How to Turn Your Summer Fling into Something More ...

It isn’t always easy to pick up the signals, but you will not want to put effort into making your fling last past the summer if he isn’t invested in going forward. If your fling is not interested in prolonging the relationship or is not willing to give it a chance, it is best to leave it and walk away. When you're figuring out how to turn your summer fling into a relationship, it's always a good idea to consider his feelings.

Obvious - duh! No matter how far apart you might be, you have to stay in touch. It doesn’t really matter if it’s just small tidbits or conjuring up memories of the fab time you had, keep the communication flowing. Don’t just text. Make the effort to call and even better, schedule some FaceTime or whatever other video calling you use. Seeing him will remind you why you’re bothering and it will do him good to see your pretty face.

Obviously, this depends on the distance between you. You’ve spent time together, probably doing all sorts of fun things in the summer days and nights, especially if you met on holiday. When summer ends and you have to go back to school or work, it is easy to let those fun things fall to the wayside. Plan exciting dates, a few adventures and fun things to do together, even when summer is over.

You probably bonded over the summer doing activities you don’t do on a regular basis or found a kindred spirit in a love of the beach, countryside, city, etc. Now that you’re back home, it’s time to find some new things to bond over. Explore each other’s interests to find common ground on which you can build your relationship going forward.

Introduce him to your friends and go out with them as a group. If you’re restricted to long-distance contact, invite your BFFs to one of your video sessions and get him to do the same. Keep it casual so he doesn’t feel pressured. Summer flings can often feel like they’re conducted in a bubble so it’s important to widen your connection out into the community if you’re looking to make it last longer.

This doesn’t mean getting all possessive. As just a fling, there was no commitment. If you want a relationship, don’t play games or be ambiguous in your intentions and feeling. Make it clear you’re not seeing anyone else. If he’s into you, he’ll get the hint and stop seeing other girls.

A relationship is more grounded than a fling so you need to treat this next phase like that. He needs to see you as relationship material, so continue to live your life. Don’t stalk him or jump the gun, like changing your status on your Facebook page. Continue to see your friends, keep doing things you love and continue to take care of yourself so you look good. If you aren’t flighty, clingy, needy or imbalanced, he’ll see you as relationship material.

A fling isn’t like an unrequited crush. You’ve already got the connection so now it's about making it stronger so you move seamlessly into a relationship. Be confident and assertive. Don’t be demanding or domineering. You aren’t telling him what you want, you’re showing him and telling him.

This is a time to enjoy. If the magic is there, sometimes it just needs a little push. And your summer fling might turn into a relationship sooner than you think.