more comfortable, you stop trying to hide your love of chocolate or your preference for eating Goldfish crackers in bed.

3 You Typically Eat out More

This isn't true for all couples, of course, but it's true for many, especially when you first start dating. You're going out on dates, after all, and many of those dates probably involve eating out. Restaurant portions being what they are, you can see how this might lead to some weight gain.

4 You Might Not Be as Active

Some relationships revolve around various activities. Others revolve around sedentary activities, such as reading together, playing video games, or binge watching Netflix. Really, though, a few pounds are a small price to pay for all those hours you spend cuddled up together.

5 You're Not Worried about Attracting Anyone else

This is true, too. I am absolutely not saying that this means you let yourself go in any way, and not every woman worries about weight when they're single and looking for a new relationship. When you're with someone you care about, however, you stop worrying about looking so perfect all the time. You let go a little, you relax, and that's fabulous.

6 Your Partner Loves Your Body

You should love your body, too, of course, and you should never base your happiness or self-worth on what someone else things about you. That being said, however, it feels good when your partner loves your body just the way it is. Doesn't it?

7 You Start Eating What Your Partner Eats

Hey, it happens. Your partner's favorite foods might be different from yours, s/he might love fast food or sushi or steak or desserts. Even snacking together can lead to some weight gain.

8 Sometimes You Might Eat Even when You Aren't Hungry

This happens, too, especially if you're out on a date. At the movies, you might shovel in the popcorn even if you're not particularly hungry, simply because it's popcorn and it's delicious. If you're hanging around with friends or another couple, you might snack just because. If you're waiting around for your girlfriend or boyfriend to call or text, you might snack because you're nervous, worried, or bored.

9 Your Boo Compliments You No Matter What

Knowing that someone loves you and thinks you're beautiful no matter what takes off some of the pressure. It's not that you need someone else's validation, necessarily, but the standard of beauty women are expected to conform to is so ridiculously high and so exhausting, it's just nice to know that someone doesn't give a flying flip if you gain some weight.

10 You Might Skip Working out to Spend Time Together

Some couples choose to work out together, and that's awesome. Others are so eager to spend time together that they may willingly sacrifice their workout time, which is also awesome – we've all been there, right?

11 Some Relationships Can Influence the Way You Eat

In fact, a relationship can influence the way you eat in any number of ways. Again, you might feel far less pressure to conform to society's standards. You might eat more because you're happy or content. If the relationship is contentious, stressful, or troubled, you might eat more because you're nervous, scared, or upset – in which case, of course, you need to think about whether you're really happy.

12 You Spend Your Weekend Evenings Snacking

Because of those stay-at-home dates and Netflix binges, of course. I get it.

13 Your Partner May Cook Fatty Foods

Meeting someone who cooks is awesome! However, their signature dishes might be a little fatty or unhealthy. If s/he cooks for you often, that can explain any extra pounds.

14 Sometimes, You Indulge with Your Love

You split dessert. You share milkshakes. Your boyfriend brings over your favorite chocolate all the time. Your girlfriend makes your favorite meal whenever you ask. Indulgences are so sweet, but they can add up.

15 You Are Way Too Happy to Care about Your Weight

Your life feels perfect, just the way it is – and you feel perfect, just the way you are. You're too happy to give a damn about the scale.

16 Think about Getting Active Together

If you want to avoid weight gain when you're in a relationship, or if you want to shed any pounds you've gained, all you have to do is find out how to get active together. You don't have to go to the gym if you don't want to. Take a walk around the block or go on a bike ride together.

17 Work off Some of Those Indulgences … Together

Remember – sex is an excellent physical activity.

You are more than your weight. Remember that. This is in no way saying that you should be ashamed. You have to be happy. You need to feel secure. Do you tend to gain weight when you're in a relationship?

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